November 26, 2007 9:15 AM
“Hi, Buffy, how are you doing today?” Dr. Parker said as she bustled
into the exam room. She looked around. “Where is Spike? I thought he was
going to come to all the appointments.”
“He’s in the waiting room. I wanted to talk to you about something.”
Buffy’s fingers played with the paper curtain around her waist, slowly tearing it, using it as a focal point so she wouldn’t have to look at her doctor.
“Is this something that Spike doesn’t know about?”
“No, no, he knows, it’s just that…”
“You want to hear my opinion and decide how much you want to tell him,” Dr. Parker finished.
It sounded a lot worse when the doctor put it like that, and Buffy flushed under the knowledge that was exactly what she wanted to do. It wasn’t totally selfish because her motive was to protect Spike from anymore hurt but then it was his wife and baby and he did have the right to know everything.
“Yeah, it was but I guess it’s not really fair.”
Dr. Parker laughed, “Do you want me to go and get him?”
“Yeah,” Buffy answered and smiled.
It took only a few moments for the doctor to go to the waiting room and bring a relieved Spike into the exam room.
“It’s like pregnant heaven out there,” he said, “and I felt like the odd man out, with my stomach not swollen and everything.” He took up residence in his chair, relaxing as he looked between the two women.
They both laughed at his comment as Dr. Parker settled onto her stool and opened Buffy’s file.
“So, what is up, young lady?”
“I’ve been having an unusual craving.” Buffy hesitated for a moment, unsure of the response that she would get. “It’s blood.”
To her credit and Buffy’s relief, her doctor didn’t show much of a reaction to Buffy’s statement, only the slight raising of her brows.
“And have you been drinking it?”
“Yeah, I’ve been drinking from Spike.”
“Ahhh, is that why you didn’t want him in here, because you wanted to ask if you were turning into a vampire?” The doctor polite and gentle smile allowed Buffy to relax for the first time since getting there.
“You were worried about that?” Spike asked. His brows knitted together as he looked at her in astonishment.
Buffy nodded her head, unable to speak past the lump in her throat as she fought back the tears that were stinging her eyes. Spike stood and wrapped his arms around her, rubbing his hands up and down her back. She leaned into her husband, thankful for the comfort that he was giving her.
“It doesn’t happen like that. There is no way you are becoming a vampire.”
“Spike’s right. The baby conceived from a vampire maybe causing the cravings due to its own genetic makeup or you may have been craving it simply from a lack of iron.”
“Really?” Buffy smiled. “It’s not like I don’t know how vampires are made but you and Angel were both talking about me taking on the characteristics of a vampire and I guess my imagination went into overdrive.”
“Angel?” Dr. Parker asked.
“He’s my Sire,” Spike replied and sat back down but never letting go of Buffy’s hand.
“Buffy, you are married to a vampire. You’re a Slayer. You know the habits and characteristics of being a vampire. Plus you did the ritual and you basically lived Spike’s life in fast motion. If you’re feeling fragile, it’s logical that you would fall back on what you know and what you may feel would bond you to Spike even more. Have you talked to Sara about all this?”
“No, not yet, my next appointment is Wednesday.”
“Talk to her. She’ll be able to help you with this more than I could but back to the craving for blood. Like I said, it could be the baby causing it or your iron count was low. So, we are going to treat what we can. I’m going to give you some new prenatal vitamins that I prescribe to women who are chronically anemic to give you extra iron.” Dr. Parker said as she reached for some papers that was hanging in files on the counter. She handed one to Buffy. “This is a list of high iron foods that I want you to start eating. Now, “she turned her to attention to Spike. “You can’t keep letting her drink your blood or you’re going to do some harm to yourself. I want you to start taking iron supplements yourself because I know you’re not going to listen to me. Be careful though and try to supplement it with human blood.”
“We have pig’s blood in the house.” Buffy said.
“No, no, for either of you,” Dr. Parker shook her head at them. “I’m surprised that Kate hasn’t said something. Spike, now that you have a human body you can pick up all sorts of diseases from pig’s blood, so, human blood from now on. I’ll call Kate later and arrange for you all to get some on a regular basis.”
“Thank, Dr. Parker, I…we appreciate it.”
“No problem, okay, unless there is something else, let’s proceed with the exam.”
Buffy lay back on the table, reaching for Spike’s hand, as Dr. Parker began to measure her stomach for the baby’s growth. She felt a lot better since talking to the doctor. Even though they were pretty sure that it was the baby that was causing the craving, it felt good to know that it might actually have a simple explanation also. It made it easier to keep loving her baby.
