“Hello?”
The bathroom door creaked open and the woman popped her head in.
Leila started to laugh. “Another fight with Deryk, Gigi?”
Gigi glared at her. “Isn’t that why you gave me an extra key to your apartment? So I could get away from the fucker and come tell you all about how I hate him?”
“You two only fight so you can have make-up sex, and you know it.”
“Is that your professional opinion? Don’t charge me for this.” Gigi laughed as she sunk down to the floor. “He really does piss me off though.”
“Then break up with him. Life is too short for fighting everyday.”
“You know I love him. Things are complicated like that, ya know?” Leila just nodded and took another sip of wine. “Must have been a tough day if you busted out the wine. I think that bottle has been in your cupboard since I met you.”
“I just bought it like a month ago, shut up. And yes, it was a rough day. I’ve decided I’m going to spend all weekend in the tub.”
Gigi got up and walked out to the kitchen to grab the rest of the bottle. “That’s fine for this weekend. But I already told you we’re going out next Saturday for Deryk’s birthday.”
“Why do I have to go? Deryk doesn’t even like me. Besides, I’m sure he’d be happy as a lamb with just you.”
“No fucking arguments. Saturday night, 10 o’clock, you better be ready to go.”
Leila rested her head on the back of the tub and sighed. “Whatever.”
* * * * *
Monday came all too soon and being at work was the last thing Leila wanted. The hours ticked by slowly and she found herself staring at the clock, willing it to move faster. Kristeen sauntered in and plopped down on the couch.
“You look like hell.”
“Happy Monday, Kristeen.” A fake smile plastered Leila’s face.
“No, really, what’s up?”
“If I tell you something, can it stay with just us?”
“Who am I gonna tell? Come on. Yah.”
“I went and saw him on Friday.”
Kristeen didn’t even need to ask who. She knew because she too had wondered about him. “And?”
“And he was just weird. Said he was all healed and crap and that he wanted to be my friend.”
“Okay, and?”
“I told him I couldn’t. And I left. I shouldn’t have even gone, but I seriously can’t stop thinking about him.”
“You’ve gotta stop.”
“Really?” she said sarcastically.
“Leila, get him out of your head. Any way you can. Pursuing it any further is gonna get you in a heap of trouble that you don’t want. And that’s just your career. Who knows if he’s gone all psycho now.”
“We don’t use the word psycho anymore. It’s disturbed,” she teased.
“Fine, disturbed, whatever. He may look sweet and innocent, but those are always the ones to watch out for.”
Leila rolled her eyes, but she knew Kristeen was right. Get him out of your head. He’s just a client. He’s gone, let him go.
As the week progressed, Leila had finally begun to remove Justin from her mind. It was his life to deal with from now on, she had no say. Saturday night came and she was completely ready for a bit of fun. Deryk wasn’t her favorite person, but she knew she could tolerate him for a night. Him and Gigi really did love each other, they just knew how to push each others’ buttons too well. Woofers and Tweeters was packed that night, like most Saturdays, which made it that much more exciting.
“I’m gonna get a drink, whataya ladies want?”
“White Russian.”
“Just a beer, babe,” she kissed his nose sweetly.
Leila couldn’t help but laugh at her friend. A week earlier she was cursing him to hell, now they were the cutest couple ever. Four or five rounds of drinks later and the party had finally begun. Gigi was always the center of attention, and if she wasn’t, she went out of her way to get it. She danced and rubbed on more than a few guys. Deryk stood nearby just watching. He always liked to watch. They were kind of a weird couple like that. Leila was far more subdued in her dance floor fun, but the alcohol had definitely kicked in and her inhibitions were gone. She danced aimlessly to the rhythm of the music, closing her eyes and enjoying the moment. Some random man behind her wrapped his arm around her waist, letting his hand fall just below her belly button. He matched his body flow to hers and Leila lay her head back on his chest. They danced like this for a while, her eyes only opening to check on Gigi once or twice. The rhythm of the music changed and Leila turned around to dance some more. Her grin turned to astonishment when she saw him.
“Justin,” she mouthed more than anything.
“I was surprised to see you at first too.” He looked her up and down, licking his lips in the process. “Haven’t seen you like this before.”
Her black skirt rested low on her hips, and her top dipped low into her cleavage. Suddenly, Leila felt very exposed and vulnerable. Justin’s smile only widened at her reaction. She headed quickly for the bathroom, hoping to somehow get away from this awkward situation. She stared at her reflection in the mirror as if for an answer. She closed her eyes and pictured his face on the dance floor when she had turned around. He planned it that way. What the hell is he doing to me? As she opened her eyes again, she was startled to see his reflection as well in the mirror.
