Chapter 37 – All that Glitters
The day had continued to hold onto the sunshine and
bright skies. It helped to keep Buffy moving despite the feeling of
hopelessness that existed just below the surface. After her decision on the
beach, she forced herself to act on it. Her list of morning chores had been
completed. She had changed into her clothes, including the baby blue top that
Spike liked. Somehow she had even managed to apply makeup and put her hair up
in a high ponytail.
Once she was satisfied that no one could tell by
looking at her that her life was destroyed, she decided to check in on her
parents. She had just slid the car into reverse and was preparing to back out
when the O’Connor’s black suburban pulled in behind her. The car was returned
to park before she climbed out to see what Angel wanted. He was smiling. An
almost giddy, happy smile and she shut down.
His arms went around her but she stood stiffly, too
afraid at this point to hope.
“He’s alive, Buffy.”
Buffy didn’t say anything or move. It was too much to
comprehend. She had to be dreaming. Angel moved to cup her face so that he was
gazing into her eyes.
“He’s alive,” Angel said again. “He’s in a hospital
in
“Is he all right?”
“They were still checking him out when I got the call,”
Angel said. “But we need to get down there.”
It hit her then. Spike was alive. Buffy started shaking
as she reached into her car to get her purse. She moved without thinking as she
headed for the suburban. Angel’s arm was around her as he opened the door for
her. He helped her to climb in and even fastened her seat belt for her. It was
cold. So cold, she couldn’t stop shaking and she wrapped her arms around
herself.
“Do you want a jacket?”
Buffy could only nod and Angel reached into the
backseat. He handed her his leather coat and she wrapped it around herself as
she stared out the window.
“Faith is calling everyone to let them know so you
don’t need to worry about it.”
“Emily?” Buffy said, as some reasoning returned to
her shocked mind. “Did they call Emily?”
“Yeah, they called her.”
“Good,” Buffy whispered, wrapping her hand in
Angel’s. She needed the anchor of his strength. “Angel?”
“Yeah?”
“I’m not dreaming, am I?”
“No, baby, no dream.”
She nodded and turned her gaze out the window. There
was very little conversation on the way to the hospital. Buffy was too numb and
too worried to make small talk and Angel was too busy concentrating on getting
them there quickly. Thankfully, traffic wasn’t bad and they arrived at the
hospital in record time. While Angel looked for a parking space, Buffy went
ahead and called the hospital to find out where Spike was.
“He’s in ICU,” Buffy said, her voice trembling as she
clicked off the cell phone.
“Don’t Buffy,” Angel said, covering her hand again.
“Don’t assume the worst until we know.”
As soon as the truck was turned off, Buffy climbed
from the vehicle. Getting to Spike was the only thing that mattered. Angel
stayed with her as they found their way through the unfamiliar hospital. Every
corner, new hallway or elevator was a source of frustration on Buffy’s over
wrought nerves. If it wasn’t for the comforting feel of Angel’s hand on her
lower back she was certain she’d go mad.
Even though it was only a matter of minutes it felt
like hours before they approached the double doors into the Intensive Care
Unit. Buffy gave a cursory glance at the U-shaped ward before she approached
the nurse’s station that was in the center.
“Excuse me,” Buffy said, catching the eye of one of
the nurses. “Where can I find William Nagle?”
“Are you family?”
Without a second thought or batting an eyelash, Buffy
switched the ring from her right hand to her left hand.
“I’m his fiancée,” Buffy answered, raising her hand
so the nurse could see.
“I’m sorry, family only,” the nurse said, turning
away.
“He doesn’t have any family in this country,” Buffy
said, reaching near panic at the thought they wouldn’t let her see him. “I’m
it.”
“Excuse me, miss, what’s your name?”
“Buffy Summers,” Buffy said, turning toward the deep
masculine voice. She found herself looking at an older gentleman with a
doctor’s coat on.
“I’m Dr. Thompson,” the man said putting a hand
toward Buffy. “I’m treating your fiancé. He was calling for you earlier.”
“How is he?” Buffy said, shaking his hand
automatically. “Is he all right?”
“He went through some pretty severe trauma. It looks
like the fall from the ship caused a concussion and a couple of broken ribs.
We’re not sure of how long he was in the water before he was pulled out. He was
lucky because the man who pulled him out had some medical training. They
performed CPR on him and got him breathing again. But like I said the length of
time in the water has given us a few problems to deal with. There’s an
infection in his lungs from inhaling the water. And he was dehydrated and
disoriented when they brought him in. We’re doing everything we can and we just
have to keep an eye on him.”
Buffy nodded, understanding some of it but some of it
was too much to deal with yet.
“Can I see him?”
“Yes,” Dr Thompson said. He turned to Angel. “And
you’re Buffy’s brother right?”
“Yes, I am,” Angel said, when Buffy was about to
protest.
It took her a second longer to figure out what the
doctor meant but it had already been taken care of. The nurse had been instructed
to allow them to visit Spike and his room was pointed out to them. The shaking
had returned as Buffy approached the room. Angel was with her every step of the
way and she gasped when she finally saw Spike.
