Character personas:
Joey-all he can think about is food, amazingly I didn’t involve girls with that.
Lance- so friggin gay, but not everyone understands. only cares about pink bedroom set(you’ll see)
J.C.- overbearing crack god.
Justin-doesn’t know he’s white, all he cares about is beating the old fart in video games.
Chris-nothing big, he’s most normal, only cares about beating the baby in video games.
DISCLAIMER: obviously, I don’t own/know *N SYNC. this is just fiction. I seriously hope they are not really like this. I know nothing about what they do in private. This was originally suppose to make fun of Joey mostly, since he’s my fave. but Lance and J.C. get some pretty hard blows. Chris has a line about Lance that I apologize to Lance for everytime I read it. Enjoy my first story!
The guys are sitting on the bus just hanging. Chris and Justin are playing video games, J.C.’s asleep in the back, Lance is watching the game, and Joey is searching for something to eat. Suddenly the phone rings…and rings…and rings. Chris ends up getting it.
Ch: Man Lance, why couldn’t you get it? I was winning.
La: You were closer, and besides, my nails arn…
Ch: Ah, shut up. picks up phone Hello?…Yeah, what do you want?…HE WHAT!?!…yeah we’ll be
there. bye.
Ju: What da heck waz dat ‘bout?
Ch: ignoring Justin Joey I’m gonna Kick you butt!
Jo: mouthful Wha? Wha hid I dho?
Ch: That was Papa John’s on the phone, they’re collecting your tab.
Jo: still eating yeah? sho?
Ch: DO YOU KNOW HOW MUCH YOU OWE?!? WE’RE ALL GONNA HAVE TO PITCH IN SO
YOU DON’T GO BROKE!!
Jo: he had stopped eating cause Chris scared him and made him drop it Thanks man!
Chris stops himself from punching Joey and goes to get some things and wake up J.C.
Ju: Yo fo'! why you gots to go eatin so much?
Joey just shrugs because his mouth is again full
They go on doing what they were doing, when a sudden shriek of WHAT! told them Chris had just woken up J.C.
Jc: storming towards Joey First Chris wakes me up, then he tells me why he had to. WHAT ARE YOU
AN IDIOT???
Everyone but Joey looks at J.C. as if that question was as stupid as asking Joey if he liked food.
And again all Joey can do is shrug.
Jc: Oh, nevermind! Let’s just hurry up so we can make the show tonight. Everybody get your
checkbooks.
Ch: Ok, got mine.
Ju: I gotz mine. Lez go!
La: Wait, I can’t find mine digging through some sort if bag
Jc: Lance, just dump the purse out, it will make it faster.
La: But that makes a mess J.C. glares at him Oh, ok. dumps purse Oh! Here it is! Ok, Let’s go.
Lance stuffs everything back in his purse and starts to leave with it.
Ch: NO WAY MAN! We already told you that stays here!
La: Darn! Can’t I this once?
Ch: No! It’s embarrassing and it looks bad.
La: Fine! But I won’t like going with out it.
Ju: Who cares! Lez go!
They all leave and drive over to Papa John’s.
Once they get there they can tell Joey’s forgot the reason the went.
Jc: Joey, we are not here to eat, and no we can’t get anything any way.
Jo: Darn. Can I stay out here then? I think there’s some Twinkies in the glov…
Jc,Ch,La,Ju: NO!!!
They all walk in with Joey looking pitiful until he doors open and he can smell the pizza.
Jo: to employees Hey John! Waz up Susan!
Jh,Su: Hey Phatman!
Su: You want your usual three larges, or do you want four since your buds are here?
Jo: Yeah sur…
Jc: WE ARE NOT HERE TO EAT JOEY!!
Jh: to Susan Ouch. I’d hate to live with him.
Jc: calming down We are here to pay Joey’s tab. He needed all our help or he would have gone broke.
Su: ok whatever. Come over here and we’ll divide the tab up
They all go the side of the counter and begin to divvy up the tab. J.C., who keeps glaring at Joey, is looking more pissed by the millisecond. Lance looks hurt. Chris and Justin Just wanna get back to their video game. Joey is looking around like a sad puppy.
