Breathe, she commanded herself, fists knotted in her lap, eyes trained on the passing scenery. Breathe or they'll know something's up.
Beside her, Soshiki coughed into his fist and folded his arm across his stomach, his other arm draped along the back of the seat. His knees were jammed against the back of Pan's seat, legs akimbo. He was laughing at something Pan had said, his eyes shut and his mouth curled into an open smile. His brother was chuckling quietly, forearms draped lazily on top of the steering wheel as he sank into the fuzzy seat cover. Tatsuki's brown eyes were trained on the road, occasionally flickering to Pan beside him or to the rearview mirror and his brother. Pan was trying to make the best of the situation, sitting sideways and facing Tatsuki so that she didn't have her back to anyone.
Their laughter was genuine and the conversation was easy, but the atmosphere of the car was strained. There was something that they were all talking around.
Bra knew that they were talking around what was wrong with her.
Tree, tree, tree, tree... she chanted, listing off whatever was flying by her window. Her head hurt. Her eyes ached. She wanted to strangle something.
"You mean Old Man Wantanabe almost caught you?" Soshiki was saying, his hand tapping out some rhythm on the seat back behind her head. His fingers occasionally caught her hair, playing with the strands as if he were strumming a guitar.
How the hell long had he been doing that?
"Yeah, it was pretty embarrassing," Pan admitted, pulling off the blue bandana that Trunks had given her years ago. She'd worn her hair in pigtails again, but she'd tied them in little knots so that the ends of her black hair splayed upwards and stuck up behind her head. Bra smiled at her friend's reflection in the glass; ever since she'd started to take the time, she'd found some really cute styles.
"You're a bad influence on her, Big Brother," Soshiki laughed, sitting forward and resting his arm along the back of Pan's seat, pulling the other away from Bra and draping it across his knees. "Teaching her to play computer games in class."
"Weren't you the one who taught her how to slack off?" Tatsuki countered, reaching over and pulling the bandana away from Pan and ducking his head through it, tucking the knot under his nose. Pan laughed.
Tree, tree, tree, tree, dead skunk, tree, tree, tree... She was close to hyperventilating-Trunks had always done the same thing when he'd baby-sat them. Bwa ha ha, such delicious morsels I've stolen, he'd always said. Although that one looks spoiled and this one would probably be a little tough...oh well, slaves! Do my bidding!
Tree, tree, tree, tree...
"Nah," Soshiki laughed, tugging on the silver stud in his right ear before leaning back, setting his head near her shoulder. "B'd already taught her that. Didn'tcha BB?"
She growled, shoving his head as far away from her as her arm was long.
"Actually, Bra's always paid better attention than I have," Pan informed them in a matter-of-fact tone, as if proud of it. "Probably because she was never home schooled. Although she does have this tendency to sleep through math lately..."
Bra could feel the sick and twisted grin spreading across the face of her nemesis.
"Reeeeeeeally..."
"Mmhmm. She was asleep when Wantanabe almost caught me, actually. She usually plays look out for me when I'm goofing off."
"Awww," Soshiki cried, turning to face her with eyes that seemed to sparkle with fatherly pride. "BeeBee was asweep! I'm so pwoud!"
Tree, tree, tr...what the fuck did he just say?!
She whirled, baring her teeth at him as his eyes shone at the prospect of another one of their duels.
"Yeah, like you obviously were when you last got your hair done," she spat, crossing her arms over her chest. "The only blonds I know with electric green streaks are on the swim team."
"We have a swim team?" he replied, raising an eyebrow, a silver ring glinting against blond hair and pale skin.
"Yeah, I'm on it," she replied.
"Oooh, wait, that'd be the club with the gay guys in Speedos, right? That you joined just because you'd have an excuse to wear nothing?"
She snarled, knuckles cracking as she made choking motions with her hands. "I seem to remember you cheering me on during those swim meets."
He shrugged and leaned forward, draping an arm over her shoulder, whispering into her ear just loud enough so that the others could hear. "I'll tell you a secret-you may want to suggest to the coach that someone fix the pool heater. You girls sure do get cold during those matches."
