BESS:Good afternoon, Paula. Out late last night?
[PAULA was out very late wining and dining with BRETT and later having sex]
PAULA:No, I wasn’t. And anyway, I’m only two minutes late.
BESS(flustered):Well, so what? You’re still late.
(A buzzer is heard)
BESS:That’s my patient. Will you take this tray in?
(PAULA nods and then rolls her eyes as BESS exits. She stands and picks up the tray)
INTERCOM:Nurse Rooney to Dr Mahler’s office. Nurse Rooney to Dr Mahler’s office please.
(PAULA drops the tray and falls over. She stands up with her hair in a mess and a very red face. She exits in a hurry.Scene:BRETT’s office. BRETT is playing with a toy car from his desk)
BRETT:Vroom vroom!
(A knock is heard. PAULA enters)
PAULA:Dr Mahler?
(BRETT jumps and drops his car)
BRETT:Er…yes?
PAULA:You wanted to see me?
BRETT(high voice):I did?(low voice) Oh yes, I did.
(PAULA closes the door and walks right up to his desk)
PAULA(seductive):So…what’s up?
[BRETT is busy looking at her legs in the tiny nurses uniform. Meanwhile, PAULA is staring at his chest with longing]
PAULA:Dr Mahler?
[BRETT snaps out of it]
BRETT:Yes, right. Paula, I’ll be blunt :I don’t think we should see each other anymore.
[PAULA is shocked and upset]
PAULA:But why?
BRETT:My career, my reputation…there are a million reasons.
(He looks into her eyes. In a flash, PAULA has straddled him and they are wildly making out. Just as he is unbuttoning her uniform, BESS walks in)
BESS:Oh…ah…AHA!!!
(PAULA leaps off of BRETT and starts buttoning up, all the while blushing heavily. BRETT is paralyzed with fear)
BESS:Oh ho ho, I’ve got you now! I’m going straight to Mr Ginger!
PAULA(angry):You stupid old hag! You’re just jealous!
BESS:Oh, now you’re insulting me? You little WENCH! You’re going to lose your job! I’m going to Mr Ginger RIGHT NOW!!!
(she runs out. PAULA turns to BRETT)
PAULA:What are we going to do?
(BRETT just sits there, still paralyzed and sneaking peeks at her half-buttoned uniform)
(Scene:The Ginger Heights golf links, where a tournament is going on. It’s the final shot, and all of the players but DESDEMONIA and JETT have been eliminated. STEPHANIE is reporting with the help of her cameraman RUFUS)
STEPHANIE:Allright, dickhead, this time turn the camera ON, ok?
RUFUS:Anything for you, baby.
(he grins and laughs with a snort. STEPHANIE rolls her eyes and starts fixing her hair. She then turns to the camera flashing a brilliant smile)
RUFUS:3…2…rolling!
STEPHANIE:Well, folks, we’ve just seen the last player eliminated before the final round. It’s now down to our two locals, Desdemonia Darling and Jett Smith.
[STEPHANIE hates DESDEMONIA for reasons to be disclosed later this season]
(the camera turns to the tournament. STEPHANIE’s voice is heard off camera)
STEPHANIE:Oh, and a beautiful shot by Jett! Straight onto the green. Ok, here comes Desdemonia. She’s swinging and….oh, it’s in the trees, folks. I guess we can all see who going to win this match….
(She fades out as we flash to JETT’s changing room after the tournament. He is alone and shirtless. Just then, DESDEMONIA enters)
DESDEMONIA:I just thought I’d let you know that I let you win on purpose.
(JETT laughs)
JETT:Please. Why on Earth would you do that? Nope, you’re just a bad player.
DESDEMONIA:But…
JETT:No, I don’t want to hear it Des. Ah, nope, zip it, zip it, ZIP IT!!!
DESDEMONIA(screaming):WILL YOU JUST SHUT UP?!?!?
JETT(also screaming):ME SHUT UP???WHY DON”T YOU SHUT UP YOU CRUSTY OLD SPINSTRESS!!!!
DESDEMONIA:OH, I’M A SPINSTRESS, AM I? AND I’M SURE YOU’RE JUST MR HOT STUFF!!!
(They continue to scream at each other for some time. Suddenly, JETT grabs DESDEMONIA and starts kissing her. Before you know it, they’re having sex on the table)
[STEPHANIE has hidden in a closet in JETT’s changing room trying to get some dirt on DESDEMONIA]
(STEPHANIE is scribbling wildly on a notepad)
STEPHANIE:Perfect.
(Scene:The dining room at the Ginger household. JOSEPH, VIOLET, ANASTASIA, JOSEPH 2 and CORDELIA are eating dinner)
JOSEPH:And so then I said, ‘Well you should see the elephants’.
(He laughs hysterically. VIOLET laughs politely but not sincerely)
JOSEPH 2:Ha ha, Dad. NOT! Your jokes bite!
(He sticks out his tongue and laughs)
[JOSEPH 2 loves to stick out his tongue]
(JOSEPH looks crushed)
VIOLET:Joseph Edward Ginger the second! Apologize to your father this instant!
JOSEPH 2(mumbling):Sorry Dad.
(JOSEPH looks satisfied and turns to VIOLET. JOSEPH 2 sticks his tongue out behind his father’s back)
ANASTASIA:Hey Dad, there’s a Nickelback concert this Saturday. Can I go? My friend has tickets.
JOSEPH:But honey, you know that Grandma May eats dinner with us on Saturdays.
(ANASTASIA looks exasperated)
ANASTASIA:Can’t I skip it just this once? They’re only playing on one night!
(Before JOSEPH can reply, VIOLET butts in)
VIOLET:You heard your father! The answer is no!
[ANASTASIA hates VIOLET because she is not her real mother, and the feeling is totally mutual]
(Now Anastasia is really mad. She starts yelling at VIOLET)
ANASTASIA:Who asked you? You’re not my mother!
JOSEPH:Now, Anastasia…
VIOLET:Well thank God for that! If I was I’d die of shame!
(There is silence at the table. CORDELIA starts to cry)
VIOLET(to Anastasia):Now look what you’ve done, you little cow!
(She turns to CORDELIA)
VIOLET: Ssh, it’s ok honey, mommy’s here, mommy’s here.
JOSEPH 2:Anastasia’s in trouble! Na-na-na-na-poo-poo!
(he laughs and sticks out his tongue at her)
ANASTASIA:God, you people are impossible!
VIOLET: Oh, as if you’re not! Joseph, do something!
JOSEPH:Anastasia, please go to your room. You are grounded for a week and you are not going to that concert!
ANASTASIA:But Dad, she…
JOSEPH:NOW!
ANASTASIA(screaming):FINE!(under her breath) I don’t need you anyway.
(She runs out of the door. VIOLET glares after her. CORDELIA is still crying, and JOSEPH 2 is alternating between giggling and sticking out his tongue)
[The Gingers don’t know it, but ANASTASIA is not in her room. She has packed a bag and left the house]
Tune in next time for another episode of…Purple Twilight!!!
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