Chapter 5: "But He's A--Oh."

Hatake Kakashi was pissed. Well, perhaps not pissed; it was his duty as a Jounin to come whenever the Hokage called, after all. Even if she called right as he was slipping into a nice warm bubble bath, the latest volume of Come Come Piracy in his hands. No, he was perfectly happy to answer the door in only a towel and mask and trek halfway across town just so he could wait at the Hokage’s leisure. Perfectly happy.

So he was becoming a crotchety old man. He figured that after dealing with Naruto, Sasuke and Sakura for four years, and especially this latest fiasco, he deserved it.

He wished he’d remembered to bring his book, or that the tiny waiting room had some magazines to read, or something. He dug around in his pouch, hoping he’d brought a crossword puzzle or something. He found something infinitely better: Come Come Paradise, Volume Four. Definitely his favorite of the series. He grinned beneath the mask and opened it to the first page.

Of course, that was the moment Kotetsu chose to stick his head out of the Hokage’s office. “Hatake Kakashi?” he said, cowering a little when Kakashi slammed the book shut and glared at him. “The Hokage will see you now.”

Kakashi stood and walked through the door. He briefly thought about showing Kotetsu “1000 Years of Pain,” but decided it was punishment enough that the man was Tsunade’s errand boy. Kotetsu closed the door behind him, and Kakashi stood at attention in front of the Hokage.

“At ease,” she said, seated behind her desk. Kakashi relaxed and took a seat in a nice cushy chair right in front of her. Not that he’d been offered it, but he figured he deserved it for being punctual for once.

“You’re probably wondering why I called you here on such short notice,” she started, rubbing her temples.

“I am,” Kakashi answered. “You said it was an emergency; what’s going on?”

“It concerns one of your students.”

Kakashi gripped the chair. As annoying as they could be, he really did like and care for his students. What could have happened? Could Sakura have fallen ill? Could Naruto have messed up another jutsu, this time with deadly results? Could Sasuke have left the village again?

He desperately hoped it was anything but that last one. Sasuke had been forgiven the last time he’d gone missing, as he was young and in pain. Now, however, no mercy would be shown, especially in light of his previous transgressions.

“Which one?” he asked, somehow managing to sound nonchalant. The Hokage took a deep breath.

“It’s Naruto,” she said.

“What about him?”

“There... seem to have been a few effects from his transformation that we didn’t consider before.”

“Effects?”

“He seems to be pregnant.” Kakashi stared at her for a moment, then burst out laughing. Tsunade watched as he slowly got ahold of himself, absolutely stone-faced.

“G-Good one, Hokage-sama,” he chuckled. He let his last few giggles out and looked at her expectantly. “What is it really?”

“That is it, Kakashi,” she said. Kakashi blinked.

“No, really, what is it?” he asked. “A joke is a joke, but I’m getting kind of worried here.”

“I told you,” she said, starting to sound peeved, “Naruto is pregnant.”

“But that’s impossible, right? I mean, even if he was having sex--which I don’t think he is--he can’t get pregnant. He’s a--oh.” He raised his eyebrows.

“That’s what I meant by unexpected effects,” Tsunade said, rising from her chair and pacing around. “And it doesn’t stop there.”

“It... doesn’t?”

“While I was examining him today, I felt a strange chakra,” she said. Kakashi nodded.

“The demon fox,” he said. Tsunade nodded as well and went back to her pacing.

“You are aware that, over the past sixteen years, the demon fox’s chakra has been being absorbed into Naruto’s own?” At Kakashi’s affirmative, she continued. “It appears that the remaining chakra isn’t mixing with Naruto’s. Instead, it is separating.”

Kakashi felt himself go cold as the implications of that statement hit him.

“Oh shit,” he said.

“Oh shit, indeed.” Tsunade rubbed her eyes and sat back down. “I can reseal the demon if needed, but I’m worried about the effects it could have on Naruto, especially if he’s pregnant.”

Kakashi nodded slowly. Not only was there a chance of killing the baby, there was also a chance that the baby would be irrevocably changed by the opposing chakras swirling through its... well, he guessed “mother” was the appropriate term, but he really hated applying the term to someone he knew to be male. Irrevocably changed, perhaps resulting in another overpowered demon child like Naruto himself. Or--he shuddered internally at the thought--Gaara of the Desert.

He met Tsunade eyes and knew she was thinking the same things he was. “Well, what do we do?” he asked. Tsunade sighed.

“We have two options,” she said, “wait for the baby to be born, and risk the demon fox becoming too powerful for Naruto to handle, or seal it now and risk the creation of another monster. An abortion at this stage would be too risky, in my opinion--the physical and emotional effects on Naruto could be just as disastrous as a failed birth. I wanted to talk it over with you first, as you are Naruto’s teacher and know him best. Can he, in your opinion, contain the demon fox, even while pregnant?”

Kakashi thought it over for a minute--despite training Naruto for four years, he’d only ever seen the demon fox’s chakra force itself to the surface four or five times, even when Naruto himself was at his weakest.

“I think we should wait,” he said. “Naruto was able to hold the demon fox in, even as an infant. I’m sure that if he’s informed of the risks, he’ll be able to handle it.”

Tsunade nodded. “He has already been informed,” she said. “Thank you, Kakashi, you can go now.”

Kakashi stood and saluted, then headed towards the door. Before he exited the office, though, Tsunade spoke.

“Kakashi. Wait. I forgot something.” He turned around.

“The information you have received about the demon fox is confidential,” she said. “You are only to discuss it in the company of other Jounin, and then only if you are sure you are not being eavesdropped upon, and only after I’ve called a general meeting to discuss it. I don’t want anyone to panic. The consequences of the actions they may take may be disastrous in this situation.”

Kakashi saluted again, then left, his head spinning like a madman’s. He needed something to distract himself from the shocking news, and it looked like simple reading wasn’t going to do it. That thought in mind, he left the Hokage’s house and headed towards the nearest bar.