By Lisa R.
Chapter II
Kid's reaction completely stunned Lou. For a man who was renowned for his calm demeanor and fair judgement of others, the anger she saw rise in his eyes, the set of his jaw and the tone of his voice were something she hoped to never experience again.
Shouting loud enough to wake the dead, Kid looked at Lou and yelled, "You what!"
The words continued to tumble quickly from her mouth. "I'm sorry Kid. I really am. I should have told you before, but I just didn't know how."
His blood was boiling now, he was sure of it, and his hands had unknowingly clenched into tight, white-knuckled fists. So caught up in his rage was he, he didn't even notice Lou flinch away from him fearing he would strike her.
"You didn't know how! You didn't know how! Jesus Lou, how about, 'Hey Kid, guess what? You're not my first husband.' That would have worked just fine!"
Jumping up to move away from her, he was oblivious to their friends who now sat wide-eyed and awake on their bunks. Too shocked to say anything or do little more than stare, they all had the same thought running through their heads. Had Kid just said that Lou had been married before or were they just having a collective nightmare?
Kid bent to pull on his boots and grabbing his coat, hat and gun he headed for the door. He didn't know where he was going, but he had to get away from there. He couldn't believe this was happening to him! How could the woman he loved, the woman whom he trusted with his life, keep such a deep secret and betray their love like this?
Racing towards him, Lou tried to stop his retreat. Grabbing his sleeves, she begged him to listen. "Kid, please don't walk away! We need to talk about this."
His anger at her was growing by the minute. He knew he had to get away before he said anything to make the situation worse. He needed out and she was in his path. Grabbing her roughly and pulling free from her grasp, he pushed past her.
"Lou, stay out of my way! We don't need to talk about anything! I don't want to hear it. There is nothing you could say to me right now that would make this mess any better."
Fearing for Lou's safety, Jimmy hopped off his bunk and started towards the couple. He had never seen his best friend so angry, so ready to fight.
Throwing up his hand to stop Jimmy's approach, Kid's voice burned with anger. "Back off Hickok and stay out of this! It's got nothin' to do with you! Or any of you!" He swept his pointed finger around the room to ward off the rest of his friends as they rose from their bunks.
Lou started to cry in earnest. This shouldn't be happening! Where was the calm, serious, cool-headed Kid who she knew and loved? They should be talking and working this out, not fighting over it. She hardly recognized this furious man before her.
Kid opened the door and started out into the rain. Lou chased after him, back across the muddy yard, calling for him to stop and talk to her. "Kid! Kid! Don't walk away from me! Talk to me!"
Oblivious to the downpour, Kid never broke stride as he raced towards the stable with Lou close on his heels. The rest of the riders tumbled onto the porch just watching the wagon wreck occurring before them, unable to slow it's crashing momentum.
Fighting against the forceful wind and driving rain, Lou continued to shout after Kid. Her pleas for him to stop, falling on deaf ears. Their argument continued inside the stable as Kid rushed to saddle Katy.
"Kid please listen to me! Don't ride away from me! You promised in Davenport. You promised we would face any trouble together. We can get through this if you'll let me explain."
He remembered his promise as clearly as he remembered proposing to her, but right now that day was tarnished for him. "Lou, there's nothing to explain. I don't want to hear anything you have to tell me!"
"Kid, that's not fair," she screamed.
"Fair! You want to talk about fair as you stand there trying to explain away your deception. Lou, I can't believe you would do this to me, to us!"
Her voice caught in sobs, she struggled for control. "I swear I wanted to tell you before. It's been killin' me to not have you know, but it was another time, another life!"
"Listen to yourself, Lou. What about our time, our life? Didn't you think that I had the right to know that I would be your second husband? That someone had been in your bed before me!"
His verbal assault rocked Lou to her core and caused the color to drain from her face. She didn't even have the energy to properly slap him for the insult. Growing weary and full of remorse she let her head fall and her tears mix with the rainwater falling to the floor. Her voice cracked as she spoke. "Do you really believe that, Kid? That I would have lied to you about something that important?"