November 26, 2007 1:17 PM
Mentally checking off the list in her head, Buffy grabbed the needed socks from
his drawer and returned to the bed where there was an open duffel bag and garment
bag. She packed the socks into the duffel bag and headed for the closet to get
his suits and shirts. As she situated them in the garment bag, Spike returned
to the room with a small bag with his toiletries in them. Holding her hand out,
he gave it to her so she could nestle it in the smaller bag.
“You know you don’t have to do this for me,” Spike said. A warm smile plastered on his face as he plopped onto the bed and leaned against the headboard.
Buffy playfully pinched his leg and smiled. “But I like doing little domestic wifey things for you. It makes me feel like Samantha or something sending you off on a business trip with Larry.”
“You make it sound like you just want to get rid of me.”
Spike tried to pull her down onto his lap but she pulled away.
“Let me get this finished.” Buffy ticked off on her fingers as she went through her mental list of everything he would need for his trip to New York to meet with his publisher and for his first book signing. “The navy blue suit is for the business meeting, the black suit is for the television appearance and the faded jeans and black turtleneck is for the signing. And I threw in a couple of extra jeans and shirts.”
“You take such good care of me.” Spike mocked as she zipped up the two bags. As soon as she was done, he held his arms out. “Now, will you give me some?”
“Oh, does my husband, the television star, still want his plain little wife that he left behind in California,” Buffy teased as she settled onto his lap. She wiggled a little, enjoying the instant reaction against her hip, her arms looped around his neck. “I guess you do.”
“No one else but you will do, Baby. No one. And besides I’m not a star yet. I’m the last guest and I am only going to be on there for two minutes. Show the book, say my name and that’s it, time to roll the credits.”
“So, I’m safe until you’re the main guest, huh?”
“Something like that,” Spike teased her as he moved her onto her back and he covered her with his body.
Buffy’s fingers drifted through her husband’s locks and bent her leg allowing him greater access to the treasure between her thighs. His lips teased at her neck as his fingers kneaded her bottom, sending a haze of need coursing through Buffy’s body. It still wasn’t real that he was leaving her for three days and she was afraid of being without him. But she refused to say anything to him that would make him cancel and she knew he would if she asked.
“I love you, Baby. Take care of yourself over there. She might be there and planning something.”
The stalker had sent a dozen roses to the house that morning. The note attached offered congratulations and support for Spike’s trip and it had made her nervous. SB was becoming increasingly bolder and more familiar with each note. Spike was going to be out in the open and there was always the chance that she would plan some kind of meeting with him. Barney had offered a bodyguard but it had been turned down. Spike felt that a bodyguard would actually be more a hindrance if something would happen and he would be unable to use his vampire abilities to protect himself.
Spike rose up on his elbows to look down at her. “It’s going to be okay. I promise.”
“I know you can take care of yourself. Don’t get me wrong. I just don’t like you being away from me.”
“Do you want me to stay?”
His hands were gentle as they brushed her hair back from her face. Buffy knew he would offer and she hated that she had shown weakness to him. Not today.
“No, I want you to go. Do what you need to do. Enjoy it and we’ll be fine.” She smiled up at her husband, using her happy grin to appease his worry. “I’ll be fine.”
Spike growled softly before kissing her finally. It was soft and coaxing as if he was memorizing the curve of them and the sweet pull that he always felt when he kissed her. A small electric charge that he could feel flashing down his body and ending in his groin, every time even after all these years. Each time was momentous in that she was his and would allow him to taste such glory. His tongue dipped and retreated into the warmth recesses of her mouth as she tried to capture it with her teeth. It was a familiar game that usually ended with them giggling and wrestling and today was no different as they played knowing that it couldn’t end in the love making that they really wanted. Giles as well the limousine to pick Spike up were on the way and time didn’t permit them the release they both needed. And just as Buffy was rolling Spike onto his back a knock sounded on the door.
“Let’s go,” Spike sighed as they stood. He grabbed his bag as Buffy took his hand and led him downstairs. At the bottom of the stairs, he put his bags down as she opened the door.
Giles stood at the door, with his hands in his pockets. Next to him was an unfamiliar man in a black suit.
“Hello, I’m here to pick up Mr. Blood,” the stranger said as Giles stepped into the house.
“That’s me,” Spike said. “Give me just one minute.”
The driver nodded and took the bags out to the car. As soon as he was down the steps Spike shut the door.
“Call me if anyone needs me,” he said. “Giles, take care of them for me.”
“I will,” the Watcher said. “Have fun in New York and just remember that everyone will be watching you.”
“Thanks, I so appreciate that Rupert.”
Buffy wrapped her arms around her husband, wanting and needing one last embrace before she sent him away. She sent a grateful look to Giles as he turned to head into the living room giving the couple a moment alone to say good-bye.
“I love you, Pet,” Spike whispered. He loosened her arms from around him and knelt on the floor at Buffy’s feet.
