Spike is just chipped and Buffy wasn’t there for him to turn to. He ended up turning to his Grand-sire for help and protection because he still hasn’t found out that he can fight demons. Chapter 5.
Buffy has never met Angelus or ran away to Los Angeles. She has been under the protective, watchful eye of Angel ever since she came to Sunnydale. Even when she ran to Daytona she was under the protection of Shelia. Prologue and Chapters 1 & 2.
Angel is dealing with being in the Alpha male role in a family again with a soul impeding his natural instincts and having to share the one girl he has ever loved with his Childe.
This has given them intensity to their emotions and reactions in these first few days of them being together. I feel that all of your concerns and questions will be answered as the three of them muddle their way through their decisions and their lives back in Sunnydale.
Chapter 10 – No Turning Back
The sound of weeping was heard as soon the hotel room door was open. Spike looked
over Angel’s shoulder to see Buffy in the middle of the bed with her face
buried in her hands. His heart ached for the girl and although he would never
admit it he regretted his involvement in her pain. As Angel hurried over to
comfort her, Spike sat on top of the dresser and immediately lit up a cigarette.
“I’m sorry, Buffy, so sorry,” Angel said as he pulled her against him. His hands moved across her back unbeknownst to him mimicking Spike’s exact movements not thirty minutes before. Spike looked away because it appeared to him that Angel was erasing away the fact that he had ever been there.
“I love you. I just want to be with you.” Buffy tearfully told her boyfriend as her small hands moved randomly over his chest.
The blue eyes returned to the scene being played out before him and tried to push his conscious away from it. The couple kissed so tenderly and with so much love that Spike could only watch in fascination. He had spent a century with Drusilla and yet he couldn’t remember them having the purity of such a love. There had been devotion and love and passion but it had been tied up in so much pain and her madness that it could never be what these two had. It made him jealous and hopeful that one day that he would be included.
“Would you like to stay here another night and we can talk this out?” Angel asked making Buffy’s face light up in joy. “Go fix your face and we’ll go get some dinner for you.”
As Buffy kissed Angel again quickly and darted off toward the bathroom, Spike watched her as she moved past him without saying anything. A short while ago it had been him that had given her comfort and security and all it took was Angel to be there for him to be forgotten. For just one moment he almost regretted bringing them back together but if he hadn’t then he would never know the touch of Buffy’s hand and the pleasure of her body. He wanted those now as much as he did Angel’s. Slowly his heart was becoming entangled by this slip of a girl and he was afraid of the pain that she could wield if she only knew.
From the corner of his eye he saw Angel stand up and he turned back to watch the older vampire approach him.
“Thank you.”
At first he didn’t respond but only took a deep drag on his cigarette before putting it out. After exhaling he reached out and pulled gently on the lapels of Angel’s jacket. Nuzzling his face first with his nose Spike inhaled the scent of his Sire letting it ignite the flame of his desire. It was something that he would never understand, this attraction, this need, that only Angel could fulfill. It went beyond preferences and choices to something that only could be explained by the feeding and the blood. A link that could never be broken handed down from one sire to another. It was more than sex and love; it was even more than heart because it was who he was inside.
But now it was even more and it confused him to no end. There was almost caring in the hands that cradled his face and reverence in the lips that devoured his own. Spike wanted sink down into the emotions the other vampire was invoking in him as he was pulled close to the comfort of Angel’s body. It was Spike that deepened the kiss into a passionate embrace as his hands cupped his Sire’s ass pulling him between his legs. Time and place was forgotten as their tongues wrapped around the others, playing, dancing, stroking and they could feel the other respond as their cocks strained to the other one so close to their own.
“Oh,” Buffy gasped as she came out of the bathroom.
Spike pulled back and leaned against the wall while his hands tugged at his jeans to make himself more comfortable. He watched as Angel stepped back with, for a fleeting moment, an expression of guilt.
“Don’t,” Buffy whispered as she ducked her face shyly. “I’ve been hearing the two of you together since the first night. And now to see you together, it’s…”
“Gross, eew,” Spike supplied sarcastically. His hands reached for his cigarettes again refusing to look at her. It was inevitable that her opinion would be heard and his relationship with Angel would be thrown behind closed doors for good. There was no way Angel would stand up to his little darling and let her be sullied by the unnaturalness of their relationship.