Spike was always so strong to her. Never admitting to
weakness and the image before her broke her heart. He was pale against the
white sheets and it was only the two day beard growth under an oxygen mask that
gave any color to his face. There was an IV in one arm, a blood pressure cuff
on the other arm, and some kind of monitor attached to his finger. A machine
was constantly beeping in one corner with numbers that were constantly
changing.
“Don’t let it scare you,” a young nurse said, coming
into the room. “My name is Shelia and I’m William’s nurse. The IVs are pumping
antibiotics and fluid into him. The monitor on his finger is keeping track of
his heart rate for us. It’s a problem we have with near drowning victims. They
can have irregular heartbeats so we need to keep an eye on it. He’s been in and
out of consciousness so don’t expect anything much from him. Just be warned
when he is conscious, he’s confused about where he is and what’s going on.”
“Is that from the concussion?” Angel asked.
“Possibly or it could be from oxygen deprivation,”
Shelia answered. “We’re not going to know for sure until he wakes up for some
length of time. If you want to hold his hand, do it on the side without the
monitor. Keep talking to him. He’ll probably know you’re here. If you need
anything, give me a call.”
With that she was gone. Angel pulled a chair over for
Buffy to sit on. She dropped her purse on the floor, took a seat and curled her
hand into Spike’s.
“Hey, Spike,” Buffy said, her thumb stroking the back
of his hand. “I’m so happy to see you. I’ve been worried about you but you just
had to go off on your own didn’t you.”
There wasn’t any response but Buffy continued to talk
to him. Little things about what she’d been doing without him, the sonogram of
Faith’s baby, the plans she had for the house. Every once in a while Sheila
came in to check on him, or to change the IV bags when they were empty. Usually
visiting hours were severely restricted but they let Buffy stay. They said that
since she had arrived and was talking to him, his blood pressure had become
normal so they bent the rules.
Angel left for awhile but came back with food for
her. He stayed with Spike while she went to use the restroom and breathe a
little fresh air. She gave a quick call to Emily to give her an update and
promised to call if anything should change. It was approaching
“No, I’m not leaving you.”
“Go home,” Buffy said. “Get some sleep. Come back
tomorrow with some clean clothes and stuff for me.”
“Look, I’ll call
Buffy quit arguing. She would feel better knowing
that he was close by. Since they wouldn’t let Angel stay in the room with Spike
and Buffy, he ended up checking into a hotel down the street. The nurse shift
had changed and a new nurse was now monitoring Spike. She brought a blanket for
Buffy who was still curled up in the chair next to the bed. Her hand was still
in Spike’s.
The quiet of the night had descended on the hospital.
The visitor’s were gone and the patients were sleeping. This was the worst time
for Buffy. It only brought back so many memories of when her mother had spent
months in the hospital. The jargon, the needles, even the catheter, was all
familiar to her. Once the nurse realized that Buffy understood a lot of what
was going into Spike’s care, they spoke more freely.
It was then that she found out that the
disorientation that Spike was experiencing could end up being permanent
neurological damage. It could cause him difficulty with concentration,
organization, memory or even change his personality. It could also be a
deciding factor in whether he could maintain a job and thus jeopardize him ever
getting a green card.
It was almost
“Spike, it’s me, Buffy. I’m right here. You’re all
right.”
“Where’s my mum?” Spike croaked.
“She…she stepped out for a moment,” Buffy lied,
unsure of what to do but knowing she didn’t want to upset him anymore. “She’ll
be back in a minute.”
“I want my mum,” Spike cried, his eyes fluttering
open. They were filled with fright as he glanced around the room. “Where am I?
I want to go home.”
“I know, baby, soon,” Buffy said, soothingly. She
stroked his forehead while keeping an iron grip on his hand. “They just need to
watch you a little longer and then I can take you home.”
“I don’t want to be here,” Spike said, his eyes
filling with tears. “It all hurts. Why are they hurting me?” His hand reached
for the IV but Buffy grabbed it. She pressed the call button for the nurse as
Spike tried to fight her and sit up. “Stop it. I don’t want you touching me.
Somebody help me.”
Two nurses, one male, came running into the room.
“We are going to have to ask you to leave,” Sheila’s
replacement said.
There wasn’t a choice. Buffy backed up out of the
room, watching as they tried to calm Spike down. A shot was put into his IV
that she presumed was a tranquilizer. The adrenaline of trying to deal with
Spike died and fear was quickly replacing it. She cried almost as loud as he
did when they put wrist restraints on him.
She turned and ran. She kept running until she was
outside in the night air. There she crumpled onto the sidewalk. The pain and
exhaustion she was feeling overwhelmed her. Questions continued to run through
her mind as she rocked herself. What if his mind was gone? What if he didn’t
know who she was? What was their future if he couldn’t hold down a job? She
didn’t know the answers but she knew the truth. Her eyes rested on the diamond
ring that glittered on her finger and knew that in her heart she had already
made the vows that it represented. No matter what happened she would always
stand beside him.
to be continued…
