Ramones

The Ramones, all normal guys who changed their last name to Ramone, are credited as the band that really started punk. The band consisted of vocalist Joey, guitarist Johnny, bassist Dee Dee, (later replaced by C.J., who wasn't nearly as good) and three drummers (though not all at once): Tommy, Marky, and Ritchie. Hailing from New York, the birthplace of bands like the MC5, Iggy Pop and the Stooges, the Velvet Underground, and the New York Dolls, they are vastly known for simplyfing their music to three chords and playing it really, really fast. They were supposed to sound like some sort of washed-up 50's band. Oh yeah, they also wore leather jackets and stood around like thugs all the time. The Ramones retired from the music scene after close to 20 years, while all their peers overdosed.

The Ramones (1976) 9 Thumbs Up

This is fast, simple, and lo-fi. It's the epitome of three-chord bashing, and for its time, people were shaken up. Rock 'n' roll was supposed to be 20 minute solos! Not this! I thank the Ramones for making this record, because as shoddy as mainstream rock is today, it would be much, much worse without the Ramones. Trust me on this, kids.

You can jump around like an idiot to nearly every song! We've got "Blitzkrieg Bop," which is played at nearly every single sporting event ever, ("Hey ho, let's go!") and all sorts of other great singles, like "Beat On The Brat," "Judy Is A Punk," and "53rd & 3rd!" They start emo with "I Wanna Be Your Boyfriend!" They start horror punk with "Chain Saw!" They talk politics in "Havana Affair!" They offend a lot of people by writing "Today Your Love, Tomorrow The World" about Nazis! They're so great, I've just used far too many exclamation marks! Wow! It's actually a good thing this site isn't very popular, or people would probably be disputing my above claims left and right, heh. But listen, the Ramones started something very important with this record. They were a huge influence on the music you listen to today, be it rock, punk, grunge, metal, whatever - you can probably trace it back somewhere to the Ramones. They wanted to pay a tribute to their heroes of the 50's, and here we are, trying to pay tribute to them. Oh, it's great. This is one o' them "essential albums."

Leave Home (1977) 9 Thumbs Up

This is where the Ramones really start to focus their 50's/60's rock and roll sound. There's still fast three-chord bashing; songs like "Glad To See You Go" (which is about Charlie Manson, and is my personal favourite Ramones song) and "Gimme Gimme Shock Treatment" both show their controversial sense of humour and could've been on the self-titled, except the production is far superior. And if you've been reading my other reviews, you know production is very important to me. What can I say, it's how I enjoy an album.

There's also "Sheena Is A Punk Rocker," one of those songs everyone thinks of when they think of the Ramones. It's actually there to replace "Carbona Not Glue," which was taken off when it turned out Carbona is copyrighted, and they didn't want their product to be associated with drugged-up teens. Oppression! If you can get "Carbona Not Glue," I'd recommend it. And a few tracks later is "Suzy Is A Headbanger!" Do you sense a theme? There are some other notable tracks, like "Pinhead," that gave their fans the cry "Gabba gabba hey!" a cover of "California Sun," the pro-US troops "Commando," and even a parody of 50's rock, "You're Gonna Kill That Girl." The Ramones could do it all, without stretching their songs out to 6 minutes. More bands need to listen to them.

Rocket to Russia (1977) 8 Thumbs Up

Everyone says this is the Ramones' best album, but I didn't think it was as good as the other two. Please don't hang me. I just don't like the production - the guitars are too heavy to get their lo-fi sound from the past records, but not heavy enough to be anything more. Despite this flaw, it's still catchy and fun. They look like tough guys on the front, but if you take the time to listen to the album, it's actually closer to 60's bubblegum pop than to hard 70's rock.

Anyway, this album is more of the Ramones' classic sound. It's very similar to the past two albums. We've got slower songs like "Ramona," pop like "Teenage Lobotomy," and of course, classics like "Sheena Is A Punk Rocker" and "We're A Happy Family." It's just as catchy as ever, although a bit darker. They continue to show their macabre sense of humour, but I just felt like it was more of the same-old, same-old. It was already done on their past two records, just with low-fi production. Of course, what this CD really has going for it is that it's very tongue-in-cheek. The Ramones were being hailed as some sort of social movement, so they set out to prove that they were just a bunch of guys into rock and roll by making their album very catchy. It's danceable, but not in one of those lame techno ways. The sound on this CD is a lot like California beach rock, so if you're into that, you'll probably think this record is great. The New York scene was always trying to be like California, and the California scene was always trying to be like New York - ah, the irony.

Road To Ruin (1978) 8 Thumbs Up

This is where the Ramones start to change, but hey, it's all good. Maybe it's because drummer Tommy Ramone left to become a music producer and was replaced with Marky Ramone, who used to play for the Voidoids. I haven't ever heard the Voidoids, I just wanted to sound like I know what I'm talking about. Anyway, the production has improved considerably, without sounding like one of those lame "mainstream" rock records, as the hipster kids would say. It also gave them their only real hit, "I Wanna Be Sedated," which is an awesome song.

We've got slow, emotional ballads and acoustic guitars! But it's not the lame "boo hoo I'm hurt" kind - they're actually good. This is what emotional ballads should be. I've said it before and I'll say it again: more bands need to listen to the Ramones. And of course, songs like "I Wanted Everything" and "Go Mental" are good ol' fashioned rock. My personal favourite is "I'm Against It," which is a parody of angsty political punk. Hey, there's nothing I hate more than angsty political punk. This is the last Ramones album the hipsters and punks will admit to liking, because after this, the Ramones became much poppier. What can I say, it was almost the 80's. As I listen to this album, while it is very good, I can't help but feel that something is missing. Maybe it's because they were trying to get a hit on the radio. It's not bad, though - this is where newcomers to the Ramones should start, as I feel it's the best produced and easiest to get into album.