“No, Spike, it’s not.” Her voice was soft but assured. “I’ve been getting used to the idea since you two came to Daytona. And like I said I’ve been hearing you and walking in when you were done.” She hesitated as if to find the right words. “It makes me feel jealous and I admit a little weirded out seeing you together but in a way it’s also beautiful, too.”
Relief flooded through his body at the honesty in her tone. She was a constant source of surprise for Spike and when she did things like this it battered at the small defined slot that he had put her in. And it was in these times that his heart gave in a little more.
Spike glanced at Angel who appeared to be just as surprised as he was to Buffy’s announcement. It was good to know that Angel didn’t know her as well as he thought he did.
“Hey, I’m trying. Besides its not fair.” Buffy said as she moved closer to them. Spike reached out to take her hand, drawing her willingly down on to the dresser beside him.
“What’s not fair, pet?”
“That you have to see me with Angel and Angel has to see me with you. Why shouldn’t I have to see the two of you together?”
“It’s more than ‘having to see”, watching two people together can be erotic.” Spike leaned closer to her ear gently pulling gently on the lobe with his teeth. “Don’t deny that you felt a twinge when you saw us. Look, at Angel,” His hand was drawn along her thigh. “Every time that I touch you it turns him on.”
Spike pulled away from her to lean back against the wall as he watched Buffy’s and Angel’s reactions. They were both staring at the other with lust simmering behind their eyes and awareness taking hold of how good it was going to be between the three of them. Sometimes it’s just too easy, he thought. Then to further draw out the anticipation with them he hopped off the dresser.
“Let’s go get some dinner. I’m feeling peckish.”
~~~~~~~
The hostess showed them to a table for four but Buffy didn’t feel comfortable
sitting in the middle of the crowded floor, “I’m sorry, miss, but
can we have that booth in the corner?” She pointed at a circular booth
away from the other people.
“Sure come on, if I was as young as you are, I’d want them the two of them next to me and alone,” the hostess joked as she led them over. As they were sliding in she asked, “Do you know what you would like to drink and I’ll go ahead and put the order in for you.”
“Coke,” Buffy said.
“Draft beer,” Angel said.”
“Beer for me too and do you all have those onion things?” Spike asked as he held his hands up to demonstrate what he wanted.
“Sure do, so one coke, two beers and an onion thing, coming right up.” With a smile the hostess walked away leaving them to look over the menus.
“What?” Spike asked because Buffy had made a face when he ordered the appetizer.
“You’re going to have bad breath.”
“Angel never complains about my breath.”
“Fine, but you are so not kissing me until you have done some damage control.”
Angel looked up at them as they played and allowed the corner of his mouth to curl slightly. His hands were busy shelling peanuts then piled the peanuts onto a napkin for one of them to eat while sweeping the shells onto the floor. They must have been waiting for him to step in because he suddenly realized they were both staring at him.
“What’s up?” Angel asked as his eyes flickered from one to the other.
“I think Spike was waiting for you to defend him.”
“Staying out of it. We’ve got other things to talk about.”
“Let’s go then. Let’s talk and get it over with.” Spike said.
Spike was getting that petulant tone again as if he didn’t really want to deal with this and Angel knew why. He was waiting for the decisions to be made that would prove his theory that he was just going to be there for a convenience and not an active part of the relationship. No matter how many times Angel tried to reassure him, Spike’s insecurities kept surfacing.
“All of us need to talk and to contribute to this, otherwise I’m not going to be comfortable with any decisions that are made,” Buffy said as one hand went to cover Angel’s and the other went to rest on Spike’s thigh. “And that’s how I want all the decisions concerning the three of us to be made. Together.”
“And if the three of us can’t reach a decision together?” Angel asked.
“Then I think we can defer to your judgment,” Spike said hating the fact that he felt like he should put a ‘sir’ on the end of his sentence.
“Agreed,” Buffy said.
