November 28, 2007 10:55 PM

Pulling the blanket tighter around her, Buffy settled into Spike’s chair in his study. Her sigh was as soft as the night and as deep as her love for her absent husband. She ran a hand over the small bulge of her stomach while dialing the phone with the other. Earlier Spike had called to talk to the children, and they had excitedly told him they were staying up to watch him on television and then without thinking had told him about the addition of Delores to the household. By the time the phone had been handed to her, she could feel his anger bristling through the phone wires. He had curtly told her that he loved her and for her to call him after he had gotten back to the hotel. In a way she hoped that he wasn’t back at the hotel yet and she could leave a cowardly message that she had been obedient and tried to call but that she was really tired and would talk to him later. Unfortunately, fate wasn’t going for that because he answered on the first ring, barking out a hello that made her wince.

“Hey Baby, how did the show go?” Buffy asked, hoping to head off any chance of an argument.

Spike chuckled softly and sighed. “I felt like a bleedin’ fool up there and probably looked it too.”

“I’m sure you did fine and the kids are all excited about watching their Daddy on the TV.”

“I miss you and I miss them.”

His voice held all the loneliness he was feeling being so far away and Buffy wished she was there to hold onto him.

“I’m feeling the same way.”

“So, what happened?”

Spike switched gears so fast that Buffy had to think to remember the calm speech she had prepared so that he wouldn’t be too upset on the change of plans.

“Its fine, Spike, everyone was uncomfortable being here and I was uncomfortable having them here. Delores offered and I hired her.” There was a deep sigh on the other end and she knew that he was running his hand through his hair before lying back on the bed to gaze at the ceiling. “Everything is as fine as can be and nothing for you to worry about. Having her here is actually great; she’s fixing the meals and cleaning up. The kids listen to her and everybody is actually relaxed.”

“I’m three thousand miles away so I’m going to trust that you made the right choice, Buffy.”

Buffy chuckled at his imparting wisdom. “Nice to hear that after all these years you feel that way.”

“Bitch.”

“Yep, that’s me. So, Baby, do me a favor?”

“What?”

“Quit worrying about all the things you can’t do anything about and just think about me for a minute.”

“Yeah, and what am I thinking?”

“That I’m lying in our bed and thinking about you.”

Buffy could hear him shifting on the bed and the soft thunk of his shoes hitting the floor. She waited until he inhaled that way he did when he first wrapped his hand around his cock like it was a treasure that he had just discovered. She smiled and closed her eyes to picture him waiting for her, and concentrated on trying to make him forget about everything that was worrying him. Her words led him through the first shivers of sexual anticipation, all the way to a climax that left her needful of some attention herself.

“I love you,” he managed to get out between gasping breaths. “You do amazing things to me.” He added a few moments later. “Be right back.”

Buffy smiled as she waited for him to come back to the bed, listening to the soft sounds carried over the phone. The water running, ice clinking into a glass, the muttered curse word as Spike bumped into something and finally him settling back onto the bed and picking up the phone.

“Hey,” he whispered. “You’re turn.”

“No, I’ll wait for you to return. The tease would be only that and besides,” Buffy chuckled, “I don’t have the energy; rather lie there and let you do all the work.”

“You okay?”

He sounded worried and she quickly reassured him.

“Yeah, just tired a lot, guess my body is going through changes with the baby. The books all say it’s normal to be tired at this stage.”

“I’ll be glad when I’m home. Take care of you myself.”

She stroked the phone and blinked back some tears as the loneliness made itself known. It was crazy when you thought about it, he was only gone two days and she felt like her heart was breaking without him.

“Come home as soon as you can, I need you to take care of me.”

