Scenes 31-34
Now here's 31-34 blah, blah, blah - have fun
Oklahoma
Scene 31: Ruby steps out of her private jet
Johnny: Ruby! You're back!
Ruby: Damn, now I remember why I left.
Fran: You bitch. How dare you smash my piggy bank.
Ruby: Oh shut up (slaps Fran) I've got jetlag.
Fran storms back into the house
Fran: (mumbling) Who does she think she is?
Johnny: So Ruby, you're back!
Ruby: Yes well. Do remember I can just leave if I want to.
Johnny: I'll behave.
Ruby: (VO: Yeah right. He'll probably start chasing me again. At least I know he runs like Fran.)
Johnny: Hey do you know what happened to Billy? My mum thinks I've buried him again but forgotten
where….again…
Ruby: You used to…(VO: What should I expect from a munchkin like him?)
Billy pops out of the jet
Johnny: Billy! It's great to see you. You are in so much shit with Mum.
Billy: Ya ya ya. Where's Ruddy?
Ruddy (Billy's horse) gallops up
Billy: Ruddy! It's great to see you.
Ruby slowly slips away
Johnny: Oh wait Ruby. Come back, we have so many things to catch up on!
Ruby: Yeah, like keeping a distance from each other!
Johnny: Ruby!! Please. You can come to my place and…have tea!
Ruby: (puts on a fake smile sarcastically) That'll be just dandy!
Johnny: Great. 7:30 (runs off)
Ruby: Little twit.
Mel and Pat rush out
Mel: (VO: This is so cool. She's rich!! Money!!)
Pat: (VO: Why did Johnny have to marry Mel. She's ugly…and I'm a princess…)
Mel: Ruby! How've ya been? Great. Now there's something I want to talk to you about. You're rich and
everything-not that that matters to me or anything-so obviously you're gonna need an accountant.
Someone to watch over your millions. And who better to take care of your money than me!!
Ruby: Uh, I've already got one, but thanks anyway.
Mel: But…(Ruby shakes her head so Mel walks away mumbling)
Pat: So how've ya been?
Ruby: Fine, and you? Anything happen worth writing about one day?
Pat: Well, not really. But Mel and Johnny…uh, never mind. Byeee!!
Pat runs off
Ruby: This place is filled with twits. TWITS!
Billy: Uh, so Ruby, do you wanna ride around for a while? Ruddy's feeling great! Aren't you buddy?
Ruby: Whatever…just to pass time.
Billy and Ruby ride around for a while
Billy: Watch Ruddy jump over this!! points to a fallen tree branch
Ruby: Whatever.
Ruddy jumps over nut his two front legs get caught ad they all fall. Ruby's arm hits the ground
hard.
Ruby: I'm watching…my arms hurting…ow, yes it hurts…
Billy: Oh no! Uh, we'd better go back to my place and fix your arm.
Ruby: Nuts.
Billy: I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to. It was an accident.
Ruby: Yeah yeah. It's okay. Just do something!!
Billy: Oh oh oh…um um
Billy helps Ruby onto Ruddy and they trot to Billy's house. Billy puts an ice pack on Ruby's
swelling arm
Billy: So, d'ya wanna watch TV?
Ruby: Whatever.
Both start walking towards the TV room until they notice Johnny sitting on the sofa laughing,
burping and scratching himself at the same time. They make a U-turn and sit down again next to
each other
Billy: Hey, Ruby. Why don't you just go on a date with him. (Ruby raises an eyebrow) I mean, he's not
gonna stop bugging ya 'til you do.
Ruby: You have a point.
Billy: I know! Go to Rusty's shed! It's a great restaurant and our dad owns the place so Johnny won't be
able to try any funny business.
Ruby: Yeah! That's a great idea. Thank you Billy.
Ruby kisses Billy on the cheek, gets up clutching the ice pack then makes her way to Johnny.
Johnny is heard shouting "Yes" as Ruby walks away showing Johnny dancing around
Johnny: You won't be sorry!!
Johnny sits back down
Johnny: Wait a minute! Rusty's Shed!!
Rusty's Shed
Scene 32: Rusty's Shed-a big barn with old, creepy tables and "moving" tablecloths. Ruby and Johnny are
sitting near the bar (a big wooden box with drinks in it)
Johnny: So what d'ya want? I know what I want.
Ruby: (VO: I bet you do.) Um, well, it'd be easier for me to choose if I had a menu to choose from.
Johnny's dad rushes out with a menu and hands it to Ruby
Ruby: Thanx Mr. Addams.
Johnny: I'll just have a milk.
Ruby looks at Johnny weirdly
Johnny: But, uh, put it in a dirty cup.
Mr. A: Righteo.
Ruby: I'll just have some white wine.
Johnny: Well father, you heard the lady. White wine. Chop chop.
Mr. A: Son, aren't you and Mel…
Johnny jumps up and slaps his hand over his dad's face
Mr. A: Oh. (winks at Johnny and leaves)
Johnny: (sits down) So Ruby, how has the past year treated you?
Ruby: Well, I have a couple of grade A movies under my belt, an Oscar, a mansion…shall I continue?
Johnny: Wow. So what'll you have?
Ruby: What's the steak surprise?
Johnny: Oily and oozy.
Ruby: I'll just have the salad then.
Johnny: (claps and his father rushes out) She'll have the salad and I'll…have the steak surprise with salad.
Mr. A: I thought you hated salad.
Johnny: No, that's Billy silly.
Mr. A leaves. Johnny stares and smiles at Ruby saying nothing. Ruby sits there with a weird look
on her face. Then they hear a cow moo in pain. Ruby's eyes widen.
Scene 33: Johnny and Ruby have finished their dinner. They are drinking and talking weird as they're both
drunk
Ruby: So the Jewish guy goes (hiccups) What are ya doin'? Then the Rabbi says (hiccups then falls
unconscious and falls onto Johnny who's already unconscious. Mr. A walks out and laughs.)
Mr. A: Crazy kids. (walks away)
Scene 34: Ruby wakes up on Johnny and screams
Ruby: Oh my gawd!!
Ruby runs away
Johnny: (squints at Ruby) Wow (falls unconscious again)
Scenes 35-38
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