“Sounds like the two of you were making decisions without me.” From the time it took for Spike to find him earlier, Angel knew the two of them had talked. They had talked about him and his role in the family. He knew he couldn’t act the dominant role that he once did. Actually he didn’t even want to and knew that a lot of it was the soul. It was like Spike had said. The soul would never allow him to treat Spike the way that Angelus did. As for Buffy, he would destroy himself before he would ever try to break her the way that he had Drusilla. He didn’t want her broken. He loved her strong, fighting and if he had to admit it, he also loved the feisty, defiant side of her too.
“No, Angel, we weren’t,” Buffy said. “Spike explained the family relationship to me a little more and it’s not that we,” she stopped for a moment when she felt Spike tense, “it’s not that I don’t respect your role but to make my own decisions was one of the reasons I left home. If I move in with you and you’re making all my choices I may as well keep living with my mother.”
“And you Spike?”
Angel could see the walls around Spike springing up rapidly at his question. Unfortunately, before he could say anything the waitress came by bringing their drinks and Spike’s appetizer. Their orders were given for dinner and by the time the waitress left, Angel didn’t think he could get an honest answer out of Spike no matter what he did. His Childe had hidden his heart again behind his charming playful exterior as he teased Buffy about her breath when she started to help herself to the appetizer. He knew that he had helped to foster a lot of Spike’s self-esteem problems and now a century later he wasn’t sure how to undo it.
“Fine, we discuss things but I’ll pull rank if I feel it’s necessary. Deal?”
When they both smiled at him and nodded he felt a mixture of pride and love at their relief. It seemed easy to please them and that was what he wanted to do. His Mate and Childe were so wrapped up in his heart that he knew he was a lucky man to have them.
“What else while I am still in an indulgent mood?” Angel asked.
Spike continued to pull the petals off and eating them as Buffy seemed to be working up to something else.
“Come on, Buffy, say it.”
She looked over at Spike and then back to Angel. “I haven’t discussed this with Spike so I don’t even know if he agrees with me.” Spike’s head shot up to look at her as if to ask what she was getting him into now. “I want him and me to handle our relationship. I know there are boundaries and stuff but on the day to day things, little things, I don’t want you deciding things or interfering. Let us deal with it.”
“I promised him that we weren’t going to cut him out.” Spike said softly.
“No, not cut him out but okay, you used the example like my mom to show the parental role that Angel has but then, not to be gross but, then we are like the kids. My friend back in LA had this huge family and their parents told them unless it involves violence and blood don’t bother them. If he yells at me about where I squeeze the toothpaste, I don’t want you to jump in. Let me yell back. If it’s serious and we can’t handle it then we go to you.”
“Agreed,” Angel said. “I have a few things. One, you are my mate and you will show me that respect especially outside the family. Two, Spike is my Childe and deserves respect for being a part of this family. Spike, I told you yesterday that you are to give Buffy the respect she deserves as my mate. And I will give you both my respect and protection. This family will come first before anything else and it is to be defended above all else. You are both important to me and I want you to take these bonds seriously.”
“Understood,” Buffy said.
“Fine by me.” Spike said. He turned to smile at Buffy and in a sing-song voice said, “Buffy has to respect me.”
Their dinners were brought by this time and silence fell as Buffy and Spike began to eat. Angel sighed as he thought of what they were really venturing into and knew that although they were talking now there was going to be a lot of rough times ahead as they actually began to live together. A lot of rough edges that would need to be smoothed out but he was confidant that there were going to be a lot of good times too.
“Anything else? Spike?”
“Nope, I’m perfectly content at the moment. Have some good food, gonna get to shag a virgin later,” he said.
Angel was about to say something but fell silent as he remembered the deal he had made just a moment before. He watched as Buffy back-handed Spike across the shoulder.
“Can you be any cruder or mean? And who said we were going to do anything tonight?”
And Angel relaxed as he realizes that her gesture and words are more playful than angry. In that moment he saw the beautiful woman that Buffy was becoming; able to adapt to someone who was not always the easiest person to deal with and see the motivations behind his actions and treat him with consideration.
“Oh, sorry, Love, I thought that was why you were complaining about my breath. And you did say and I quote, ‘then we fuck’.”
“I was joking.” Buffy defended herself as she turned back to her food but looked up slowly when she realized that Angel was staring at her. “Angel?”
“I’m not going to rush you and neither is Spike but I think we need to start moving this relationship forward since we have all decided that this is what we want.”
