CHAPTER TWENTY ONE




Sam sat on her bed doing her music theory homework when Jordan walked in.

"MAIL CALL!!!"

Sam couldn't help but laugh. It was almost Thanksgiving break.....she had been at college for about 3 months or so. In that time, her and Jordan had grown close together, although Sam had yet to tell her about Nick.

"Sooo..........who the hell is Nick?"

Sam jerked her head back as if she'd been slapped, "Huh? Wh......what did you say?"

"I said, who is Nick? The guy that keeps writing you. You've gotten like a thousand letters from him and I have yet to see you open one up and read it. So who is he? Boyfriend?"

"No, he's not my boyfriend......"

"Lover?"

"No...."

"Psychosomatic serial killer?"

"Jordan!!!"

"Come on Sam!! I'm serious.......who is this guy and why are you avoiding him?"

"He's no one.....just an old friend I want to forget......now please drop it."

"Fine.....but here's another letter from him. One from your folks and one from somebody with illegible handwriting," Jordan said handing Sam her pile.

Sam took her mail and looked at it. Sure enough, there was one from Nick, her parents and the third was barely readable and had no return address. Tossing it aside, Sam opened the letter from her parents.

Sweetie-
Hello sweetie. How are things at school? What's been going on? Your father and I are worried about you.......we never heard from you anymore. Are you doing okay? Well, you have Thanksgiving break soon.......I hope you'll be coming home to see us. We miss you. Give me a call when you get this.....please.

Love Always,
Mom

Sam felt her eyes well up as she read this.

"Hey......you okay Sam?"

"Yea Jordan.....I'm fine."

Jordan went back to opening her mail while Sam turned to the unidentified piece on her bed. Carefully opening the envelope, she pulled out a single sheet of paper. Opening it, Sam's jaw dropped open.

Sam,
Are you purposefully trying to kill Nick, or is this just a game to you? Can't you see how much you're hurting him or are you really that blind? It's just so easy for you isn't it? I mean, you're not the one who has to be here dealing with it and with him. He's wasting away as he waits for you to respond to his letters. Answer him and end it once and for all so he can move on. I'm asking you to do this as his best friend......

Brian

Sam could feel the hatred and anger pour off the paper. She had never thought that Brian could be so angry.......and at her. Crumbling the paper up, she tossed it in her waste basket and took a deep breath. She just sat there staring into space until Jordan had to practically yell her name to get an answer.

"SAM!!"

"Huh? Oh, sorry Jordan, what did you say?"

"I asked what you were doing for our break."

"Oh....I don't know.....my parents want me to come home but I don't want to......"

"Well......wanna come with me?"

"Where?"

"My folks are sending me to Hawaii for Thanksgiving."

"I'd love to Jordan, but I can't afford that kind of trip."

"It's on me. They said I could bring a friend at their expense. They feel bad cuz they've got to be out of town on business. So what do you say?"

A slow smile crept across Sam's lips, "Sure, that'd be great."

"YES!! We're gonna party!!!"

Sam laughed as she watched Jordan dance around. Now all she had to do was tell her parents.......something she wasn't looking forward to.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

They guys sat around the studio taking a break. It had been a very hectic couple of months. They had signed to the JIVE label and after that everything got chaotic. They had to make a decision about managers and after a long debate, they had settled on Ms. Miles and Mrs. Comings. Then they were sent to meet with producers and writers. And finally, they were now in the studio recording. They had a long list of songs to record and then they would decide what would be on the album.

Kevin looked over at Nick and Brian. The two were wrestling on the floor. Kevin gave a sigh of relief. Nick was finally coming out of his shell a little bit. They were all still taking it one day at a time. Sam had really messed Nick up and it's been taking him a long time to get back to where he used to be. All of the guys had been there for him as much as they could, they all just hoped it worked out. Kevin couldn't help but feel sorry for him. Having your heart broken was not a fun thing to go through.....especially at such a young age.

"Hey you guys!! You gonna come join us civilized people for lunch or what?"

"Aw man Kevin, do we gotta??" Brian whined in a little boy voice.

Kevin just rolled his eyes at them as they all sat down and dug in.

"So how many more songs are we gonna record today?" Howie asked Ms. Miles.

"Well, how many do you guys want to do? I'd say we have to get at least 2 more done....."

They all just nodded their heads and continued eating. This was their schedule lately. They got up, went to the studio, sang, ate, sang, sang, sang, and then went home. While it may seem boring to some, they all enjoyed it very much.

"Oh guys.....forgot to tell you, after this is wrapped up at the end of the week, we're gonna meet with producers to decide what makes it and what doesn't. Then we're going to pick the first single, release it and cross our fingers."

"WHAT?!!" They all yelled simultaneously.

Ms. Miles looked at them like they were all crazy.

"Sorry......what do you mean, the first single? We're really gonna release a single.......like soon?" Howie clarified.

"Yes, as in it should be released say in about a month or two."

The guys just sat back in awe. They still couldn't believe all this was happening. It all seemed so surreal. They all quickly finished eating and got right back to work with new found energy.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"Um......mom?"

"Sam? Is that you?"

"Yea......I got your letter today......."

"Are you okay? You never call or anything....."

"I know mom......I'm sorry.....I've just been getting swept up into the whole college thing......you know, harder work, more people, trying to fit in and all......"

"I know......I just wish you'd come home for a weekend now and then....."

