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Xander and
I stare at Giles in disbelief.
"You have got to be kidding me. We need you! We've got an Ascension on our hands!" I am at the end of my rope, between Dawn and all the Slayer stuff, and having Giles to lean on again seemed like a dream come true. But that's not what he's here for. I can't believe he would betray me so completely. I can't believe the Council got to him.
"Buffy.... you don't know how much I'd like to join you and your friends here in Sunnydale once again, fighting off evil together. But you've proven that you don't need me anymore. You don't need a Watcher. She does."
"Faith is a raving psycho! And you'd rather help her than me! She'll kill you, Giles, you know that?"
"I rather fear she is indeed a 'raving psycho' as you say. All the more reason she needs a Watcher. All the more reason I'm willing to do this, despite my falling out with the Council. And I am painfully aware of the risks."
"And you have no idea where she is?"
"None, I'm afraid. If I don't find her in Sunnydale I'll travel to Los Angeles. Then out East where she grew up... and then give up and wait for news, I suppose. If only I had known she was going to be released I would have been waiting for her."
"Maybe she never left town after she got out," suggests Xander.
"She checked into a motel with a bottle of wine, and apparently spent the night with some woman she met. She sounds self-destructive more than anything else. She and the other woman were last seen at the bus station. And that's where the trail went cold, I'm afraid."
"Well if you find her, tell her to stay the hell away from Sunnydale. If she even gives you a chance to speak before she murders you!"
"Buffy, I must ask you... if you do run into her, try to avoid harming her. If I can't work with her at all, I fear the Council is going to have her killed. Let me have a chance at her. Let me try to save her."
"If I run into her, I am not going to give her the chance to strike first. I'll try to leave her alive for you, though. No guarantees."
I thought things couldn't get any worse... and now Faith is on the loose! Giles falls silent and his face softens. He didn't want our reunion to become a fight either, I guess.
"I'm afraid I've got an even more pressing problem at the moment," he says.
"What's that?" I ask.
"No motel room. Would you mind a guest, just for one night?"
I manage a smile. "Of course not. Stay as long as you want. And I'm sorry about going postal on you. It's been a bad time. Dawn had some kind of breakdown and disappeared for a while... and now this Ascension thing... I guess I never really got my feet under me after I died."
"You'll do just fine, Buffy. You always have." He puts a comforting hand on my shoulder. "And of course I would lend a hand with the Ascension if I didn't have Faith to deal with. Let's all get some sleep, and tomorrow we can tackle our separate problems."
I stare at him, the most terrible thought forming in my head. "Our separate problems..."
"You have an Ascension to deal with... I've got to find Faith." He looks bemused at having to explain the obvious. And then his face changes. "Oh, dear!" He's thinking what I'm thinking.
"Faith gets out of prison," I say, "and suddenly someone's got the Mayor's Bug Box... a little too much of a coincidence, don't you think?"
"Well, I must say it has been wonderful to see you all again! I wish the circumstances were happier." The whole gang got together for a late breakfast at my house–except for Spike in his crypt, and Dawn, who was delighted to find Giles in the morning, but rushed out to meet a friend at the mall. I'd worry about her spending so much time out with this Feather lately, but she seems to be doing her schoolwork just fine. And she seems a little happier lately. Willow and Tara think the Boston trip did her some good.
Xander and Anya leave, and Willow and Tara sit down with Giles and I to make plans. We figure the best bet for finding Faith is to squeeze info out of the local vampires. She's a Slayer. If she's in town, the bloodsuckers will know.
The phone rings. "Hello?"
"Is this Buffy Summers?"
"Yes, who is this?"
"This is Sunnydale General Hospital. Your sister has been in an accident."
I rush down the halls so fast that the others can barely keep up. The nurse scurries after us, telling us what happened.
"You'll need to talk to the doctor, but so far it looks like she'll be just fine," he says. "She's regained consciousness, we've stitched her injuries, and we're observing her to make sure there's no permanent brain damage. Someone told the paramedics she was hit by a bus, but she has no broken bones. It looks like the other girl is the one who was actually hit."
"What other girl?"
"Your sister said she didn't know who she was. She ran in front of the bus and probably saved your sister's life. She's hurt worse. Broken ribs, probably internal injuries. A very brave girl."
We reach Dawn's room. "Dawnie!" I start to hug her and then hold back.
"It's OK, Buffy... just watch my shoulder." Her upper arm is bandaged, and her head. She's been crying.
"What happened? Where were you?"