Buffy eyes filled with tears as he pulled her shirt up and tugged her pants down so he could converse with their baby. Moments like these made her realize how much her vampire had changed over the years. He was still as tough as ever but he was no longer afraid to let his tender side show. She loved it that he had opened himself so much for her and their family. The family he had said he never wanted but now lived for.
“You behave yourself,” he whispered to her tummy. “I love you and so does Mummy but I’m going to be gone for a few days and I need you not to give her a hard time when I’m not around. Take care of her for me.”
Spike placed a soft kiss on her belly, before rising to pull Buffy to him in a searing kiss that she felt all the way to her toes. She swore that she wouldn’t cry. She wouldn’t do that to him. She would leave him with a smile. And when they broke the kiss, she wished him luck and told him how much she loved him and sent him on his way. She stayed at the door until the car was gone so that his last view of home would be her smiling and waving to him.
After the car was out of view, Buffy sighed and headed to the living room. Giles had made himself comfortable on the couch and she sat beside him.
“Where’s Benjamin?”
It was the way that her former Watcher hesitated and cleaned his glasses that made her wary.
“I left him with Tara at the shop for the afternoon.” Giles explained without looking at her.
Giles didn’t want to be alone with his baby while watching the crazy woman. The pain was sharp as his words cut through her heart. Buffy had assumed that if anyone would be able to handle what was happening to her it was Giles but apparently she had been wrong. She stood quickly and looked down at him.
“Make yourself at home, Giles. I’m going to go the basement and practice yoga. If you feel the need to watch me, go for it, otherwise I’ll be down there for about an hour or so.”
“Buffy, don’t be angry. It’s not like that. We just felt that it would be better if the baby wasn’t here and I could be fully available for you if you needed it.”
Even with the logical explanation it still hurt because she was being denied her friends now that they had been turned into her guards. Buffy had been looking forward to an afternoon of playing with Benjamin and visiting with Giles and now it had become a watch and wait game to see if she would have an episode. Knowing that it wasn’t his fault, Buffy kissed the older man on the cheek.
“I know Giles. Thank you for coming over. I’m still going to go downstairs. Like I said make yourself at home and hopefully nothing will happen on your shift.”
Smiling gently, Buffy left Giles sitting there as she made her way down stairs. It was getting lonelier by the minute and it was only going to get worse.
November 26, 2007 1:42 PM
Buffy spread the mats across the floor, trying to shake off the bad feelings leftover from her encounter with Giles, and when the mats were down, she took a deep breath to try and focus. The yoga instructor at Tara’s school had put together a series of poses that were to help her both maintain her physical shape and to help her become more grounded in the world around her. She moved through the poses precisely and deliberately, letting each one give her the result that it was meant to give. After the routine was done and she had completed her cool down, she settled on the mat in the lotus position. The lights had been dimmed and a candle sent a soothing scent drifting in the air as she let her mind slip into a meditative state.
Tara had suggested that she try meditating again to gain focus and hopefully keep her from having or reducing her episodes. Today she let her breathing fall into a deep and steady rhythm as her mind floated freely. Trying not to force herself into any one place would help reveal what was going on inside of her.
A smile curved Buffy’s lips as she found herself in the middle of a field with a clear night sky above her. It was like black velvet with stars so bright and close, making her feel that she could just reach up and take a hold of one. The smell of a fire burning made her scan the horizon and on the edge of the field was a small farm house. A fantasy weaved with her vision of her and Spike living here, so far away from everything and everyone, free to be only themselves and to enjoy and love each other unreservedly. Anticipation hummed along her nerve endings as she ran joyfully toward the house, laughter echoed around her, and she knew it was her that sounded so childish and free. She didn’t even hesitate at the door, this was for her, and she stepped into the house.
Immediately a stifling heat and an overwhelming stench assaulted her as she stepped into the living room. Gagging she wanted to leave this place but she knew what caused the smell and she couldn’t stop her feet from taking her to the source. Room to room she wandered until she came into the kitchen. The table still held the dinner that wasn’t finished and her eyes slowly became focused to the near darkness but she knew this was where the odor originated. It was in this room and her hand fumbled for the light switch. Light flooded the room and nausea overwhelmed her as the two bodies on the floor became startlingly clear in the harsh illumination. The man and woman stared unseeingly at the ceiling, their throats torn open.
Wrenching free from the vision, Buffy ran for the sink and vomited her lunch into the basin. Her body refused to quit rebelling until everything was gone. She looked toward the stairs, hoping that Giles hadn’t heard her; reached for a paper towel to wipe her face and hands. After cleaning up she slid along the washer until she was sitting on the floor. She wondered if Dawn was right about the ritual. That somehow her mind had been fractured and now it was slowly breaking open and her conscience was becoming lost in Spike’s memories.
