"What's wrong?" Nick asked me, with genuine concern. It was a month later, and I had realized what could be a devastating factor to our relationship.
I sat across from him on a white wicker chair on the patio next to the pool. I wasn't sure how to begin to tell him. I mean, I've been thinking all day of what to say to him, and I knew he noticed that I had something on my mind. I knew he knew what I was about to say, he just simply forgot.
"Nick," I began, taking a deep breath, "You know that in a week I have to move back, right?"
Nick sat there, in the never ending silence. "Yeah," he whispered, looking past me to the softly lapping pool.
"What's going to happen to us?" I asked, fidgeting.
Nick looked over at me and started to say something, but when I locked my eyes with his he seemed uncomfortable and turned away. "I don't know," he said, shortly.
I could tell by his body language that the subject was making him tense and upset. "Nick, I am sorry. I mean I know..."
"Don't. I shouldn't have gotten involved," he muttered. He muttered the last part, and I don't think he knew that I heard, I don't think intended for me to hear that.
I took a deep breath, trying to keep my tears from spilling onto my cheeks. I has been so strong until he had said that. "Do you mean that?" I asked, hoping he would say no.
"I don't know what I mean anymore," Nick replied, looking me right in the eyes. That hurt me so much.
I stood up with my tears freely strolling down my cheeks, "I love you, Nick." I whispered.
Nick didn't answer. "Do you love me?" I asked, as more of a plea.
"I don't know what I love or what I mean anymore. I just need some time to think," he snapped.
I sighed and walked out of his house, and possibly out of his life forever.
"Come in," I called, someone was at my bedroom door, and I was guessing it was Micki.
Micki strolled in and stopped in her tracks, "What do you think you're doing?"
I looked over at her, "What do you mean?"
"You're packing. You don't leave for a while!" Micki replied.
"Oh, this," I said, waving my hand over the piles of clothes on my bed that I was packing into my suitcases.
Micki rolled her eyes, "Yes, this."
"I have to get away from here," I said.
"Why?" Micki asked, "You've got it all. You've got Nick."
"No, I don't," I mumbled.
"What happened?" Micki asked, sympathetically.
"He freaked when I brought up me going back to school. I asked if he loved me and he said he didn't know what he loved anymore," I sobbed, sitting down on the edge of the bed, my face in the palms of my hands.
"I am so sorry!" Micki apologized.
"I'm going to exchange my ticket, get one for a sooner flight," I said, through my sobs.
"When are you going to come back to visit us? We miss you here," Micki said.
"No. I'm not coming back here. I'm going to stay in Connecticut," I answered.
"No visits?" Micki asked.
I shook my head, "I can't handle it. Too many memories."
Micki came over and hugged me, "I'm going to miss you."
"You can always come visit me," I reminded her.
The two of us looked at each other and burst into tears.
Chapter Six
Chapter Eight
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