"Downtown. I was coming back from the mall. I didn't see the bus coming." She turns to the nurse. "What about the girl who saved me? Is she going to be OK?"
"The doctor is with her now. We'll let you know."
Dawn looks like she's about to cry again. If something happens to this other girl, I know she'll blame herself.
"Dawnie, I'll go check on her right now, OK?"
Her eyes get wide. "No! Stay here. Please?"
"Go on, Buffy," says Willow, "We'll stay with Dawn."
"No, I..." she begins.
"I'll be right back! Promise!" I pat her hand and leave. Giles joins me.
"It's just one thing after another, Giles! What's next? They're going to take Dawn away from me! I just know it!"
"Now, now... take one thing at a time. This accident was hardly your fault."
The nurse is leading us to the other girl's room. He opens a door. Inside is the last thing I expected.
A cart full of expensive-looking equipment is tipped over on the floor, smashed, with an IV stand lying next to it leaking liquid. The bedding is all on the floor. The room is completely empty.
Jesus Christ! Oh God, it hurts!
I hang by my fingers outside the window, my broken ribs screaming with agony. I know I heard Buffy coming down the hall. I'd know that voice anywhere. So I tore out the IV and jumped out the window.
There's a gravel roof about eight feet below my feet. I'm about to let go when I hear Giles' voice through the open window. Giles? I thought Dawn said he'd gone back to England! I stop to listen a little longer, despite the pain. The nurse is bewildered, and runs to find my doctor.
"All right Buffy, I think I'll leave you here to find out where that girl got to. I've got to get started finding Faith."
What?
They know I'm free? They're looking for me? Shit!
I let go and drop, landing almost silently. God! The pain is blinding! But I don't cry out. Grimacing in agony, I make my way to a ladder and escape.
I get the door open and spring for the ringing phone. Ouch! I can't move like that! I shouldn't have even gone out. Gotta eat, though.
"Hell... lo?" Not only am I in pain, but I remember halfway through the word that I need to do my fake-mom voice in case it's Buffy calling.
"Faith? Is that you?"
"Dawn! How do you feel? My doctor said you're going to be OK!"
"Five by five. It hurts, but... what about you? You saved my life! You disappeared!" She's starting to cry.
"Sorry about that. Buffy almost caught me. I'm hurt kinda bad, but I'm a Slayer. I'll heal. Broken ribs and bruises mainly. No biggie." Hurts like hell, though. No IV painkillers now.
"I'll come take care of you!"
"You just take care of yourself, Dawnie. I'm fine. Five by five." Whatever that means. She says she got it from a movie.
"I'll call you when I get home from the hospital. Buffy's coming back to get me tonight. But Faith... guess what!"
"What?"
"Giles is back and Tara told me he wants to be your Watcher! Isn't that so cool?" Her tears give way to excitement.
If that's what Giles is really after... no, it's not cool! "Screw that! I mean... I know you like Giles, he's not a bad guy, but... I am not having a Watcher again!"
"But if you let him, I bet he'll stick up for you with Buffy! You won't have to hide anymore."
"I'm not going to hide forever. But no way am I doing the Watcher thing. Screw the Council."
"Jeez, all right. But think about it, OK?"
"Oh, I'll have nightmares about it, don't you worry."
"Are you really OK?"
"I will be. You just stay home and rest and don't piss Buffy off too much."
"I didn't tell Buffy you saved me. But we should tell her."
"We can tell her when I'm ready to face her. Not yet."
"OK, but don't wait forever." She sniffles. "Faith... I love you. Thanks for saving me. I'm so sorry you got hurt. I was really dumb."
"Hey... it's OK. You're all right. That's all that matters. I love you too, honey."
We both need rest now. I lie down on the bed and find a position that doesn't hurt too badly. Lying on my stomach is best. I think I'll be here for a while!
My eyes fall on the locked closet with the Box of Gavrok. As soon as I'm feeling myself again, I'm going to unlock that door and do what I need to do.
I don't feel quite right using the Books of Ascension. Probably never will. But the world is too dangerous for my Dawnie.
"Here you go! Dinner time." Dawn sets the tray on my lap. "Breakfast and lunch are in the fridge for tomorrow."
"I'm not helpless, Dawnie! You don't have to take care of me like this."
But I love it, and she knows it. She's been stopping by every day to bring me food, books, movies–and to crack the whip and make sure I study. I'm healing fast, but I can't go on patrol yet. So she doesn't want me wasting all this time!
She starts spoon-feeding me, and I let her do one spoonful before I remind her I'm not an infant. "OK, Dawnie, I think I can take it from here! How's your head?"
