He ran his hand through the mess of dark curls, countless emotions running through his body. Happy that the memories were back. Sad that they were. Unsure of himself, her, their love. Angry. Frustrated. Tired. But most of all, scared. Scared of losing her.
Chris staggered over and the two walked back into the studio. Justin sat, still angry, against the wall, pretending not to notice as they rejoined the group. JC flipped through some papers on the table, trying to find where he left off.
“Where were we again?”
“Doing that sappy ass love song you wrote,” Justin snipped.
“Shut up, Justin,” Joey chided.
JC turned to face the young man. “No, tell me how you feel about it, J. I’m open to honest opinions.”
“You wanna know how I feel? I could go on for hours about your mediocre songwriting abilities.”
“This isn’t about the song, so say what you really mean. You’ve gotta get it out sooner or later. May as well be now.”
Justin sat forward in his chair. “You fucked me over. I’ve known you for more years than I care to count and I never would have thought you could pull this shit.”
“Are you done?”
“No. I’m not. You knew how I felt about her. You had to of known fooling around with her was wrong or you wouldn’t have kept it a secret. Friends don’t do that to one another.”
“I wasn’t trying to hurt you.”
“Well, guess what, asshole. You did. She did. Now I can’t stand the both of you. You did me wrong.”
“You need to get over yourself for just a minute. She didn’t come here to see me tonight.”
“It’s the same old shit, though, and I don’t wanna hear it. She would have told me how sorry she was and how she cares about me. I don’t fucking care right now.”
“You should care. Because she is sorry and she does care about you,” he sighed, pausing. “And because she fucking remembers.”
Justin shook his head, taking a minute to process the words. “What’d you say?”
“She remembers it all. And she came here to tell you that. If you would have put this anger aside for two seconds you would have found that out.”
Justin stood, grabbing his hair as he scolded himself. He met JC’s gaze across the room. “If you’re lying man, I will never forgive you.”
“Why would I lie about that? Despite what you think and what’s happened, you’re my friend.”
“Then tell me where she’s going.”
“I don’t know. She’s going on a shoot, but I don’t know where to. Stephanie just took her to the airport.”
Justin grabbed his cell phone and keys as he ran out the door.
“I guess that means we’re calling it a night, huh?” Chris tried to lighten the mood. “JC, you wanna hang out or something.”
“Nope.” He walked out of the room without another word.
*****
Frantically, he dialed the number on his phone, holding it between his ear and shoulder as he maneuvered in and out of traffic.
“Yah?”
“Is she with you?”
“Justin?”
“Yes. Is Abbey still with you?”
“No, I dropped her off at the terminal about ten minutes ago. Why?”
“Where is she going? What’s her flight number?”
“I don’t know the number, but it’s a 6:15 United flight to San Diego. What’s going on?”
He hung up the phone without answering. Thoughts raced through his head as he drove. The words he had said to her only a half hour before echoed in his mind. You’re not a part of my life anymore. I don’t want to be your friend. He scowled himself for not even hearing her out.
He parked the car, running furiously towards the terminal, stopping only briefly to check the flight monitor for her gate.
“Can I see your ticket, sir?”
“I don’t have one. I just need to find someone.”
“I’m sorry, only individuals with tickets are allowed past the security check. If you’re waiting for someone, you’ll have to stay out here.”
“Look, it’s an emergency. I need to get in there.”
“Like I said, only the flight passengers are allowed past the security check. If it is an emergency, you can try having her paged.”
Justin clenched his fists, turning around in anger. He slouched against the wall and buried his head in his knees as he tried to keep from lashing out at someone.
“Justin?”
Her voice captured his attention instantly. He stood up, looking at her briefly and then wrapping his arms around her.
“What’s wrong, Justin?”
“Nothing. Just let me hold you for a minute.” His eyes were closed, his arms wrapped around her shoulders. She rested her head in the nape of his neck just as she had always done before. “I thought I’d missed you. I thought you were gone and I wouldn’t be able to catch you.”
“He told you?”
“You should have told me.”
Abbey released her arms from around him, and slowly pushed away. “I tried. You didn’t want to hear it.”
“I was just mad. I’m sorry. We have all the time in the world to talk about it now.”
“But we don’t. I’m leaving in,” she paused to look at her watch, “twenty minutes.”
“You can’t possibly still want to leave now. Stay here, we need to talk. We need to be together.”
“This is my job. I have to go. This is a huge step for me, a momentous career step for me. Not to mention really good pay. And it’s only a short jaunt. I’ll be back.”
“Call them and say you’ll take a later flight.”
“I can’t, Justin. I’m sorry. I need to do this. I want to do this. This job makes me feel like now I’m someone special.”
“You were always someone special.”
A smile spread across her lips. “You always make me feel like I’m the only one in the room.”
“You’re the only one I see.” He leaned over, brushing his lips just barely over hers before kissing her. The flash of a camera caused the two to break their embrace, two giggling girls standing nearby.
“I have to go,” she picked her carry-on bag up that had fallen off her shoulder.
“Please don’t.”
“Justin, things are no different now than they were thirty minutes ago.”
“Of course they are. You’re back. We’re back.”
“Stephanie was right. You shouldn’t have known until I could decide.”
“What does Steph have to do with this? What do you have to decide? I love you, you love me. We go back to where we were the night of your accident.”
“There’s no going back, things have changed.”
“You can’t possibly love JC more than me.”
“I’ll tell you the same thing that I told him. It’s not about loving one of you more than the other. I love you both.”
“That’s a cop-out answer.”
“Maybe it is, but it’s the truth. You two were close. Long before I ever even came into the picture, you two were brothers. Don’t forget that.”
“Brothers don’t hurt each other like that.”
“Everyone makes choices. And we don’t always agree with those choices, but they aren’t ours to make. He loves you, and I know you love him. You need to work things out with him while I’m gone. Or at least try. Remember how things used to be.” Her hand reached out for his, holding it briefly before letting it slip away as she walked towards the gate.
Chapter 15: Remnants of Grief
Take Me Home!
