~IF
ONLY~
If only
I could explain
The
anguish felt inside
Of parents,
who have heard the words
We're
sorry, You're child has died.
If only
you could understand
This
death is like no other
It is
not the same .... very different from,
The loss of
friend, or other.
If only I could
speak, the language of my soul,
Share thoughts
of him today
Then understanding
would dawn,
No words,
would you need to say
If only I could
make you see,
Listening,
is the best gift to me
The sound
of his name, is music to my ears
Memories of
him, not his name you say,
will
bring the tears.
If only
words could describe,
The
emptiness carried inside
Patience I
ask, as I learn to live again
All that I
require, is for you to be a friend.
If only
I would be given the time
To mourn
in my own way
Please
don't tell me to get on with life
For tomorrow
is another day.
If only
words could convey,
that it only
took a moment
For
my life to be rearranged
Please accept me for who I am today,
I have
been forever changed.
If only
I could reach but one heart
With
these words that I compose
Then
I will feel I've done my best,
And pray,
that compassion flows.
©JANUARY
2001 JODY SEILHEIMER
PLEASE DO
NOT TAKE WITHOUT PERMISSION
Before
losing my own child, I never understood the devastation of such a loss.
We sympathize, and do all we know to do to help, but until we have personally
experienced this type of death, understanding is out of our reach.
We as grieving
parents never expect you to understand, as most days we don't. We
just ask that we be allowed to go through this process to the best of our
abilities, without time restrictions, or judgments.
We will have
good days, and bad days, and what used to matter no longer does.
I have heard it said that this loss is of such devastation that it does
not even have a name. Lose a parent, you are called an orphan, lose
a spouse you are called a widow, or widower, but a child? There is
no name, that is how devastating and life changing it is...no words to
describe.
It may take
months, it may take years, and some a lifetime, to ever reach an understanding
of the loss of a child. This is a life long battle that we face each and
every day, never changing. We just pray for the strength to see each
day through the best that we know how, as we are given no other choice.
It is only through the love and compassion shown to us, by those dear to
us, that gives us that strength, and for all of those we shall be eternally
grateful.