"Stitches come out tomorrow." She pulls her hair aside to show me. "Same with my shoulder."
Dawn goes to use the bathroom and the phone rings. She usually answers it herself, in case it's Buffy, but Buffy has never called. It's usually just somebody calling about something I've ordered from a catalog, or else some dealer trying to sell me a car. I'm tempted to just let it ring. But if it is Buffy, she'll worry. And Dawn is being very careful not to lose the privilege of coming over here.
Fake mom voice time! "Hello?"
"Hi, this is Buffy Summers, Dawn's sister, is this Feather's mother?"
Buffy! I almost drop the phone. How does that voice have such an effect on me? Thank God we're not meeting in person. And it's just plain surreal to hear Dawn's name from Buffy's lips!
For a moment I can't think what to say. "Yes, it is."
"I guess you've been seeing a lot of Dawn lately. I hope she hasn't been too much trouble!"
I see Dawn coming out of the bathroom. "Not at all, Ms. Summers. Dawn is always welcome in our house!" Dawn starts to snicker and covers her mouth with her hands. Another Boston flashback.
"Well I hope Feather can come here some night. I'd like to meet her."
"Oh, I'm sure you will!" I'm trying not to laugh now. Dawn is leaning in close to listen.
"Can I speak with Dawn, please?"
I put Dawn on the phone and pull a pillow over my face to stifle the laughing. God it hurts to laugh! And somehow I always seem to end up laughing when my girlfriend's around.
Dawn is still laughing a little after taking the phone. She can't hide it, so she pretends she's laughing at "Feather."
Then all of a sudden her face goes serious and she looks at me, worried. "OK. Why do you think she's dangerous?" I hear Buffy's raised voice in reply, but I can't make out the words. "But... OK. Fine. Well I'll stay here tonight. No, they never mind. OK. Bye."
"What was that all about?" I ask.
"Buffy's worried about me. She doesn't want me going anywhere after dark. So I guess I'll be staying over until morning. And guess why she's worried? 'Cause they know you're in town! Giles and Buffy think you're the one doing that Ascension thing! You better not keep hiding much longer."
Shit... Shit! "How do they know I'm in town?"
"They've been asking around. Some people–well, vampires–know there's another Slayer. And you've been seen near this building, she said! So they already think this is where you're hiding!"
Shit shit shit. I can not go moving someplace else right now. Not in this shape. Luckily I plan on staying in for a few days to heal, anyway. I just hope Buffy doesn't try to break in! And I hope nobody sees Dawn coming and going!
"Dawn, will you help me? I need to cover the windows and the crack under the door. It'll be dark soon and I don't want anyone to see my lights on."
She sighs. "OK, but Faith... the longer you hide out, the longer Buffy and Giles are gonna think you're doing the Ascension!"
"I know. I just need another week or two. Facing Buffy is really hard for me." Not to mention that I do have some things to be hiding... and they'll take at least two weeks to finish! Oh, God... what a mess.
Dawn and I cover the windows with blankets and cardboard, and then it's homework time. We make up trigonometry flash cards and she makes me get every one right before we can watch a video. Then she goes through the clothes I've bought her and picks out an outfit for school tomorrow. Finally, it's bed time. Normally I'd be out on the streets at this time of night, but I must be in worse shape than I thought: I'm actually tired already.
I lie face down and Dawn pulls the blankets over me and tucks me in. "Good night, Faith." She kisses my lips.
"Good night, sweetie. You take good care of me." She turns off the lights and takes a shower. I cannot help but notice her beauty when she emerges wrapped in a towel and goes to her room.
A while later I hear the springs of her bed squeak. Then, just as I'm drifting off, I hear her get up again and tiptoe back into the main room.
"Faith, are you awake?"
I am now. "Yeah."
"If I don't touch your ribs can I sleep with you?"
Why do I even have a bed for her? She never uses it. "OK. I'm not hurting that bad anymore anyway."
I move over a little and she slides up close to me on her side, putting one arm gently over my shoulders. She gives me a second good night kiss, and I can tell that she is not sleepy. Soon I'm wide awake myself, sliding my tongue over hers. Somehow her leg has curled up over my butt and the backs of my thighs. We're both wearing long t-shirts to bed, and her bare leg on mine stirs feelings that weren't really a part of our relationship in Boston.
She presses up against my hip, and holds the back of my neck for a kiss like nothing I have ever had. When she finally pulls away to breathe, I mutter, "Wow..."