"WHAT?!"
"Ooo," Pan laughed from the front seat. Tatsuki bit his lip and sniggered, his nose still upturned by the bandana knot.
Soshiki sat there and grinned at her like the pervert he was. She threw him off of her.
"You know, now that I think about it, maybe green does suit you. More proof that you're a lecherous, pervert halfbreed flunkie and that spending time with you is toxic to one's mental health."
"Well, at least it isn't permanent. Unlike yours. You'll be forever marked as the Queen Bringer of Blue Balls."
Bra's mouth dropped open and she froze, one finger raised in the air before her. She didn't have a comeback! Normally, she'd have a comeback for this! It was an easy one, left wide open! All she had to do was ask how he knew that, that she did it just for him, but it was too late! She'd missed it!
Soshiki seemed to be waiting for her to respond, and came to the same conclusion that she had: she was off. Something had twiddled with the connections in her brain and added five seconds of lag between receiving and responding.
"I thought I broke you," he mumbled to himself. She blinked, confused.
"What?"
"Forget it," he sighed, falling back into his former position: one arm draped over his stomach, the other along the back of the seat. He turned his face to the window, eyes straying to the snow-covered trees whizzing past. "Your heart's not in this. Consider this a draw."
She ground her teeth, glaring daggers at the back of his head as his fingers went back to playing with her hair. When he continued to ignore her, she snorted in contempt and snapped her head around to look out her own window.
"Shiki's right, Lady Bra," Tatsuki piped up quietly, pulling Pan's bandana down around his neck. "You just aren't yourself today. What's going on in that blue head of yours? You ok?"
Panic swirled around in her gut and she tried to squelch the feeling. "I'm fine," she replied, a little too quickly for any of them to believe her. She cringed at her own voice, twisting to face Tatsuki in the side mirror and tell him again. But the sight of him wearing her brother's old kerchief like that rendered her paralyzed and she whipped her head to stare back out her window, breathing like a caged animal. They'd never let her live it down if they found out what she'd done to Trunks. The bastard next to her especially-he'd use it as ammunition against her until the day she ripped off his arms, his legs from his torso and his vocal chords out of his neck. And even then...
Pan wouldn't believe her, and then, once she did, she'd kill her. She'd-
No-wait. Pan would be absolutely ecstatic. She'd had a crush on Trunks for years; she'd see this as her golden opportunity and would completely forget about Tatsuki. Which might possibly be for the better, but the guy was too decent and nice to deserve that. The guy opened her door for her and Bra both whenever they got into and out of his car! Besides, she had to find a way to turn her brother back, which meant that-
"Bra? Bra, you ok?" Pan was worried. Her blue eyes were scrutinizing her. Shit! She knew! She knew-or at least she thought she knew. She knew something was wrong.
Bra's hands went clammy.
"Fine!" she cried frantically, her voice trapped in her throat, which had closed off so much that she felt like she was trying to yell through a straw. "I'm fine! Fine-I'm fine! I'm fine-fine. Just fine."
Great, she was freaking out. This was not the time for this. Hadn't she already freaked out on her brother? No. No, that had been testing the water to tell if her wish had come true. Every hair on the back of her neck was standing on end; her heart was beating so fast that she was sure it would explode any second now. She did not need reality to set in right now. No. She'd get home and her mother would have figured out how to turn him back and everything would be perfectly ok again.
But what if they couldn't turn him back? Shit! She didn't need this, not now! Not now, not here, not with the halfbreed flunkie watching her. Not with-shit. They were watching her! Her heart beat harder; she couldn't even hear her blood rushing through her temples any longer. She'd gone deaf!
"I really do think I may have scrambled her with that snowball," she heard Soshiki mumble. Or did she read his lips? He was talking to himself again, he did a lot of that. That was it! She'd lost her mind and could hear the voices he was always talking to! Oh no. It was over! She was over! Wait...she couldn't hear him anymore, she was deaf! Or was he waiting for the voices to reply?