End of the Century (1980) 8 Thumbs Up

This album was produced by schizophrenic producer Phil Spector, washed up from his heyday in the 60's. Yeah, that guy on trial for murdering Lana Clarkson. Considering he pulled a gun on bassist Dee Dee Ramone during the recording of this CD, I'm willing to bet he did it. Put me on the jury!

Anyway, Spector produces this using his legendary "wall of sound" technique. This sounds great for the songs he produced to sound like the rock they are - "Do You Remember Rock N Roll Radio?," "The Return of Jackie and Judy," "Chinese Rock," and the awesome "Rock N Roll High School." The only complaint I have about Spector's production is that he often overdoes it. For example, that saxophone on "Do You Remember Rock N Roll Radio?" is really unneccesary and drives me up the wall. The song would be much better without it. Often, he makes the songs sound overproduced that they sound "distant" rather than live. This is very distracting and makes me want to pull a gun on him.

But hey, the saxophone of the devil notwithstanding, some other great songs are "This Ain't Havana," which is a bit of good ol' 60's pop, "Baby, I Love You," (for all my complaints about Spector overdoing it, the string section in there actually fits), and "Let's Go" and "High Risk Insurance," which were songs about how great the US army is just to annoy hardcore punks. And "Danny Says" could mop the floor with any emo song. This is a very underrated album, and just goes to show you that corporate rock magazine reviewers have no clue what they're talking about. Who are you going to trust, some guy making way more than he's worth, or your good buddy Tressa? Yeah, that's what I thought.

Pleasant Dreams (1981) 6 Thumbs Up

Okay, I have no idea what they were thinking when they made this album. Did they want to have a hit? Had they worked into an inescapable rut? Either way, this album is far too poppy. I mean, c'mon - I want a rock song! Is that too much to ask?

There are some good moments on this CD, like "We Want The Airwaves," "The KKK Took My Baby Away," and "Don't Go." But a lot of it is largely forgettable. I went into this expecting a rock CD with some California pop influence, but instead, got a bland pop album with only a few highlights. And even those highlights are more or less rehashes of the Ramones' earlier career. For the average rock fan, this is nothing more than mediocrity. If you're a pop fan, you might get a kick out of this album. Actually, this could slaughter any pop album today, or of the 80's, because at least it didn't have synthesizers. But for the Ramones, it was really disappointing. Fans everywhere were surprised, and the punks who stuck around after End of the Century cried "Sellout!" Well, considering they didn't even have a hit off this, I wouldn't call it a sellout album, but it is pretty bad. Pass this one over.

I don't own any of the seven Ramones albums from 1983-1993, so bear with me. One day I'll either download them (yes, yes, I'm a horrible fan) or finally locate a store where they aren't $28. Until then, let's skip ahead a decade and a half.

Adios Amigos! (1994) 7 Thumbs Up

First of all, when I listen to this CD, I want to hear Joey sing, not some wet behind the ears Dee Dee replacement. Of course, I'm refering to new bassist CJ's singing. C'mon, Joey's weird accent and semi-crooning are the heart of this band, not this guy. I have to skip over every song CJ sings, which is the worst part of the entire album.

Anyway, the Ramones have done the best they can without Dee Dee. One good thing about these guys is that, although they had a few missteps, they never fell into a shoddy decline they couldn't get out of. This CD is short and fast, the way we want it - only 2 songs are over 3 minutes long. And the good news is, even if Dee Dee might not play on the album, he's contributed some songs he wrote. "Born To Die In Berlin," the album closer, is a great song and makes you wish he'd stayed in the band. The unfortunate thing is, the majority of the other songs lack originality. It's really just the same old, same old. New York producer Daniel Rey, who I'm being told is legendary, but I've actually never heard of, produced this album and pathetically co-wrote about half of the songs. Actually, I'm not sure how much he actually contributed, but he has his name in the songwriting credits of many songs. I'm going to blame him for that going wrong, okay? Luckily, he's a decent producer, and gives a bit of kick to the old wall of sound quality of the Ramones. For all of its shortcomings, this is actually a decent final album, but if they'd kept CJ from singing, it would've been far better.

Greatest Hits Live (1996) 4 Thumbs Up

This was recorded at one of the Ramones' final shows in their home city, New York. The concert has been drastically cut down to 16 songs. If this is their greatest hits, why is there no "Rock N Roll High School," "Chinese Rock," or "Teenage Lobotomy?" I could go on; those are just the first few that came to mind. And CJ sings! Gah! It's like they created this album just to spite me! I actually only bought it because I thought it was a greatest hits collection. I was just getting into the Ramones and wanted "the one with 'Blitzkrieg Bop' on it," so forgive me. The only good thing is that the mixing is good, but with all due respect to Joey, his vocals just aren't in top form. There are way too many useless lesser songs on here. Like, why do we have "Spiderman," but not "Pinhead?" The breakdown is 3 from the self-titled, 4 from Rocket to Russia, 1 from Road to Ruin, 1 from End of the Century, 1 from Too Tough To Die, 1 from Brain Drain, 1 from Mondo Bizarro, and 4 from Adios Amigos!, plus 2 new covers that really don't make this album worth buying.

The Ramones put out far too many live albums for their own good, when all we really needed was It's Alive - a live album from when the Ramones were at their prime in 1978. I want It's Alive so very badly, but I haven't found it in my crappy suburbian town. When I finally do, it'll be like $30. Rest assured, I will be hawking this lame CD at my local used record store as soon as possible, and that money will go towards It's Alive.

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