Ch: There, all done. Can we go now?
Ju: Yea! I wantz ta getz outa hear.
La: to himself my shoe money, gone! My perm money, Gone! My Tight-Spandex-Shirt Money, GONE!
everyone looks at Lance like they wish they didn’t know him.
La: sorry, I got a little carried away.
Jc: Yeah, whatever. Let’s just go home.
Jo: But I don’t wanna go! starts crying like a two-year old I’m Hungry! and I like it here…and, and it smells good, and…and I’M HUNGRY!!
Joey starts to cry on Chris’ shoulder, but is promptly pushed off, which makes him start to cry more.
Jc: JOEY! SHUT UP!
Everyone backs up, totally shaken by this. All the customers look at J.C. like he’s some crazy dope who will not be quiet.
Jo: trying to stop Yes sir.
Jc: once again calming himself down. to himself. It’s ok J.C., you can get some stuff later, wait till we get to the bus then it will all be better. to everyone What? Why are you all looking at me? Come on, we need to get ready for the show.
Jh: Bye Joey.
Su: See you later.
Jo: ~sniff~ Bye guys. ~sniff~ I’ll call you later.
Jc: Oh no you won’t!
J.C. pulls Joey away. A few tears run down Joey’s cheek, but he doesn’t make a sound. He waves goodbye and goes out the door. Chris and Justin seem to be in a hurry, Lance still looks hurt.
When they get back to the bus, Chris and Justin rush inside straight to the game system. J.C. heads for the back and slams the door behind him. Joey slumps on the couch and Lance goes over to him.
La: coldly How could you do this to me?! You know I was saving up to get that pink bedroom set. How
can you be so…so irresponsible!
Lance puts his hands over his face as he runs to the bathroom. He can be heard sobbing over the video game.
Ch: Dang he’s a sissy! Sometimes I wish I could just smack him, but I was brought up not to hit girls.
Ju: Yeah dowg, sometimes It would be rad just to be like, smack, smack! But then J.C. gonna smack he
hell outta me, that aint cool.
J.C. comes out of the back, wiping what looks like white powder off his nose. He starts furiously beating on the bathroom door.
Jc: LANCE! WILL YOU SHUT UP! Can’t you go 15 min. WITHOUT CRYING! I’m about to take a
nap!
La: Well it’s not my fault! Without the money to get the pink bedroom set, Topanga won’t believe me. I
just want her to go away! I’m not into her kind anymore, you know that.
Jc: gently at first Lance, everyone knows that. soon you’ll have enough money to get the set, and then
WE MIGHT ALL GET SOME QUIET! quickly turning around AND JOEY GET AWAY FROM
THE FRIDGE!
Joey almost falls to the floor, but catches himself on the fridge shelves. Thus knocking various things all over the floor.
Ch: Dude! Shut up, I can’t hear the music. J.C. quickly turns and glares at him nevermind.
Jc: Justin, do you have anything to ad to this game of Piss-J.C.-Off-More?
Justin slurs out a three minute long line of unidentifiable ebonics at 57 mph.
When he stops the bus is silent. The only sounds being made are the video game and him catching his breath. Everyone just stares at him.
Jc: clicking back into reality Whatever that was, you’re gonna be sorry for it later. AND THAT GOES
FOR ALL OF YOU!!
J.C. slams his was back to the back part of the bus.
Everyone else is still silent and staring at J.C. door.
Ch: damn. hearing music AH! Our game!
Ju: Dude! Oh well, Come on old man, I’ll beat your ass at a new game.
Ch: What are you talking about. I was winning.
Ju: In your dreams grandpa.
Ch: Oh, the baby wanna make something out of it?
Ju: BRING IT ON FO’!
Justin and Chris get into an arguing/wrestling/gaming war, not realizing the noise they are making. Joey realizes as he goes as far to the front of the bus as he can. Lance realizes, and the faint click of the bathroom lock can faintly be heard.
And then it happened
Jc: from the back room OK! THAT’S ENOUGH!! YOU HEARD ME THE FIRST TIME!