For a moment the young and vulnerable girl reappeared as she leaned back and closed her eyes. Angel hated to put pressure on her but there was selfishness there, afraid that in tomorrow’s light she would have changed her mind and once again he would be holding air. Once she allowed herself to take the next step he was sure that she would have no more doubts about him or Spike. He watched as a slight flush covered her cheeks and slowly she opened her eyes again.
“Tonight then. I didn’t go through all that pain of getting that tattoo for nothing.”
“I’ll kiss it and make it better,” Spike promised.
“Not if I beat you to it,” Angel retorted. Even he was surprised by the comfortableness that allowed him to joke with Spike over Buffy. His possessiveness was slowly waning under the revelations of the last week.
He noticed that the flush on Buffy’s face grew deeper as she realized what she had just agreed to and that within a few hours she wouldn’t be a virgin anymore. The whole thought was scaring her but he watched silently as her hand was covered and squeezed reassuringly by Spike.
“Buffy, I promise you that I’m not going to rush you or try to get you to do something you’re not comfortable with, okay?” Spike said and Angel silently thanked him for his consideration.
She nodded and leaned over to kiss Spike quickly on the lips. “Thank you. I appreciate it.”
The rest of dinner they only discussed things that were less confrontational or daunting as they both tried to get Buffy to relax. On the walk back to the hotel her hands were held by both of them as they continued to joke with her. Suddenly Spike stopped.
“I’m going to go pick something up. I’ll be right back, okay?” Spike said before he kissed Buffy softly and then after a quick look to make sure no one was around he kissed Angel, too. “Wait for me.” He smiled and hurried off in the other direction.
“Wonder what the hell he is up to?” Angel asked as his arm was slipped around her shoulders and they continued to walk toward the hotel.
~~~~~~~~
The heat of the bath water was relaxing her as Buffy closed her eyes and forced
herself to think of anything but what was going to happen in a few minutes or
when she could work up the courage to go out there. As soon as she and Angel
had walked through the door, she had muttered something about wanting to take
a bath and here she still was.
Spike had returned a few minutes ago and she heard their muted voices through the door. She would be giving her body to Spike. Her mind seized on the memory of only yesterday when she had walked out of a similar bathroom to find Spike stretched out on the bed with his hand wrapped around his cock. His hand had been slowly stroking it and the look on his face was one of intense pleasure. Buffy wondered if she would be able to put that same expression on his face.
There was a soft knock on the door and her eyes flew open while her heart started pounding.
“Buffy, it’s me,” Spike called. “Can I come in for a second? Need to do some damage control.”
She sank down below the bubbles and called out in a shaky voice for him to come in. After closing the door behind him, Spike thankfully just headed for the sink to brush his teeth. It seemed to take him forever to complete the chore and Buffy suspected he was stalling.
“You okay,” he asked without turning around, his head bowed and hands planted on the counter.
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’ll be out in a few minutes.”
“All right then, Love. We’re going to rent a movie to watch.”
“Thanks.”
It wasn’t hard to figure out that he was really telling her that it was her choice and her pace that would set the events for the rest of the night. With a sigh, Buffy gave up on her hiding out and stood as she reached down to drain the tub. After quickly drying off Buffy slowly began to work scented lotion into her body as she listened to the two of them playfully argue over which movie to put on.
Her mind began to muse that most girls got to be lost in the passion in the back seat of some car or on their parents couch with a boy who was all hot and sweaty and wouldn’t be able to even give her an orgasm but not her. She got to lose her virginity to a 130-year-old vampire with a century of sexual experience and the bonus was that his Grand-Sire and technically her boyfriend got to be there too.
She clutched her stomach as nausea threatened to bring her dinner back up. Eyeing the toilet she played with the idea of letting it go but didn’t think the sound of her retching would be a turn on even to a vampire.
After quickly brushing her hair she gave herself one more quick once over before rummaging through her bag to find the new sleepwear she had gotten for this occasion. She had wanted something a little more grown up than the stuff she usually wore. It was a white silk cami and tap set with green lacing around the bodice and legs. Before she changed her mind she pulled them on and told herself that everything was going to be fine.