No, he was listening to something Pan was saying. Wai! She really was deaf! She flattened herself against the door, hyperventilating.
They knew! They had to know! How could they not know? One look at her and there was no denying it! Her life was ruined!
She had to find a way to turn her brother back to normal. Like, now. She'd pray-yes, pray. Pray and hope and wish and dream, isn't that what had gotten her into this mess? That was it! She'd wish! She'd wish really really hard! Clenching wild blue eyes shut, she made a fervent demand from whatever devil had wrought this on her wonderful existence that he take it back. Did it work? She opened her eyes again and looked around the car.
All three of them were staring at her like she'd just grown an arm from her forehead. They knew! She'd wished to the wrong God, and he'd let them hear! Oh no, what if she had wished out loud? She wouldn't ever know if she had-she couldn't even hear the engine or the radio. They knew! They knew and they were going to kill her! The halfbreed would kill her for hurting his brother, his brother would hurt her from taking Pan away from him, and Pan would kill her for not doing this ages ago!
She clapped her hands over her broken ears, swaying back and forth as the inability to hear began to affect her balance. It was over, she was over. She'd be incarcerated, forced to make shoes in China with the starving children for minimal wages! She'd never get to wear designer jeans again, never feel the sheen of lipgloss across her lips...
"WAAAAAAAAI!" she cried, the pitch of her own voice piercing through her hysteria. She could hear? She could hear! She wasn't deaf! But wait...that meant...that meant that she could hear them now...that meant that...
"What's going on, Bra?" the halfbreed was demanding. His brother was looking at her nervously, chattering on about how they understood and would be there for her.
It meant that she had to face the music, had to admit to everything.
"Bra, Bra are you sick?" Pan asked worriedly.
Bra shook her head wildly, fighting her way from her seatbelt and pinning herself against the door behind her. Oh Gods, oh Gods oh Dende, they knew! Her vision blurred as she clawed at the seat cushion, clawing at the door behind her, searching for the handle that dug into the small of her back.
"I'm fine! I'm fine!" she cried. The three passed skeptical glances at each other and then the halfbreed unbuckled his seatbelt, bracing his hand and a knee on the seat between then, leaning forward towards her. She screamed, planting a foot in the middle of his chest and shoving him away from her, whirling and fighting with the doorknob, turning it around and around-why wouldn't it open? She could feel the cold air, but she was still trapped inside.
Dammit! Why'd her life have to turn out like this? How come her brother at the very least couldn't have turned into the big baby he was? Then they could just pass him off as a new little brother! Or better yet, how come he couldn't have turned into a grapefruit? She liked grapefruit, there was nothing wrong with grapefruit.
GRAPEFRUIT COULDN'T RUIN HER LIFE, DAMMIT ALL TO HELL!!!
The handle wouldn't turn any more and she looked up, startled as hell to find the window open. Freedom! Escape! She scrambled through it, feeling a hand clasp around her ankle. In desperation, she kicked out, meeting something solid, something that gave but that didn't seem to want to give. The others cried out as she tumbled out into the snow, crawling through it desperately, unable to get her feet under her to find purchase.
"God dammit, get back here, Bra!" the halfbreed roared. Behind her the door flew open. She shrieked and whirled, flinging snow at him before getting her feet under her and stumbling through the snow in leaps.
Her brother was lying in the snow-she had to bury him, cover him up before the others saw. Hide him until she could fix this. That was it! She'd just hide it! She'd hide everything!
Her vision blurred as she heard car doors slam behind her and heavy footsteps slamming through the delicate snow. She staggered, pressing her hands to her eyes. Arms flung themselves around her and she shrieked, fighting them off. Breathe they said. The disembodied arms hauled her back against a tree. A very warm tree. Just breathe, Bra, come on, it's alright...
The tree spoke quietly into her ears as the arms very slowly loosened around her middle. She breathed in when it told her to, out when it had decided she had enough air in her lungs. She kept her eyes closed, unable to face the reality she had plunged herself into.