"Mom.......you know I can't.......not right now."

"Well, are you at least coming home for Thanksgiving?"

"Well......that's actually why I called......my roommate doesn't have anyone to have Thanksgiving with...."

"Well, bring her with you!"

"No mom.....that's not it. Her parents are sending her to Hawaii and she asked me to go......."

"Honey, you know we can't afford that right now."

"I know mom........I wouldn't have to pay for anything....it's her treat......well her parents treat.....they feel bad cuz they can't be home......and I don't want her to be alone over the holiday......."

"So you aren't coming home is what you're saying."

"Yea," Sam whispered guiltily into the phone.

Sam could hear her mother sigh over the phone.

"Fine........Sam I hope you figure this all out soon......"

"So do I mom......so do I........."

Sam hung up the phone quickly and retreated back to her bed. She opened Nick's letter and began to cry. Unbeknownst to Jordan, she did read his letters......usually in private and then she hid them. It was kind of like self inflicted torture upon herself. While she wanted to move on and forget him, she still wanted to know what was going on in his life. Her eyes blurred over once again as she read.

Dear Sam,
Well, here I am, once again writing you..........waiting for a reply which never comes. The guys are finally starting to back off.......guess I've put my "happy" face on well enough around them. Right now we're working on getting our first single released. I just wish I could share this moment with my best friend.......but she doesn't want to have anything to do with me. I would sure love to know why.....but it seems she just doesn't care anymore. I'm not sure how long this is going to go on Sam......me writing and waiting.......but I can guarantee that it will end one day......and when it does......our friendship is dead and can never be revived. Don't let that happen......

Love,
Nick

Sam folded the letter back up and placed it back in the envelope. Going over to her closet, she place it in the shoe box that was filled with all of his other letters. Sam wished she could just write him back. God knows, she had tried. Countless times, she had sat down at her desk and started a letter to him. But she had never been able to explain what had happened. And she knew if she contacted him, she'd owe him an explanation......and that was just something she couldn't give him. As Sam sat there and thought over the past couple of months, Jordan walked in.

"Hey Sam.......whatcha doing?"

"Oh nothing......I told my parents I was going to Hawaii with you."

"Yea? What'd they say?"

"They aren't too happy but they'll get over it."

"Are you sure Sam? I don't want you to start fighting with your folks over this."

"Na, they'll be fine......they're just worried that I've been under too much stress."

Before Jordan could reply, their phone rang. Jordan walked over to pick it up.

"Hello? Yes.....hold on a sec.....may I tell her who's calling? Okay, just a minute please." Jordan covered the mouthpiece with her hand and looked over at Sam, "Sam? It's for you.....some guy named Gean......"

Sam looked at her for a minute before going and taking the phone from Jordan.

"Hello, this is Sam....."

"Hi."

Sam's face went pale and she dropped the phone. With shaking hands, she picked it back up and placed it to her ear once again.

"Didn't expect to hear from me, huh?"

"How'd you get my number?"

"You mom gave it to BJ.....and BJ left it on her dresser.......so are you ever going to talk to me?"

"I.........I can't Nick.....I'm sorry, I just can't."

With that Sam hung up the phone and turned back to Jordan who was staring at her with interest in her eyes.

"So that was Nick?"

"Yea...."

"Well?"

"Well what?"

"What did he want?"

"To talk....."

"I give up Sam.......you know I'm always willing to listen if you ever need to talk......"

"I know.....thanks Jordan.....I just can't discuss this right now. From now on......if it's Nick or Gean.....I'm not here, okay?"

Jordan just nodded her head and after throwing Sam one more worried look, she headed to her desk to finish her work. Sam laid down on her bed and cried herself to sleep again.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Nick slowly hung up the phone. The call went a lot better than he had expected to be honest. He'd had her number for a couple weeks but never knew what to say. He had expected her to just hang up on him once she realized who it was. Nick didn't have long to dwell on the phone call. A moment later, the rest of the guys came out and they all headed back in to finish up recording. Though he tried not to show it on the outside, Nick's thoughts were filled with Sam. That and lyrics to a song he had been working on since she had left. He had yet to approach the guys about it, but he wanted it on the album......or at least on a single. Trying to clear his head, Nick attempted to concentrate on the task at hand......recording.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

"So how'd it go?"

"How'd what go Brian?"

"Your phone call."

"What phone call?"

"Don't play dumb Frack. I know you called Sam......so how'd it go?"

"Better than I thought.....she didn't hang up right away.....but she wouldn't talk either."

"I'm sorry man......I hate to tell you this, but maybe you need to just move on and forget her. She's not the same girl you knew......"

"I know Bri......but it's hard........she's always been in my life.......and I miss that...."

"I know buddy, I know. Why don't we go out and do something......"

"No......I'm tired from recording......I just wanna go to bed......"

Brian looked at Nick worriedly but nodded nonetheless. He dropped Nick off and headed home himself.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

Nick slowly dragged himself up to bed. Looking around, he contemplated writing Sam another letter but decided against it. As much as he loved her, he was losing the battle with her. That scared him more than he cared to admit. Undressing, Nick climbed into bed and turned out the light. Staring up at the darkened ceiling, his brain took him back to the years when him and Sam were inseparable. Thinking of the time he had beaten up some guy for hurting her feelings, Nick fell asleep with a slight smile on his face.





Chapter Twenty-Two