This is the day that the whole world turns green, unless you happen to be a die-hard protestant, then you turn orange, which is a very unattractive color on so many people...i mean, how many people do you know that, when asked, declare their favorite color to be orange? I don't know about you, but i can't think of any...but i'm getting off subject here...
St. Patrick's day...you've got your marches, your parties, your gay pride rallys...and it really doesn't matter if you've got to be at work the next morning, you go out and have a good time anyway...unless you're me. My whole life (oh God, not another Onyx life story...yeppers..deal with it.) I waited for the year that i would turn 21, knowing full well that a month and a half later, i'd be able to go out and get plastered with the rest of my brethren on that Day of Days in the Irish Catholic world. To be honest, i don't think that i did that last year, but...then again, i really don't remember. Wait, nope...i didn't. On review of last year's calander, i had to work that night..and now i'm vaguely recalling driving to Flannigan's (a local 'irish' restaurant) and then deciding that i really didn't want to be there...so, i was sober last yar on this day...This year, I'm on drugs that don't react too well with alcohol (i can't drink until at least three days after i stop taking it and tomorrow's the last day) so once again i won't be participating in the grand old Irish tradition...I think my ancestors are turning over in their graves. But, i'm sure next year will be different...unless i've sworn off alcohol for lent (ok, that's not going to happen.)
Right now, i could probably start making up my own version of the whole St. Paddy story (as i've done with Thanksgiving and Christmas), but i don't remember enough of what really happened to do that...All i recall from what i've been taught is that he drove the snakes out of Ireland. And there's really nothing funny or cynical about that, except for that fact that they all took residence here. But i'm probably the only one who finds that funny, because i'm the only one who knows what the hell i'm talking about...so, i shall translate...Snakes, usually pictured as having no limbs, they slither on their bellies and have forked tongues...also used in reference to politicians and other members of the homo sapien species...now read the sentence about them all coming here again, and i'm sure you'll die of laughter...ok, probably not.
Oh well, if you're out at the pub this eve, drink a pint for me...the closest i'm going to get to Irish this year is eating a bowl of Lucky Charms for lunch. But that won't be any fun, cuz they got rid of all the marshmallow shapes we knew and loved from childhood...pink hearts, orange stars, yellow moons, green clovers and blue diamonds (whether it's pathetic that i remember that or not i haven't decided yet.) with the later addition of purple horseshoes and red balloons and thos stupid pots of gold among others, all that's left are the pink hearts and blue moons (blue mooooooooon...you saw me standing aloooooooooooone... without a dream in my heaaaaaaaaaart...without a love of my owwwwwwwwwwn). But hey, acording to the box, they provide a good source of calcium (10% of your reccomended daily whatever), 12 vitamins and minerals...and, let's not forget...They're magically delicious! (R)