Kid mounted Katy and looked down at Lou. Even soaked to the bone and swollen from crying she was beautiful. He loved her, no matter what. He knew that, but his pride was hurt and his manhood was challenged and all he could do at this moment was ride away. Finally dropping his own voice, he spoke, "I don't know what I believe right now, Lou."
She stared up at him and pleaded with her eyes. She pleaded for him to stay and work this out with her. "I love you, Kid."
Throwing her own words at her, he snorted and rolled his eyes. "Yeah, you sure have a strange way of showing it." Turning back in the saddle, he gave Katy a kick and started out into the night.
Momentarily rooted to the spot where she stood, Lou clutched her heart as if Kid had actually reached inside of her and ripped it from her chest. She knew he was hurt, but she never realized he was so spiteful. Understanding it was deserved, in a way, she also understood she had to stop him, not let him leave angry. Chasing after him as he tore from the stable into the stormy night, she screamed his name and pleaded with him to stop. He rode on, without turning back.
Lou fell to her knees in the cool, dark mud beside the corral as Kid rode from sight. Suddenly feeling desperately alone and terrified for their future, she buried her face in her hands and let loose with a sickening wail. Oblivious to the pounding rain she rocked in the mud as sobs racked her tiny body. Kid had left her and she feared he would never come home again.
Woken by the commotion, Rachel and Teaspoon reached the bunkhouse in time to see Kid tear out of the stable and ride off.
"What in tarnation is going on out here. You boys are making enough noise to wake a hybernatin' bear!"
"It's not us, Teaspoon. It's them."
Teaspoon followed Noah's pointed finger and Kid and Lou came into his line of sight. He was stunned when he saw, the normally calm, Kid barrel away from the station and then he watched Lou fall to her knees in obvious emotional torment. His voice only slightly above a whisper, the normally reserved man was near tears. "Holy Mary, Mother of God. What is going on here?"
Cody was the only one who would dare to repeat what they had heard. With seriousness rarely seen, the normally jovial young man broke the bad news. "Lou's big secret is out. She's been married before."
Rachel gasped and clutched the porch rail to keep from fainting. So this was what had been tormenting the poor child, not wedding jitters! She could barely control her tears and allowed herself to be pulled into a steadying embrace by Buck who saw her shaking hands and pale face.
Hearing Lou's tortured wail, Rachel turned to Teaspoon and pleaded with him. "Teaspoon, go get her please! We can't leave her out in this rain."
"I'll get her, Rachel." Without another word, Jimmy charged into the rain and raced to Lou's side. He scooped her up, cradled her in his arms and pulled her close to his chest to try and shield her from the harsh wind. "Shhh…Don't cry sweetheart. We'll fix this, you'll see." Her pain was killing him. He couldn't fault Kid for riding out, he knew he probably would have done the same thing, but he hated to see Lou hurting like this.
Cody and Noah rushed to his side and helped Jimmy get Lou into Rachel's house. Hurrying her inside, Noah had to practically pry Lou's arms from around Jimmy's neck as Cody built up the fire. Curled into a ball on the sofa, like a frightened young child, the men could only stare at Lou as she cried an endless stream of tears. They felt at a loss as to what to do for their friend, for either of them. Rachel and Teaspoon hurried in and sent the boys on their way. They would take care of her for the night until they could make some sense of this muddy mess.
Joining Buck back in the bunkhouse they all sat at the table, afraid to go back to sleep.
"How is she?"
"How do you think, Buck? She's crying her eyes out."
"I was just asking, Jimmy. No need to get crazy on me."
"Sorry Buck, I know you didn't mean nothin' by it, I just can't believe it."
Noah traced his finger around a knot in the wooden table and asked his question without meeting any of his friends' eyes. "Did she really say married?"
"'Fraid so," answered Cody. "This just isn't right. When could Lou have been married? She would have been only fifteen or sixteen. We know what she's been up to for the last few years or so and we know she just turned eighteen."
"I don't know Cody, but whenever it was, she obviously never told the Kid." Jimmy shook his head at the fresh memory of how angry his friend was. He was almost embarrassed to speak the next words. "I thought he was gonna hit her."