They talked for a few minutes more about the children and the house and whispered of their love before finally saying goodnight. And after Buffy clicked the phone off, she wept because she needed him more then she ever thought she could. And she berated herself for all the time she had wasted running from them. Now every second was precious to her because she was afraid that one day she wouldn’t even remember who he was.

~~~~~~~~~~

November 29, 2007 4:37 AM

The phone ringing was strident in the early morning hours, waking the two sleeping in the master bedroom. Without opening her eyes, Raven fumbled around on the nightstand until she found the instrument that was waking them. Buffy opened her eyes and sat up, instantly on her mind was her husband so far away from them.

“Hello,” Raven mumbled out, a few moments of silence as she moved to lean on her elbows, “hello is anyone there?”

Clicking the phone off she threw it on the bed between them and gave it a dirty look before pulling the covers over her head.

“Who was it?” Buffy asked.

“They didn’t say anything.”

“What’s the caller ID say?”

Growling Raven came back out of her cocoon, turning on the light as she wiped the sleepies from her eyes then peered at the small box in annoyance.

“Unknown caller.”

Buffy worried her bottom lip as she picked the phone up. Earlier when Spike had called the ID had said the name of the hotel so she tried to talk herself out of calling him just to check. But she remembered that it was three hours later where he was, glanced at the clock and realized that he should be awake because the book signing started at 10 AM. As she flipped the phone over to dial, it rang again.

“Hello,” Buffy answered, as her hand sought out her daughters.

“Are you her?”

“Uh, her who?”

Trying to place the voice and still trying to wake up, Buffy just played along.

“The bitch who stole my William.”

It clicked and anger flooded through Buffy’s system.

“I’m William’s wife and how the hell did you get our phone number?”

“The same way I know everything about him. From him because I’m the one, he’s supposed to be with. He belongs to me and our love that is eternal.”

“Who the hell are you? And where did you get your delusions from, K-mart?”

“Don’t fuck with me, whore. I know William is easily seduced by pretty faces but if you don’t leave him alone, I’ll make sure yours isn’t so pretty anymore.”

Buffy laughed at the woman who was trying so hard to threaten her. In that moment she felt all powerful, like there was more than just her there to fight for Spike. As if she was infused with a possessive power beyond her and it made her foolish with it’s arrogance of surety of never losing her husband again.

“Yeah, try and I’ll eviscerate you slowly so you feel a pain like you never imagined.”

SB hung up on her and Buffy laughed again.

“Mum, do you think you really should have pissed her off? Because I don’t think that was such a good idea.”

Flopping back on the bed Buffy groaned and covered her face with her hands. It wasn’t a good idea and she knew it but at the time she wanted the upper hand and to show SB that she wasn’t afraid of her.

“Okay, next time you play his wife because hey, insane over here, and shouldn’t be allowed to piss off other insane people in a fight over who has the biggest crush on the shrink.”

“Funny, very funny; you’re not insane just a little unwell.”

They both giggled, remembering an old Matchbox Twenty tune that they had seen the video for on VH1 Classics the previous day. It had become a joke among the kids to label Buffy as unwell every time she said something about going insane. Raven cuddled into her side, entwining their fingers together.

“Are you going to call Daddy and tell him?”

“No, he’s signing starts in a couple of hours and he’d only blow it off to head home. I think we’re okay for right now but I am going to call Max. Let him know and get some advice. I’ll tell Spike this afternoon when I talk to him but let him do what he needs to do without worrying about us anymore then he has to.”

Buffy stirred enough to find the phone again and to dial Max’s cell phone number. It rang five times before she heard fumbling as he clicked the phone on and wrestled it to his ear.

“Max here.”

“Hey, Max, it’s Buffy. Can you talk?”

