No such semi-steam sitch plagues Angelina Jolie and Antonio Banderas in Original Sin, which opens August 3.

Way back observers of the uncut version of Original tell me it was basically two-plus hours of heavy (pubic) petting and some sort of plot.

Something about a man falling into the lusty lair of a mysterious woman, I think. Do we really need any more explanation with such sultry stars?

"It's still very hot," said an Original vet. "Angelina's body is magnificent."

Hey! What about the dude's bod?

"It's pretty good, too," replied the source. "Although, you don't get to see as much of his body--just him going at her all the time."

Uh-oh. Just dawned on me that Melanie Griffith considers herself quite the Web weaver...You're not online now, are ya, doll?

In case you are, I'm gonna clean up this item a bit and inform everybody that Original's makeup artists and electronic elves had their work cut out for them big time.

"They couldn't get all the tattoos completely covered," explained an Original makeup source. "So, they had to do it digitally."

Also on Ms. J.'s sumptuous natural sheath were other blemishes, I'm told, that needed nixing. But I'm too much of a gossip (surely you didn't think I was going to say gentleman, did you?) not to torture you and let you postulate on just what those imperfections might have been.

However, I trust you're already on the right track.

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