Buck was shocked by his admission. "He'd never do that! Kid loves Lou. We all know he'd never hit anyone like that, not after what he went through growin' up."
"Buck, you didn't see her flinch? She thought it too. He was that upset. Now I don't think he would have done it on purpose, but man, he was crazy with anger right then and I just really thought it was coming."
"Thank god it didn't." Noah knew the Kid couldn't stand a man who would hit a defenseless person, especially a woman, and he knew that type of irrational and reckless behavior towards Lou would have killed him. "What are we gonna do about this?"
"Nothing." Jimmy looked up and stared all his friends directly in the eyes. "And I mean it. This is between Kid and Lou and they'll tell us when they're good and ready."
"What if he don't come back Jimmy, then what? We don't even know where he ran off to."
"Oh he'll be back, Cody Don't you worry. I'll find him and even if I have to drag him back here, hog-tied on a buckboard, he'll be back. Then they'll sort this out and everything will be back to normal. I will be walkin' Lou down the aisle on her wedding day!"
Shaking his head sadly, Noah spoke in agreement. "I hope so. We'd better get back to sleepin'. I figure we got at least one day of double duty ahead while they patch this up, maybe more."
Heading for the security of their warm, dry bunks each rider fell asleep thinking of their friends with their new knowledge that one of their family had a secret past.
Lou allowed Rachel to change her out of her soaking clothes and into a warm flannel nightgown, as if she were a helpless child. She heard Rachel's soothing voice crooning to her, but was unable to stop her crying long enough to focus on the words. She couldn't believe Kid was really gone. He never even looked back at her. What would she do now? Where would she go? Exhausted both physically and emotionally, she did not resist when Rachel guided her to the bed and covered her with several quilts to stop her shaking.
Lou immediately closed her eyes and prayed for sleep, if not death, to overtake her. She couldn't bear the thought that what had just happened was real and not a horrible nightmare. How would she live without him? He was what made breathing possible. Lying perfectly still she tried to convince herself that the bad dream would be gone by morning. She would wake up in the bunkhouse, wrapped in Kid's strong arms, and as the sun came up she would sneak back to her own bunk, just as she had done for the past several weeks, since their return from Davenport.
Hoping the whiskey she made Lou sip as a calming agent was taking its effect, Rachel sat down on the bed beside her and gently stroked the stray hairs away from her face. She was as pale as the cotton linens and buried deep in the bedding she looked so fragile. She didn't know what to say to Lou, how to make her stop hurting.
"Louise, you just rest now. We'll fix this in the morning."
Keeping her eyes closed and her voice just above a whisper, she spoke. "That's what Jimmy said."
"See, good minds think alike. Once the sun is up and you've both had a chance to calm down, you and Kid will talk and sort all this out."
Lou's heart tore in two as she listened to the false cheeriness Rachel was forcing into her voice. Even Rachel knew this was hopeless. Lou truly felt they would never work this out, but spoke only of the most immediate obstacle. "He's not coming back."
"What!" Rachel felt her heart skip several beats. "Did he tell you that?"
"No, he never said it, but I saw the way he looked. I heard his words. He won't be back."
"Now stop thinking like that. Kid would never leave you. He loves you!"
"Not anymore. He thinks I'm a whore. Actually worse, a deceitful whore."
"Louise! Kid doesn't think that of you!" Rachel didn't know how to go on. She knew neither the young woman's story or the heated words Kid had said in anger. "You two just need to talk this over and once you do, it will be okay. I believe that and so should you. Would it help you to talk about it with me? Maybe get it off your mind?"
Lou shook her head imperceptibly, keeping her eyes closed. She wanted to tell Rachel, anybody, just to know that they might tell Kid someday. She wanted to know that they would tell him the true story behind her hurried confession, but at the same time she knew she had to stick to her belief that he deserved to hear it from her, not second-handed. One day, some day, they would meet again and she would take the time to tell him the story. Fresh tears slipped from behind her heavy lids. "I'm sorry, Rachel. I can't tell you before him. It would make it worse. I'll wait to tell him."