Buffy took one more quick breath and opened the bathroom door giving a small gasp as she found out where Spike had disappeared to. There were candles everywhere, on the dresser, on the nightstand and on the table giving the room a soft glow. Her gaze settled on the two vampires who were both in the bed with the covers pulled up to their waists. She could feel her heart speed up and her body responded to her eyes feasting on their bare chests. They were both so beautiful and she couldn’t believe that they were hers.
She approached the bed and crawled up between them. She sat on the pillows and drew her feet up so she could slide under the covers and with natural curiosity she peeked to see what they were wearing. She settled down between them feeling them next to her.
Oh my God, I am in bed with them. I am lying next to Angel only wearing boxers and Spike is naked. Spike is naked next to me! Breathe Buffy. Just keep breathing.
Trying to be nonchalant she leaned back against the headboard but knew that her body was trembling. Angel shifted closer to her covering her hand in his larger one as Spike watched with those eyes that always saw too much. The television was muted leaving only the sound of Buffy’s breathing in the room.
“Relax; it’s all up to you. What you want when you want it.” Angel said.
“I want to but I am so scared that I’m shaking,” she told them unable to retain a tear as it fell down her cheek.
The two men exchanged a quick look before Angel hooked a hand under her knees then drew her down to lie next to him. Buffy looked up at him from her prone position as he half lay on her.
Just let go. It’s okay. This is Angel. The one you love. It’s going to be just fine.
Her fingers wound in his hair as he leaned down to kiss her. This was familiar as his lips moved over hers, his tongue requesting entrance to her mouth. Gratefully she opened her mouth as she tried to pretend it was only going to be Angel with her tonight. His hand kneaded her hip before moving slowly upwards to cover her breast and she arched into it.
The covers were pulled back as Angel pulled her upwards to lie on her side and instinctively she wiggled closer to his body. Just as her mind registered that an erection was pressed against her thighs, she felt Spike’s mouth on her upper back. He licked and nibbled between her shoulder blades and she shuddered from his touch. Regretfully she pulled her mouth away from Angel’s so she could gulp in air and try to catalog the sensations that tickled her nerve endings. From the mouth that was nipping at her shoulder blades, to whoever’s hand was kneading her bottom, to the mouth that was sucking on her neck, to the fingers rolling her nipple and the erections that rubbed against her.
The cami was pushed upwards as Spike’s mouth moved lower, leaving chilling licks along her spine. Angel finished pushing it upwards until it was bunched under her arms and his mouth descended to suckle her nipple into his mouth sending darts of desire down her body and into the core of who she was. Spike was tugging her tap pants down and his tongue lapped at the first separation of her bottom and when her hips bucked in need he chuckled at her response.
Am I doing something wrong? Why is he laughing? Is he going to lick my butt completely?
The questions kept racing through her mind as she began to feel out of control. She could hear herself panting and feel the sweat that was beginning to coat her flesh and she wished she had asked a lot more questions of Willow when she had lost her virginity.
Angel’s hand slid down her belly and into the waistband of her tap pants, hesitated for a moment, then slid down into her folds. Spike’s hand moved up her thigh and up under the hem of the pants.
“Open up,” he whispered as his fingers slid into her folds from the back and they were both there, their fingers separating and teasing. And synchronized one finger from each teased at her entry way before gliding in ever so slightly and together they drew back and slid back in.
Buffy gasped and moaned and her body responded instinctively and she lifted her leg to rest on Angel’s hip to give them better access to her. They continued the gentle thrusting until their fingers were completely imbedded in her and she wiggled around needing more and wanting more.
Am I making too much noise? Why aren’t they saying anything? Oh, my God they are both touching me and I like it? Shouldn’t this be wrong? Don’t stop. Why are they stopping?
Her eyes opened as Angel moved over her, raining kissed over her body, until he was devouring her mouth with his, as if he was ravenous and was only offered the leftovers of a feast.
“Go to him. It’s time for just the two of you,” Angel said as he pushed her gently onto her back and she felt almost alone until she realized that Spike was there to catch her. For the first time since they started his lips covered hers, teasing and coaxing her, as he prepared to make her respond only to him.
He kisses as good as he fights, so unpredictable. I love kissing Spike. How the hell did he learn to use his tongue like that?
