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Full of Grace: Chapter 5
Kevin blinked a few times and seemed to pull himself out of wherever he had transported himself to. "Wh..where was I?"
Nick stroked his hand over Kevin's dark hair, "It's ok, take your time. I've got all night."
Kevin couldn't understand why Nick was doing this. After what he had just done to him, why was he still here? Why was he comforting him? Why wasn't he running away screaming bloody murder? Regret washed over him again about what he did, bringing forth more sobs from deep within him.
The comforting arms around him only tightened and he felt the tears break through the dam of his eyelids and streak down his face. For his whole life he could count the times he had cried on one hand. His first heartbreak, his father's death, the first time she..... Now it seemed that he had cried more in the last months to fill eight lifetimes. Nick was one of now three people who had seen him cry. The other two being his mother and Brian.
It took every ounce of will power, but he managed to quell the tears. I "I knew at that party I was in over my head, Nick. I just had a gut feeling....."
I stood in the Ladies Room, hearing the party going on outside of the door, the smell of Stefanie's perfume still lingering in the air around me. It seemed like something out of a dream. I was the responsible, boring one. I didn't do things like this, did I?
The stinging trails on my chest told me otherwise, that I had done it. For once in my life I had let go and done something totally out of character for me.
I took a paper towel and wet it, running it over the scratches, cleaning of the dried blood and rebuttoning my shirt, straightening myself around. I looked at myself in the mirror and smiled. He liked this feeling of going against what everyone expected of him. It was more intoxicating than the drinks that were flowing freely at the party outside of the door. With one last look at my newly acquired war wounds, I rejoined the party.
As soon as I went near the dance floor, I was grabbed by friends and slapped on the back in congratulations. For a split second I was horrified that they knew what had just happened, but then I realized that they were celebrating the new release.
As I was pulled further into the crowd, I kept looking around for the light blue of Stefanie's clothes, the blondness of her hair, but there was no sign of her.
The party wore on until the early hours of the morning, but I never caught sight of her again. It seemed as if she had disappeared into thin air.
Nick's touch on Kevin's shoulder brought him back from his memory, "We always wondered whether you had actually done the deed with her at that party. We could sense something had happened, and we were pretty sure that was it."
Kevin nodded, "Biggest mistake of my life...."
For the next week, thoughts of Stefanie were never far from my mind. It was if she had injected herself into my bloodstream. Every thought, every breath seemed to be laced with thoughts of her. She haunted me like a ghost. No one at the party seemed to know her, but everyone remembered seeing her. I had resigned myself to the fact that she had gotten what she wanted off of me and I was never going to see her again.
Nick, Howie, AJ, Brian and I were all just chilling at my place when the phone rang. AJ was being his normal insane self and dove for it, "Hello Hong's House of Horse Meat, Mr. Ed speaking!" He listened to the person on the other end for a second and then held the phone out to me, "It's for you, Train."
His eyes were dancing as I took the phone from him.
"Hello?"
"Hello Kevin." It was her! I knew that voice instantly. How had she gotten....where did....oh hell, it didn't matter! All that mattered was that she was real, that she had called!
"St..Stefanie?"
Her low throaty laugh was like music to my ears, "I see you still remember me. That's a good sign."
I chuckled and turned my back on the four idiots who were making kissy faces and obscene noises from the couches. I lowered my voice to keep them from hearing, "I remember alright. I'm having trouble thinking of anything but."
I could almost hear her pleasure at knowing that she was under my skin. "Kevin, I want to see you again."
My heart sped up, until I thought it was going to gallop out of my chest. Cool. I had to play it cool. "Okay. When? Where?" I slapped my hand to my face in frustration. Oh no Smooth Boy, that didn't sound desperate at all. Ugh.
"Now."
My eyebrows shot up, "Right now?"
"Right now."
I looked at the my four friends, today was the day we had set aside for just us. We had done nothing but work whenever we were together, now that the process of getting the new CD was over with, today we were getting together just to hang out and have fun. I couldn't bail on them, we had all promised each other this time. "I can't today. Any day but....."
I was cut off by a click and then I was speaking to a dial tone. I placed the phone back on the hook, not know exactly what had happened.
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