Written by: Jacqueline Janine Cristina
Copyright: 1998
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The cursor blinked rapidly on Jackie’s monitor. So many ideas were floating around in her head she could barely think straight. What was she gonna tell Nick? What if she wrote down something stupid? He would think she was an idiot. Maybe he would never ll her again? Nah, that was impossible. Nick said he loved her. At least that’s what she thought. Maybe he just said that cause he wanted her to think that.
“Why can’t he just call me?!? That would be a lot easier and would save me a lot more time.” she thought out loud to herself. Thank God no one was home, they’d think she was crazy. She took a quick glance at her cat, Smokey, and thought once more,
She shut her eyes closed and thought as the painful memories swept over her. She remembered the night, the night that had changed her for the rest of her life. She opened her now tear-filled eyes and began to touch the keys, one by one.
She stopped and thought: Who are you kidding? You can’t tell him what happened that night! He’ll treat you the way “she” did. He’ll think your a liar,and a slut, he’ll treat you like an alien. Forget it,.... don’t tell him. Don’t tell anyone.
She wiped a tear from her eye and continued at the keys.
I got your letter yesterday. Your handwriting is almost identical to chicken scratch! Next time type it, please. It’s easier for me that way. I type my letters all the time, you never complain. Oh, yeah, tell the guys I said “hi”. Give a big hug and ki to each and every one. Brian, AJ, Kevin, Aaron, Howie, Tim, and Denise. You know all the people I talk to. Nothing has been happening here, just the occasional fight with Michael and my parents. I’m trying to be good, it’s just that they’re so hard to al with! Dancing is coming along well. My dance teacher wants to sign me up from some program where I teach small children the basics of ballet. She’s says I have a real good ability. I’m all for it. I just gotta find time. I’m thinking about dropping cheerleading. I was appointed captain and ever since the girls haven’t been cutting me any slack. Lisa dropped it for b-ball. I’m all alone now. Susanna has been doing the whole b-ball thing. Mrs. Winters thinks I have some sort of depression cause I alway seem so down. How’d she know? She real nice cause she’s the only teacher that has ever really showed affection towards me. I mean they might mean it, but they don’t show it. Well, there’s really know point in all of this (cause I know your gonna call in ike 2 seconds) so I’m gonna leave you for now. LUV-YA! ~ Jackie ~
“ I just e-mailed you.” she said into the receiver. “Well, hi to you ,too.” Nick teased. “ I’ve missed you. Well, anyway, what’s new and exciting in your life?” she asked as she opened the refrigerator door to pull out the carton of lemon-aid. “ Not much here. Well, at least nothing that’ll interest you. I’ve missed you too.” he said with a sigh. “You know that I’m always interested about things that have to do with you. “ she said pouring the lemon-aid into her Winnie the Pooh cup. “You sound tired. What’s wrong? I know you hate when I ask this question, but, um, when are you coming here?” she implied, hoping for an answer she would like.
“Actually, I’m glad you ask me that cause there’s been a problem with the scheduling and it seems to me that I’ll be able to see you tomorrow afternoon.” he replied with excitement in his voice. She heard some noise in the background as Nick began to say something. It sounded like Brian complaining. “Jackie, can you hold on for 1 second. Brian has something important to tell me.”Nick asked. “Sure.”she replied. “Hello.”Nick said. “Yeah, I’m still alive.”Jackie said in a rather sarcastic tone. “I gotta go cause we have to do some last minute arrangements for tomorrow’s big trip to New York. I’m sorry. I really wanted to talk to you. You understand,...don’t you?”Nick asked in a frustrated voice. “Of course. No biggie. I’ll just see you tomorrow. Oh, yeah, call me as soon as you get here, no matter what time it is.”Jackie responded in a calmer tone than Nick’s. “Bye.” “Bye.”
After that, she hung up the cordless and started for her room. She walked in and closed the door behind her.She fingered her way through her CD’s until she found one that she thought was appropriate for her mood. She laid down on her bed as N’Sync’s “Sailing” let her drift off to daydream. The images of her ex yelling and threatening to hit her floated by. She saw visions of her horrible past and what might end up to be her painful future. What would Nick do if he found out? She wasn’t sure what to do. Being confused seemed to be an everyday feeling for her. She hated it. Why was this so hard?
Well, he’s coming tomorrow. That’s when I have to do it. Well, I don’t have to. I want to,....maybe. Whatever! Just think about something that’ll calm you down and forget about your problems. DOLPHINS!!! That’s it! Think about dolphins. And Nick of course.
She slowly drifted off to sleep and thought about the two things that made her the happiest. Nick and dolphins.
*********** FIVE HOURS LATER**************
A noise awoke her up in the middle of the night. Her eyes darted around the room, looking for anything unusual. Nothing. A dark figure jumped out at her. Smokey. Jackie breathed a sigh of relief knowing now that it was just her cat and nothing more. She glanced at the clock on her night stand. It read 3:55. She felt hot and looked down at herself to find that she was still wearing her jeans and shirt from earlier that day. She got up and quickly changed into her Winnie the Pooh flannel boxers and white tank top. She fell back into her deep sleep. She couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come. Finally, she could see the face behind all the phone conversations and e-mails. She could see Nick.
The alarm clock on Jackie’s nightstand sent the sound of Eagle Eye Cherry’s “Save Tonight” blaring around the room. She ran her hand around the nightstand until she found the alarm clock. She smacked down the snooze button and slowly threw her forest green comforter off her body. Jackie quickly realized what today was. It was the day she was going to get to see Nick for the first time in 5 months. The phone rang as she was putting on her robe. She walked down the cold marble floor to the kitchen where the phone was.
“Lo” she said barely being able to say the whole word. “Jackie, wake up it’s Nick. Hurry up and get dressed or whatever you need to do cause we’re gonna be there in like 10 minutes.” he said in a hyper voice. “Okay, whatever,...... who’s we?” she asked in a tired voice. “ Me and the rest of the guys. Who else would come?!? Anyway, I can’t wait to see you so hurry up, okay?” Nick asked. “Sure, later.” she said. With that she hung up the phone and made her way to the shower.
The doorbell rang. She just finished putting on her mascara and lip gloss, and headed for the door. She opened it to find none other than her boyfriend and his friends, a.k.a. THE BACKSTREET BOYS.