“Just a minute, let me get out of his hallway.” There was a moment of just him breathing in her ear before he came back on, “What’s up?”

“She called the house.”

“Shit. What happened?”

Taking a deep breath and trying to stay in control, she relayed the conversation to him then told him of her decision not to tell Spike.

“Buffy, you need to call him.” He hesitated for a moment. “I agree that you all are probably fine for right now but you need to call him in case she’s in New York. It was most likely from the show last night that she found out he had a wife. It made me cringe when they talked about you. Didn’t think about warning him in advance.”

“I’ll call you back,” Buffy hung up as her hands began to shake. There was no staying in control now, thinking about this woman that might attempt to take her life away from her. Her fingers wouldn’t cooperate as the tears filled her eyes and gratefully surrendered the phone to Raven. Buffy kept telling herself to breathe and that everything would be all right as she watched Raven dial the phone.

“Come on, Daddy, answer the phone,” Raven muttered as she brushed her mother’s hair back from where it was sticking to her wet cheeks. “Hello, Daddy? It’s Raven.” Silence for a moment and then, “Yeah, like no, duh, I know, I’d better be the only girl that is calling you Daddy.” A pause before, “Look, SB called here this morning. We’re fine but Mum probably pissed her off so you need to be really careful today. Hold on.” Raven handed the phone to her mother.

“Spike, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to do it. I just didn’t think and I wanted her to know that she wasn’t yours.”

“Shhh, Buffy, calm down, Lamb, it’ll be okay. It’s already arranged. There’s going to be a couple of guards there. Barney already planned it. It’s more to cover their ass if something does happen and someone else gets hurt. Liability and all that. What about you all? What did she say?”

Taking a deep breath, Buffy told herself to get it together. It wasn’t doing any of them any good for her to be hysterical. She had her children to think about and Spike didn’t need to be worried about them. When she felt that she was in control, she answered him.

“She told me to stay away from you and that you belonged to her. I threatened her back and she hung up on me. I called Max…”

“You called Max before you called me?”

“I didn’t want to worry you. Then he said something about me putting you in danger and I hung up on him to call you.”

“Whatever, Buffy. Look you need to call the police and let them know what happened. Okay?”

“Are you mad at me?”

“I need to go. Do me a favor and keep the kids home today? I’ll call you as soon as I’m done.”

There was iciness to his voice and Buffy could feel it down in the core of her. She sniffled as she wondered what she had done wrong. They always called Max whenever SB made a move because he had connections to keep the investigation going.

“I love you, Spike, and I’ll talk to you later.”

“Bye, Baby,” Spike, hanging the phone up without saying he loved her.

Handing the phone to Raven for her to hang up, Buffy snuggled down under the covers and hoped that sleep would come back so she could lose herself in oblivion. They had been down this road before and it hurt that he would even for a moment think that she would choose Max over him in any respect.

The phone rang and Buffy reached over her daughter to answer it.

“Hey, I love you,” Spike said, his voice held a trace of contrition and his forgiveness was given as quickly as his return phone call. “It’s just that I’m so far away from you. It’s my job to take care of you and I don’t like anyone else doing it.”

“You’re the only one I want taking care of me. I love you, too.”

“Call him back and see what he says, okay? I’ll talk to you soon.”

Buffy knew that sleep was going to come anytime soon. Turning she tucked the covers around Raven, switched the light off and made her way downstairs. She made herself a cup of tea before settling on the couch and turning the morning news on. She called Max and he agreed with Spike’s advice on keeping the children home from school for the day. It would also give them time to put into place the tracing of anymore phone calls to see if they could find out where she was calling from and finally find the stalker.