Rachel nodded her answer without thinking of the fact that Lou couldn't see her through closed eyes. She rose to leave the room and the tortured girl to a rough night of sleep. As she bent over the nightstand to extinguish the lantern she couldn't resist asking Lou one last question. She had to know the truth first hand so she could better deal with this crisis. "Sweetheart, is what the boys told me true? Were you really married before you joined the express?"
The pain that flashed across Lou's tear-stained face was enough of a confirmation for Rachel, but her own tears started again as she saw Lou mouth a silent "Yes" before the room went dark.
Lou heard Rachel close the door and only then did she dare to open her eyes. Her mind was racing in a thousand directions and she wondered if this was what death felt like. She thought of the words she had wanted to use as well as the words that actually came out of her mouth to start this horrible sequence. She replayed their fight, she sobbed against the pillow reliving his insults, heard his rage over the thought that there had been a lover before him and finally she saw him ride away. There would be no sleep for her this night, only hours of lying as still as possible, waiting for a miracle.
Rachel thankfully took the coffee mug Teaspoon held out to her and wordlessly lowered herself to the sofa beside him. Sipping mindlessly, she stared into the fire.
"Is she sleeping?"
"I hope so, but I doubt it. Her eyes were closed when I left, but I know I wouldn't be able to sleep if it were me. Oh, Teaspoon! What are we gonna do?"
"I don't know what we can do, Rachel. Other than wait, that is. This is serious business, but we're talking about the Kid here and I believe he'll do the right thing."
"Louise isn't so convinced. She believes he's not coming back."
"Did he say that?"
"No, but she's devastated, Teaspoon. I'm guessing it was an ugly argument and combining that with his anger and actions, she thinks he's gone forever."
"Now that's not gonna happen. I'd bet my last dollar on the Kid coming back tomorrow. He's just smartin' right now and he's gone off to lick his wounds." Teaspoon took Rachel's hand in his own and held it tightly. "There will be a wedding, Rachel. I promise you that."
Rachel looked at him, this gruff, but kind man who cared for the riders as much, if not more than she did. Seeing the far away look in his eyes and the creases in his forehead, she knew this was hurting him as well, especially because it involved Lou. The spirited girl held a special place in the hearts of all the riders, but even more so Teaspoon.
"I want to believe you, Teaspoon. I really do, but I'm just not so sure. I've never seen Kid so mad! I would have expected this from Jimmy, maybe even Noah, or Louise herself if the situation were reversed, but never from the Kid! He's always rock-solid, a steady force you can count on."
Teaspoon contemplated Rachel's words. He agreed with her analysis, but tonight's trouble was a little different than a gun battle or making sure goodness prevailed. This involved Lou and when it came to her, Kid was often hard headed and irrational. "Did she tell you anything?"
"No. She wants to explain to the Kid first."
"Did she tell you if it's true?"
"Yes. It's true."
Teaspoon let Rachel's answer settle before speaking. "It's no wonder he rode out. This musta just tore him apart."
"Her too, you know."
"Of course, of course. I always knew there was more to our Lou than met the eye, but I never expected it to be this. Do you think she's hiding from him?
"From Kid?"
"No. From the other husband."
"Dear God! I never even thought of that." Rachel's mind flashed back to her own difficult past and found it incomprehensible that Lou was facing the same thing or worse. "I guess it's possible. It would explain some of her hesitation about dropping her disguise and becoming Louise in public, as well as why she became Lou in the first place. Yet, it still doesn't make sense. I don't think she would have accepted the Kid's proposal or gone on with the plans if she knew she couldn't marry him because of another husband."
"I know, she isn't the type to be dishonest on purpose. There's gotta be more, but we ain't gonna find out for a while. All we can do until then, is give her the strength she's missing right now and pray the Kid comes to his senses and comes home soon."
To Be Continued...Chapter Three
Copyright 1998-This work is not to be reproduced without the permission of the author
The Way Station
Campfire Tales
