His leaves shook. He slid lower in his seat. When was the door going to open, beckoning him in for his turn in the room? What would he find, beyond the mysterious door? FLUSH! A cabbage walked out of the restroom. Finally it was his turn.
The mall was crowded at noon. Shoppers cascaded in every direction, a sea of green and red and orange heads moving as if floating on some invisible current. The spiked heads of pineapples stuck above the crowd, and bunches of grapes undulated like so many purple and green amoebas.
Mr. Choy made his way to the food court, the smells of coffees and teas spilling out from the cafés, the patrons speaking in rustling tones. Before he entirely knew where he was, he stood in front of the Panda Espresso, one of the biggest cafés in the mall. A sign on the wall read Help Wanted- Inquire Within. He dove into the crowd in the shop, brushing up against apples and oranges in a heated debate, a daikon beating a radish at chess, and a solitary jicima in a suit reading the financial pages.
“Could I speak to the manager about the job opening?” Mr. Choy asked the gnarled ginger rot behind the counter.
“I am the manager,” the root said, “I’m Ginger, but everyone calls me The Root. If you’re interested in a job you can start right now. I’ve been behind this counter since three in the morning.”
“Okay then,” answered Mr. Choy, donning an apron and stepping behind the counter, “I’ll take it.”
“Good,” said The Root. “I’ll be in the back if you need me.”
The Root opened the door to the back office and disappeared. Almost at that instant, Mr. Choy’s two roommates, the mushrooms, walked in the door.
“Hey BC!” they shouted as they walked across the crowded shop. “Dude! You finally got a job!”
“Why yes I did,” said Mr. Choy, “What would you two like to drink this afternoon?”
“We want two Panda Mocha Grandes,” said the first mushroom.
“With extra panda,” added the second mushroom.
“And could we have a big bucket of those Panda Egg Rolls?” continued the first.
“With extra Panda!” added the second mushroom.
“Okay, two Mocha Grandes and a dozen egg rolls,” listed Mr. Choy, “Anything else?”
“Well, we kind of don’t have any money,” said the first mushroom.
“so we kinda hoped…” continued the second mushroom.
“That I’d give you the food for free,” finished Mr. Choy. “I’m sorry, but I just can’t do that. I don’t have any money myself, and besides, it’s my first day.”
“HEY EVERYBODY! THIS GUY SAYS THAT THEY’VE RUN OUT OF PANDA!” yelled the mushrooms, “AND HE SAYS THAT WE NEED TO START USING CUSTOMERS!”
“WE’LL START WITH A PAIR OF BAKED MUSHROOMS,” shouted Mr. Choy, completely losing his cool. “ANY TAKERS HERE?”
“WHAT’S GOING ON HERE?” asked The Root, as he appeared from the back room. “I TRY TO LEAVE YOU IN CHARGE FOR FIVE MINUTES AND YOU GET IN A SHOUTING MATCH WITH MY CUSTOMERS! GET OUT, ALL THREE OF YOU!”
And with that The Root picked up the three of them and hurled them out the door to the café.
“Thank you, Mr. ‘we don’t have any money,’ thank you for ruining my career at Panda Espresso! You guys really need to find something else to do other than ruining people’s jobs!” fumed Mr. Choy as he dusted himself off. However, the mushrooms were nowhere in sight.
“All the better, he thought, for me to go and try my luck at Baja Flesh” he thought as he dove back in to the crowd surrounding the food court. “It’s good that they’ve disappeared for a while.”