Disappointment filled her when Spike moved back but then he gently pulled her to a sitting position.
“This must be uncomfortable as hell, all bunched up like that,” he soothed her as he pulled her cami over her head. “Go ahead and lie back down, Baby.” His hands moved to her tap pants and began to tug on them. “Lift up. That’s my girl. Get you all nice and comfy for this.” His words were reassuring her as if this was the most natural thing in the world. As if he cared for her and wanted her to remember this with only good feelings.
Buffy lay there and scrunched her eyes closed as they gazed at her completely nude for the first time.
Does everybody breasts flop to the side like that?Do they think I’m fat? Am I normal down there?
She felt him lie down next to her then his hand cupped her cheek, “Look at me, Buffy.” She opened her eyes and he looked so earnest gazing down at her. “You are so beautiful. I’m honored that an exquisite creature like you would let me this close to you.” His lips were so reverent against her mouth. “Don’t think. Just feel.” He commanded before he started to burn a trail of fiery kisses down her body.
Spike stopped only for a moment to tease at her breasts, suckling at each nipple in turn then sweeping his tongue along the underside before he continued down her belly. His hands softly massaged at her waist, her hips or along her thighs.
As she whimpered again, Angel was there to touch her. The way she had fantasized, he smoothed back her hair and whispered words of love to her.
“Open up for me, Love,” Spike said as kissed along her lower belly.
“I…I don’t know what to do.” She whispered her insecurities to them.
Suddenly he was there again, his body pressed to hers, making her mewl as his erection rested against her and unconsciously her legs opened again, wanting and needing something that she wasn’t sure of.
“That’s it. You don’t have to do anything. Not this time. All I want is for you to feel how good it can be. Ride it out.” Spike said.
Trust him. Just let go. They both want you. Angel loves you and Spike, oh my God, Spike doesn’t love me. I don’t love him. What am I doing?
His tongue swept along her vulva and her breath hitched. On the second sweep he separated the folds with the tip of his tongue and she clutched the bed covers. The third time he flattened his tongue allowing the roughness of it to hit every sensitive nerve along the inside and she arched up pushing her sex further against his mouth and then nothing else mattered except his mouth and her pleasure.
As Spike, licked, sucked, nipped and lapped at her, Buffy found herself sweeping toward an orgasm unlike any she had felt before. She had learned over the years how to bring herself some relief but what her hand did was nothing like what this vampire was doing.
The hell with losing yourself in the passion with some boy who doesn’t know what he’s doing. Buffy’s personal recommendation is to find a vamp with a hundred years of experience of doing this. Wait a minute, a century? Just how many people has he fucked?
Angel’s hand came to clutch hers as her body rushed faster toward fulfillment and her hips found a rhythm as they arched up into his face over and over. Fingers were thrusting in and out of her as his tongue slowly circled her clit.
“Yes, Spike, don’t stop, yeah like that,” Buffy babbled as she hit the peak and flung herself off. Her body shuddered around him and Spike slowed his movements until she had finished. Took a final lick and moved over her.
Buffy watched in fascination as Spike leaned over to kiss Angel letting him taste her on his tongue. A small gift for the man who would never be able to give her what Spike could. She smiled and touched Angel’s cheek wanting to be a part of this. When they broke apart she pulled Angel to her and kissed him.
“I love you,” she whispered.
Then she turned her attention back to the male who was cradled between her thighs and now it was time to give her gift to him. If it wasn’t for Spike she would never be able to be with Angel and he deserved this token given with an open and free heart. He deserved more than what he had at the moment and she didn’t delude herself as to some of his motives but she had seen the loneliness in his eyes and wanted to help ease it even if she didn’t love him now.
Buffy pulled him down to her, nuzzling his lips, and then softly lapped at his lips, tasting herself and Angel on them. She tugged his lower lip between her teeth and sucked on it while her hands ran over his back. Her eyes opened and she looked straight up into the confusion that danced in his as she ran her tongue along his teeth before moving to circle the tip of his tongue with hers.
In the moment she had decided that this was a gift she wanted to give him, the woman was brought forth and she felt her girlhood slip away for good. There was no turning back and when she heard the quiet intake of an unnecessary breath, she knew she only wanted to run forward.
