Sit here by the fireplace. Grab a pillow or two.
Comfy?
I am a 52 year old transgendered person, and proud of it.
I have five adult children who know but don't quite understand.
Their father was so masculine.
I was the dad other kids always looked up to.
But I was not honest with them.
Trust has been tarnished.
I am that same person they have always known.
I am the same person women still flirt with.
However, my perception of life,
and my part in it has expanded.
So has my wardrobe, and the way I now wish to be seen.
My wife for years allowed me to discover myself.
We even shopped together!!!
Bras, dresses, shoes, jewelry, "nighties", makeup, etc.
Now she really struggles with the "new" me.
Why?
Guess what happened?
One day I had no clean underwear.
So, the wife offers a pair of hers.
Well, we find a pair that fits.
Off to work I go.
All I could think of was "panty line"!
Everyone would know!
Well the day ended without incident.
I had clean underwear the next day.
Life went on its merry 'ol way.
Wait a minute.
Panties?
I remember that feeling looonnnngggg ago.
Well, sweetie, let me tell you!
After 10 years of marriage, a part of me began to
For some reason I had blocked
out my early childhood of dressing up.
Slowly.
Over time.
Cobwebs were removed.
My inner eye remembered.
Gee!
No one told me to put on dresses at age 3 or 4.
I told my self that's what I liked.
Blocked out, too, were my adolescent years of "dressing up".
Mom's old girdle.
Stockings, panties and slips!!!!! Oh My!!
Dorothy, don't click your heels yet.
This is real!!!
This is home!!!
This is were my heart belongs!!!
That was my secret self.
Now I remembered!! with a little help from therapist Sara.
Finally, the obligatory visit to "fix" the hubby.
Looking back I can see that I have always been
transgendered.
My childhood included house play with my sisters!
I would wear my mother's silky robe and fancy slippers.
My sisters had their own. I had to borrow.
The three of us would play with paper dolls. Dress them up.
Hopscotch. Jump rope. Jacks. What fun!
My boy firends would come over,
and we would run off and play
war, cops and robbers, sports, etc.
I enjoyed my friends. We did guy things. Cool.
But playing house with the girls was nice too.
Well!!
Now, I want to be "femme" more and more.
Large stuffed toys are adorable.
I want to sleep on the "right" side of the bed.
I don't like that fabric, dear. I like this fabric!
You are wearing my favorite undies. No I'm not!
Their mine. I picked them out. Remember?
"I'm the real woman around here.", she would say.
That maybe true, but I think you would look better if..."
I guess there's only room for one "woman in the house".
Like so many transgendered households
we have now separated.
Still married.
BUT
we just have a heap of issues that separate us.
So don't think my transgenderedness is the reason.
It's not.
I hope I'm not boring you dearest.
There are so many other stories to share.
I even write poetry
to release and discover my feelings.
Undoubtedly you have the same feelings
and emotions as the rest of us.
Becoming is my single life.
You have been so sweet to visit with me.
Sign my guestbook, please.
Let me visit you!
We can do our nails while we talk.
