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My Richard
and
Our Love Story
I have been blessed to be married to the kindest, sweetest, quite possably the craziest man I've ever met! We didn't fall in love at first sight. When we met I was 15 and he was 20. The difference between those two ages seemed huge at the time. He admitted to me years later that he thought of me as a "Little kid". Oh how things change!
When we met in 1989 we were working at Camp Tecumseh-a Salvation Army summer camp. I was a nurses assistant, he was a counselor. He was on summer break from college on his first visit to America. I was getting ready to make the move from NJ to Texas, going into my sophomore year in high school. You would be hard pressed to find two more different people. But for some reason we "clicked". We became friends and stayed friends, writing letters after camp.
In 1992, as I was getting ready to graduate from high school, Richard made another trip over to the States-This time to vist me! Did we fall in love then? Nope! But things did change in our relationship. I got sick when Richard was there and instead of sulking about his ruint vacation he took care of me. Actually, he was so sweet and gentle with me that my grandmother informed me he must be in love with me! I think alot of people thought we must have some romantic involvment. But we were just the best of friends. I loved him with all my heart, knew he was someone I always wanted in my life. But was I in love with him? Nope. I think I felt that our relationship was too good to bring romance into it (I didn't have a very high view of romance at the time.)
So Richard went back to England, I graduated from high school and pretty much all hell broke loose in my life. Nope, not going into details here but my life was not great. Unbeknownst to me, Richard was also hitting a rough patch in his life. During this period of our lives is the only time we ever lost touch with each other.
1994 hadn't been an easy year. I had spent alot of time sorting my life out and just when things were starting to look like they were getting better I got the worst news of my life. My grandfather, my "Pop" who was the only father I had ever knows was diagnosed with lung cancer. By New Years Day he had been through one round of radiation and was in remission. By December of 1994 I had gotten my life back on track. I took stock of my life and realized what was missing-Richard. I had lost alot of things and alot of people in my life in the last few years and I was determined not to lose this dear friend as well. So I decided to send him a Christmas card. Only problem was I had no idea where he was living. I knew he had moved several times in the last few years. I finally came to the conclusion that the only way I could guarantee the card would get to him was to send it to his parents house. So that's what I did.
New Years Day 1995. I didn't know it but this was the start of the year that really changed my life. I was at home with my mom and grandparents when the phone rang. My mother answered and I could tell that whoever it was on the line, she was happy to hear from them. I wasn't surprised when she handed me the phone saying it was Richard. He had gotten my card and wanted to know if I would like company in the summer. He and his friend David had been planning a vacation for the summer. Up until Richard had gotten my card they were planning on going to Sri Lanka. But America won out and we were on our way to our next visit!
We were both a little nervouse about seeing each other after three years. People change and I knew I had certainly grown up alot. But changed or not, whatever had drawn us togther as friends was still there. Except there was more. Richard says it was because I wasn't a little girl anymore. I like to think it was more like fate. I can see myself for years going on this path, taking turns and twists that I wasn't sure where they would end up. If you have ever heard the song "I Came Straight to You" by Patty Loveless you know what I'm talking about. Anyway, all I knew was that I was looking at Richard in a whole new light. I suddenly noticed things I never did before.
The night that sealed our fate was a Sunday night, June 18, 1995 to be exact. We had went out in the country to a boat ramp that's miles away from anything. ALl you hear out there is the water lapping against the dock and the crickets chirping. We were just hanging out with David, talking about our lives, the past few years, nothing special. Then it happened. He took my hand. Sounds like not a big deal, right? Oh it was. We were just joking, he was pulling me off the hood of my car and dragging me around, acting silly. Except when we calmed down and came back to the car he didn't let go. And the whole time my mind and my heart where going crazy. My mind was screaming at me to take my hand back, telling me this was my friend. And my heart was happy, trully happy for the first time in ages. For the first time in a long time my heart won.
Taking Richard to the airport to leave was the hardest thing I've ever done. There's alot of reasons for that. One being, of course, that I was falling in love with him. But anothr was more complicated. My grandfather had gotten very sick again, not long before Richard came over. He'd been through two round of radiation and was getting ready to go for another. One night while Richard was there my grandmother called me early in the evening and told me early in the evening that my Pop was feeling real bad and if he didnt feel better soon we may have to take him to the hospital. Of course I couldnt sleep, being on edge, waiting for her call. Richard did one of the nicest, sweetest things for me that night, that I don't think I've ever thanked him for. He stayed up with me. Till 3 in the morning we stayed up talking and he did a great job of trying to take my mind off things. If I hadn't been falling for him already, that night would have made me!
Richard and David didn't go straight back to England. They had went on to West Virginia to visit a friend of David's. I was so miserable. I got called into work the day they left and spent most of that afternoon holding a sick child and crying right along with him.
About 3 days later I got a call from West Virginia. Richard had called me 'cause he missed me! I don't think my feet touched the ground for days! And he had more good news. He said we couldn't go that long without seeing each other again so he was coming back to see me in November. I think he also was hoping for another chance of seeing my Pop. He had always liked him, since he came in 1992 and my Pop took him out for the whole day, driving down to the water and showing him the Power Plant. That call was the brightest spot of my week.
Not long after Richard left my Pop and I had a talk. He said he wanted to know if I loved Richard. I said I didn't know if I did, but I thought maybe I could. My Pop was pleased by this, saying he knew we had alot in common and Richard would take care of me. Tne night after Richard left my grandparents had all the adults in our family over to their house and sat us down for a talk. The doctor say no more point for radiation and my Pop had a limited time to live. I know now that talk we had about my future with Richard was Pop's way of making sure I would be taken care of. I'm so glad we had it now. My Pop passed away July , 1995. It was just like he wanted, no hospital. He was at home with his family and we spent the day talking about things he had done and the man he had been. I called quite a few of our extended family to tell them the news but I saved one call for last.
I call this the "limbo period." The next few months were hard, but I had Richard's visit in my mind. Distance and time are hard though and I was getting nervouse. When the day came I was a bundle of nerves. It didn't help that we were both unsure. Both of us had that arguement in our head that you don't date friends. So we hedged around our feelings for the first few days.
Finally on Thanksgiving day November 23, 1995, we went out to the movies and then afterwards headed for the (surprise!) boat ramp. We talked and laughed and acted just like we always did and then it happened-we kissed. For the first time in my life it felt just like something out of a movie. Slow motion, spinning, everything. Withing minutes of the kiss we had both confessed our love for one another after almost 6 months!
I was still scared. Relationships weren't easy for me and I had millions of arguements in my mind why I shouldn't be doing this and only my heart telling me I should. The thing that finally got me to stop fighting my feelings, was the realization of what I would be passing up-The love of a lifetime. I had a friend ask me once how I could be so sure that Richard was "the one". Instead of giving the answer you usually hear-"You just know"-I told them the truth. That from the first time I felt his lips on mine, I knew that I never wanted anyone else to kiss me again. That doesn't come along more than once.
Richard asked me to marry him on March 8, 1996(after having bought the ring almost 3 months before-the day I left London to come back to Texas!) and we were married on May 31, 1997. The happiest day of my life.
So there ya have it! Our love story. There's been alot more craziness since then, with me moving to England and us moving back to the US. But this is enough for now. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did!
Pictures of Me and My Sweetheart
About Me
The Winds of Change
My Kids
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Email: JennTheIcePrincess@yahoo.com
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