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What does it all mean? There's no particular roadmap to a happy love life, but we have to be able to see the signs and read the signals that help us handle the situations we encounter.
Here's some ideas to keep you headed down the road to happiness...
| Speed Limit 35 |
Sometimes you have to take it slow for awhile. |
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| Yield |
Remember, you're not always right. Your partner may have a valid opinion. |
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| Slippery When Wet |
Stay in control. Be cautious. |
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| Next Gas 50 Miles |
Be good to yourself.
Refuel your mind and body when you get a chance. |
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| Turn on Headlights |
Open your eyes. Look at things realistically. |
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| Highway Divides |
You have to make decisions.
Don't wait until it's too late and you've made commitments. |
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| Stop Ahead |
Prepare yourself for minor (and major) setbacks. |
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| Dangerous Curves |
Even if it looks good, it may not be the best thing for you. |
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| Merging Traffic |
There's alot of us struggling down this highway.
Watch out! Avoid accidents! The other man/woman? |
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| No Left Turn |
The easiest path is not always an option.
A more difficult path may bring you greater rewards |
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Submit your translation of a roadsign!
Men's Thesaurus
1. "I'M GOING FISHING"
Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
2. "IT'S A GUY THING"
Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical".
3. "CAN I HELP WITH DINNER?"
Means: "Why isn't it already on the table?"
4. "UH HUH," "SURE, HONEY," OR "YES, DEAR..."
Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
5. "IT WOULD TAKE TOO LONG TO EXPLAIN"
Means: "I have no idea how it works."
6. "I WAS LISTENING TO YOU. IT'S JUST THAT I HAVE THINGS ON MY MIND."
Means: "I was wondering if that redhead over there is wearing a bra."
7. "TAKE A BREAK HONEY, YOU'RE WORKING TOO HARD".
Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
8. "THAT'S INTERESTING, DEAR."
Means: "Are you still talking?"
9. "YOU KNOW HOW BAD MY MEMORY IS."
Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first
girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
10. "I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT YOU, AND GOT YOU THESE ROSES".
Means: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
11. "OH, DON'T FUSS, I JUST CUT MYSELF, IT'S NO BIG DEAL."
Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I
admit that I'm hurt."
12. "HEY, I'VE GOT MY REASONS FOR WHAT I'M DOING".
Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty soon."
13. "I CAN'T FIND IT."
Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely
clueless."
14. "WHAT DID I DO THIS TIME?"
Means: "What did you catch me at?"
15. "I HEARD YOU."
Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping
desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
16. "YOU KNOW I COULD NEVER LOVE ANYONE ELSE."
Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
17. "YOU LOOK TERRIFIC."
Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."
18. "I'M NOT LOST. I KNOW EXACTLY WHERE WE ARE."
Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."
19. "WE SHARE THE HOUSEWORK."
Means: "I make the messes, she cleans them up."
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