She doesn't say anything but we're both breathing quickly.
The newly evolving physical dimension of our love seems natural and exciting... so why does it terrify me?
I'm not feeling half bad now, but I still haven't performed the next Rite of Ascension. Actually, the Mayor's instructions tell me to skip ahead a few rites–only certain steps are needed for immortality. He's left me potions and powders and magical artifacts, all the elements he spent so long making or gathering. I have a few jars spread out on the floor in front of me, and I know the words I must speak to bring forth their power. But still I hesitate.
In the middle of the clutter, the hairs I took from her pillow this morning are wrapped around some kind of skull–cat maybe?–along with some of my own. I reach out and stroke a stray hair of hers sticking out over one eye socket. Somehow it makes me sick inside to see any part of my Dawnie combined with these dark objects.
OK... reasons not to go through with this: it will piss off Buffy and Giles, and it just feels... evil. Reasons to go ahead: it will piss off Buffy and Giles, and it will save Dawn's life. If I don't do this, then one day I will face her death. Or she'll face mine. Probably sooner rather then later, what with her being the Key and me being a Slayer.
So it's an easy decision... just not easy to carry out. I can't believe how much I've returned to those days in Boston. Before I went rotten. Before I was evil. I need just a little of that evil now. I need the strength it gave me to do whatever the moment called for.
My ribs are gonna be tender for days, I can tell. I think I broke seven of them. But sometimes a girl just has to kill something. I'm out on patrol, trying to be careful, hoping that some slaying will help me feel like myself again. Help me go ahead with the next rite.
I'm at the old school now. Where Buffy blew the Mayor to kingdom come. In the library, right? I've only heard the story from Dawn, but I think so. That part of the building looks like it's almost completely gone. Curiosity gets the better of me, and I climb through the rubble that used to be Giles' library.
Along with the black marks of smoke and fire, there are dark green stains splashed on the bricks and broken concrete. The Mayor's demon blood? I touch one of the stains and shudder. Then I sit down in the weed-choked debris and silently ask the Mayor for the strength I need.
Something glitters underneath a twisted steel beam. Broken glass? I lean down and look closer. Metal. Very shiny metal. A shape I know well.
My knife. The knife the Mayor gave me. The knife Buffy almost killed me with. The knife she used to lure the Mayor to this spot.
Oh, how I want to own that knife again! I pull it free, wipe some soot off of it, and hold it up, inspecting the multiple cutting edges that make this weapon so deadly. So perfect.
The moonlight glints off of it, and I feel as though I'm back at the Mayor's side again. I know why I turned evil... I know why I'll never quite get the evil out of me. And that's good. I need just a little of that evil right now. Evil is strength.
I head for home at once, relishing the feel of the knife in my hand. I'm ready to take the next step toward an eternity with Dawn. How silly I was to hesitate!
I slip in the back, keeping to the shadows in the hopes that I won't be seen if Buffy has someone watching the place.
With the knife laid out beside the jars and skulls, I feel no hesitation at all. I speak the words, light the largest pot on fire, and drop the skull into it. Dawn's hair and mine vanish in a flash of blue flame. I add the contents of two other jars, and breathe deeply. The blue smoke fills my lungs.
It smells like what it is: ancient power.
~ Continue to Episode 4 – Beautiful ~
I would be grateful if you would give me your comments and rate my stories in my Guestbook, or email me. Reader responses will determine whether I publish more stories, and will help improve them! Thanks for reading! (If you'd like to be notified when I post new stories, let me know.)
If you enjoyed this story, try Witch's Faith. Feeling rejected by Tara and Buffy, Willow finds herself helping Faith get out of prison–and falling in love. When the dark Slayer's plots turn deadly, Willow must betray someone she loves. But who will she choose?
Faith walked out to Willow's car in a daze. She didn't truly believe this was happening until the prison gate closed behind them and they were on the open road. The afternoon sun turned to rain and it was the sweetest sound Faith had ever heard. She wished Willow would drive faster. A hundred miles an hour... two hundred! She was ready to slay–vampire after vampire turning to dust before her. And then she wanted sex... real sex, not a stranger's head between her legs in the bathroom, forcing orgasm quickly because privacy might end at any moment. Faith glanced curiously at Willow, wondering if the girl had ever had thoughts of homosexuality.
In the back seat, Faith found a bundle of lovely, wood stakes. The real thing! The Slayer took a stake in her hands. She caressed it, felt its perfect weight. Its solidity made the future suddenly solid as well. "Hey, Red... thanks."
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