"Come on, Bee," she heard the halfbreed murmur into her ear, the arms around her pulling away, steady and gentle hands lighting firmly on her shoulder as they rubbed the tight kinks from her neck. "You'll be alright, just breathe… Pan!" he called over his shoulder, his voice moving away from her. "Melt some snow-if she eats it like it is she'll only get dehydrated."
Bra swallowed thickly, slowly returning to herself, the easy repetition of Soshiki's thumbs rubbing the nape of her neck bringing her back to herself, his voice a tentative link with reality. Her panic subsided, her mind clearing. Detachment settled back over her mind, the full extent the day's actions seeping in through the cracks that her hysteria had chipped into her psyche. Adrenalin ran through her veins, her whole body quivering as the pent up energy tried to find some way out.
"You ok now?" Soshiki asked quietly, his hands brushing against the sides of her face, pulling back blue hair that hung wildly in her eyes. He knotted it into his fist, the tension a welcome relief. She opened her eyes slowly, clenching them quickly shut as the world swung in and out of focus and spun around her.
She swallowed thickly, her gorge rising as Soshiki's fingers glissed her cheeks again for stray strands of hair. Her body flung her forward into the snow as her throat struggled to keep back the bile, pulling him in a mad dive after her. Hot and pungent bile burned the back of her mouth and coated her tongue, made her eyes tear as she caught her self with her hands. Soshiki stumbled, trying not to step on her or to yank her hair from her scalp.
She trembled, her stomach gave one last heave, and she dry retched into the snow.
One of the worst tastes in the world was eggs. He liked eggs, but when they decided to come back up and revisit his taste buds, they ranked down there with-judging by the smell-the flavor of dog shit.
One knee planted heavily into the snow, the other supporting his upper body as he crouched in an awkward position, half straddling her and half behind her, he was very much regretting the choice of breakfast he'd made that morning. Tatsuki made eggs that could rock one's world, but when he begged his brother to make them, things like this usually tended to happen.
Her upper body heaved below him and he struggled to keep the contents of his own stomach where they belonged-in his digestive track. He was just happy that she didn't seem to have had anything in her stomach to begin with; he was a sympathetic spewer. The last thing he needed to do was barf in her hair.
Clenching shut his eyes, he breathed deeply, gently winding her hair around his fist and rubbing her back, focusing his attention only on the tension in her shoulders. After a few minutes, the terrible gagging noise stopped, followed by coughing and spitting.
"You ok, now?" he asked softly, watching as she lifted a hand, pulling away the stray strands of hair that clung to her cheeks. "Or is there still something in there?"
She didn't say anything, only coughed violently towards the snow, her voice hoarse and eyes clenched shut.
Pan ran up beside them as he tempted God and wrapped his arms around Bra's middle, gently pulling her against him and helping her to her feet. She trembled violently, as if she hadn't been finished, but made no move that she still had friends for the snow. He held her against his chest, waiting for her to get her legs back, trying his best to ignore the eggish bile that coated the back of his throat.
"Feeling better?" Pan asked quietly as she handed the pale and sweating girl an empty soda can full of melted snow. Bra shook her head weakly, and he shuffled them around so that she could see the face of the worried girl, but explicitly so that he could kick snow over her mess. Pan's eyes were anxious as she studied Bra's face. The two locked gazes and, knowing Pan, she was making a silent promise that they would talk about this later.
"Where's Tats?" he sighed, running a hand back through his hair, looking around worriedly for his older brother.
"Digging through the trunk for some blankets," Pan replied as she swept hair from her friend's eyes, Bra taking slow, small sips from the can, cupping it tightly between her hands like a warm cup of cocoa. "He's already pulled out the first aid kit."
"He shouldn't be out here," Soshiki muttered disapprovingly, looking across the expanse of snow that was still very disturbed from Bra's frantic flight and his pursuit. Absently, he held a hand to his forehead, wiping away what he could of the blood that was starting to freeze against his temple. Damn that girl could kick.
"We're not too far from the hot springs," Pan soothed, rubbing a warm hand against Bra's shoulder. "Besides, it's not like him to just sit and watch you get the shit beaten out of you."