“What are you doing here? This is the--”
“I don’t care.” He moved closer to her, keeping his eyes fixated on hers in the mirror. “You were enjoying it. My body next to yours.” He moved in closer, placing his arm around her waist like before. “You didn’t want me to stop.”
She turned around and pushed him back. “I want you to stop now.”
“But you don’t. You tell yourself that’s the right thing to do, but it’s not.” His hand grabbed hers and she closed her eyes.
“Justin, I. .” Her words trailed off. She didn’t know what to say.
“Shhh.” Justin placed his other hand under her chin and tilted it up. His lips met with hers and they opened invitingly. Aha, Defeat. After just a brief moment he pulled back. Her eyes were still closed - she looked so serene.
Another woman came walking into the bathroom and Leila could hear the loud music in the club. She snapped back to reality and looked into Justin’s eyes. “I can’t.” She walked back onto the dance floor and found Gigi and Deryk. She whispered something briefly to Gigi and then walked out to hail a cab. Sleep didn’t come easy that night. The incident replayed over and over in her mind until she thought she would go mad if the thoughts didn’t stop.
Her mind reeled from the weekend’s events. Everything was still so fresh in her mind, no matter how hard she tried to concentrate on work, the thoughts persisted. Very little work had been accomplished and it was already Tuesday. Kristeen walked in with a peculiar look on her face.
“Justin’s here.”
Leila never thought he’d come back here. “Tell him I don’t want to see him.”
“He says he’s back for therapy. He wants to see you again.” Leila didn’t respond. “He’s not going to leave until you see him.”
A lump was beginning to develop in her throat. Am I scared of him? Excited that he’s here? How can someone have this much power over me? She opened the door to the waiting room and a sly smile greeted her. As he walked into her office, his demeanor seemed far more cocky than she had experienced before.
Before they even sat down, Leila began asking questions. “Why are you here? What is it that you want?”
“You know why I’m here, doc.”
“If you’re looking for therapy, I can suggest someone just down the street.”
“Guess again.”
“Justin, I don’t have time for this. This isn’t a game.”
“Oh, but it is. You’re just not having any fun.”
“This is my career. My life. You don’t understand.”
“I’ll leave right now if you meet me at the park across from my apartment later. I just want to talk to you.”
She studied his face to somehow see if he was up to something. He looked genuine in his proposal. Then again, he always looked that way. Reluctantly, she agreed. Without a word, he was gone once again. Kristeen poked her head around the corner and Leila just shook her head and got back to work. This should prove to be an interesting evening if nothing else. When five o’clock came, Leila’s reluctance was evident. This was an obvious mistake that she was about to make, but there was no turning back.
It was a particularly dreary evening and the rain was falling hard. Maybe he won’t even be there, I can keep driving and not make this mistake. But he was there, just standing in the grass, sopping wet. It would have been a rather funny sight if she wasn’t feeling so awkward. She pulled up in front of him and motioned for him to get into the car. He didn’t move, only stared at her. Maybe he didn’t see me. Maybe he just ignores me. She grabbed her coat and threw it over her head as a make-shift umbrella. The closer she got to him, the more obvious his smile is. The smile of a mad man. He was taking far too much pleasure in seeing her scurry about in the rain. Nothing was said, they both just stared at each other, unsure of what to say. Well, Leila was unsure of what to say -- Justin seemed to be content not saying anything at all. Her coat was not helping; the rain continued to drench her.
“Come upstairs.”
“That’s not why I came here.”
“Are you sure?” He gave a questioning look before walking towards his apartment.
Every ounce of her being knew that this was wrong. Everything she was taught, everything inside her told her to get in the car and leave. But she couldn’t. It was like he had some power over her. She hated not being in control and somehow he could make her dance like a puppet. The elevator sat waiting while she slowly made her way to his apartment. When she opened the door, he stood there half naked and dripping. The door closed and her soaked coat fell to the floor. This was the very situation that she had been fighting. But no matter how much she knew she should leave, her desire for him was still stronger. As he moved closer, the scars on his body became clearer-- burns and cuts mostly. And somehow still, he was the most beautiful creature she’d ever seen. She surrendered herself to him that night, knowing that her world might very well crumble as a consequence.