~~~~~~~~~

November 30, 2007 1:24 AM

Once again Buffy was the only one awake. The day had given no new phone calls or leads to who the woman was. No one said it but they were afraid that she was heading to California to press her case with Spike. The children had been excited about not having school and they had all spent the day being together. They talked about Christmas and wanted to get a tree to decorate that weekend to start the celebrations. Over all it had been a good day and everyone had gone to bed relatively happy. Except for Buffy. She wandered the house in slow circles, Candy following behind as she stopped at each window, peering out, her mind playing games with the shadows that crossed the yard. There was no rest for her tonight.

When her mind wasn’t making monsters from nothing, she thought about her children, her husband, and the baby that grew inside of her. She thought about her friends and the dreams she once had. She recognized and accepted the fact that she was letting go. From the time her mother had committed her, to the catatonic state after Glory and finally to the depression that had led to her cutting Buffy had always known the day would come when she would eventually break. How many times did she have to fight herself to stay in this reality? Even now she sometimes still longed to be able to return to Heaven. The peace and contentment she had known and couldn’t find here. The closest she came was in Spike’s arms, when he was inside of her, filling her, thrusting, and pushing her to an ecstasy that no one else had ever been able to give her but it wasn’t enough. Not anymore, as the darkness threatened her.

She couldn’t admit it to anyone, the secret that she held, that one of the reasons to keep her baby was that maybe she could finally let go. It wasn’t that she wanted death or even insanity but that she wanted to find an end. The last year had taken its toll on her and everyone and she was frightened. When she sat down and thought about it, her life overwhelmed her and it was too much for her to handle. Losing her mind would give her a reason to fail and it wouldn’t be her. She could finally lay fault to something outside of her control.

These thoughts only came as she drifted through their house, where in the darkness all her secrets could be inspected; even the ones that were horrid and pushed her soul to its limit. And the ones that could never be admitted during the vivid reality of her life were frighteningly loud in the night.

They were just thoughts, whimsical almost in nature, brought on by stress and worry and would vanish in the morning light or when she looked at her children or when Spike was there. Always Spike. Her link to life now and she wanted him home to banish the weakness in her soul.

The front door closed softly and she ran through the kitchen into the hallway to see who was there. Almost like an indulgent genie had granted her wish there stood Spike; putting his bags down upon seeing her and holding his arms out to catch her. It was all right again. The depression vanished like morning mist upon seeing the sun. His lips caught hers in a voracious hunger that she matched, no hesitancy, only urgency, born from knowing. Gone were the days of ignorance of what would bring the greatest pleasure as they needed no words to find the way. There was no fumbling, falling into the kiss, second nature now, needing as little thought as opening their eyes in the morning.

Spike picked her up and started up the stairs.

“All the beds are taken, the study,” Buffy whispered, her hands cradling his cheek and her teeth nibbling on his neck.

Once there, the door safely locked behind them, they disrobed while watching the other. No time to tease as she pushed him down onto the couch and straddled him. Sinking down, taking all of him into her in one movement, she found her purpose and direction again. Gone were the desires to leave as she rode him. His arms encircled her and she leaned backwards so that she was bowed beneath him so that he could devour her breasts, sucking and biting as her fingers kneaded his upper arms, her hair flowing across his shins, reaching downward, straining to tickle his feet.

This was hello and everything she needed as they molded their flesh into one. Her soft cries as he laid her on the floor so he could have control again, her legs hooked over his shoulders, his eyes locked with hers as he drove them to find that place that belonged only to them. Spike filled her and hammered against her innermost core and she hoped he would never stop. Everything was forgotten except the beating of their hearts, the unceasing force of their coming together and the sweat that coated his chest and slid along her thighs. The smell of them filled her senses as Buffy threw her back and looked at the room upside down. Her nails dug into the carpet below her and she felt the burning across her shoulders as she was slowly pushed toward the wall by the power of his thrusts. Grunting resounded in her ears in harmonized tunes that came from both of them.

Naked and vulnerable she lost control under her husband, letting the splendor of their joining, take over her senses as her orgasm made her quiver and clench down on him. Words were beyond her as she tried to find a way to breathe again. There was wonder dancing along her nerves as she grabbed onto her anchor, staring into the depths of his eyes, cobalt in desire, and somehow she melted, lying languid beneath him as he poured his essence in her. He jerked and shuddered in his own cumming, slipping from her when it was done, her feet back on the floor and his face buried between her breasts.

Spike laughed as her hands fluttered across his shoulders.

“Hello, Baby, I’m home.”

Her giggle joined his as they accepted that this was it for them. This, their love, manifested in the physical sense, could bring the greatest power between them. It could chase away their fears, bring them joy, unite them into creatures of heaven and create life. It was their love and it was their barrier to the rest of the world. And here in each other’s arms the rest of the world slipped away as they worshiped each other.

“So, I see,” Buffy whispered. And for a while longer she was whole again and ready to fight to stay that way.

TBC