Soshiki snorted quietly, happy that Bra hadn't slammed her shoe into his nose. He stooped his shoulders and turned his head, peering into her dulled eyes. "Gonna be sick again?"
She shook her head and moved to stand on her own, but her knees were still shaky and she teetered. He and Pan moved to catch her before she could faceplant into the mess she'd made in the snow, supporting her between them.
"I'm fine," Bra mumbled, lifting a shivering hand to touch her forehead. "I'm just..."
Trusting Pan to hold her, he shrugged out of his jacket, the worn, silk-lined leather sliding from bare arms, down into his fists. The cold air attacked him viciously, tearing at the shirtsleeves he'd rolled up to his shoulders, pulling angrily at the hair on his arms. Gently, ignoring the cold as he usually did, he draped the jacket over Bra's shoulders, taking the soda can from her so that she could get her arms through the sleeves. A kind of bewilderment passed over her face as she complied, looking up at him, her eyes completely lost. Gently, he stooped, bracing an arm against her back and tucking the other under her knees, lifting him against his chest. She started and her eyes flew open, her hand sweeping almost instinctively towards his head.
"I'm perfectly capable of walking on my own," she spat as her palm connected with his cheek, her voice weak, most of the fire still gone from her voice. He took the slap without shame, letting her hit him in full.
There's her spark, he laughed silently to himself, privately gloating in the fact that he'd successfully goaded her at least once today. She'd been off ever since he'd pegged her with that snowball, bright white snow falling from a pale face that didn't seem to realize where, when, or what the hell she was.
"No brother in his right mind would let his sister stand shivering in the snow when there's a nice warm car less than a dozen paces away," he laughed gently, following the halo of light reflecting off of Pan's hair as she walked to his brother's Hyundai. "And your brother is one of the last people on Earth I would ever want riding my ass for not taking care of you."
She stiffened immediately, panic rising back into her eyes. He froze and dropped to one knee in the snow, not quite sure if he should lower her back to the ground or carry her back towards the trees. The panic that rose in her eyes at the mention of her brother was practically contagious and his eyes shot to his own brother, who was hopping lightly in place beside the car, blowing into his fists as he waited to open the door for him. Pan stood beside him, trying to convince him to wrap one of the blankets around himself.
Soshiki breathed a sigh of relief; his brother only looked a little worse for wear, his nerves probably frazzled from the scare Bra had given them. But his face didn't look ragged, and he obviously still had energy enough to bounce around like that, knowledge that assuaged the fear that had risen in his chest. Beside him, Pan looked absolutely terrified.
"I don't think she's ever seen her act like this," he mumbled absently, his eyes searching Pan's face for some hint of what to do.
"I don't think I've ever seen me like this."
He blinked, turning his eyes back to Bra, who was huddled as small as she could make herself in his arms. There was a profound guilt in her blue eyes that he knew well, one that he knew better than to probe into, no matter how much he wanted to know what was going on.
"Are you sure you're ok, B?" he asked her quietly, rocking back onto his heal and getting both feet back under him. She nodded simply, offering him a meek "Just problems at home" with an ironic smile. He supplied a grim half grin as he moved forward and set her in the car, nodding to his brother to close the door.
"Shiki, you ride in back with her," Pan ordered. "It'll make it easier for me to clean your wound if I'm the one sitting backwards."
He nodded as she moved around to the other side of the car, standing beside his brother in the cold. Tatsuki sneezed quietly.
"You shouldn't be out here," he chided as her door closed. Tatsuki sighed.
"I'm fine, Little Brother. I'm more worried about Bra."
Soshiki nodded and raked a hand back through his hair, briefly meeting his brother's eyes. Tatsuki's hair hung over his face and he raised a hand to bat it aside, as Soshiki looked down through the window at the girl who was huddling against the door, probably freezing right now. Soshiki was glad Tats had taken the time to roll the window back up while the girl was liberating her breakfast.
"One of the three of us is going home with her tonight," he grumbled sternly. "I won't stand for her brother to let something bother her this badly."