Chapter 34
Buck watched as the nurse removed the bandages from Larabee’s hands. His eyes glued to the deep bruises and swelling that made his hands twice their normal size.
He knew she was soaking the injured fingers in Hydrogen peroxide in an effort to prevent them getting infected. He was grateful that his old friend was sedated and
would not feel the pain or burning sensation the soaking would cause.
“How are his hands?” he asked the grey haired nurse as she looked after the blond.
“A couple of the fingernails may be infected,” she informed him. “Dr. Parker will be here shortly and he’ll examine them.”
“What happens if they are?” Wilmington asked worry and pain evident in his eyes.
“We’ll have to remove them and treat the infected area.”
“Damn!” the moustached man hissed as he watched the unmoving figure on the bed. ‘Hey, Stud, you’re a mess right now but we’re gonna get you through it,’ he
thought as he struggled to keep his emotions in check.
He sat in the chair and thought back over the rocky friendship he shared with this man. Chris had always been so strong and it hurt to see him lying on the bed, the
wounds on his body reminding them all of the atrocities Whelan had inflicted on him.
Tom Parker entered the room, nodded slightly in Buck’s direction, before walking up to the bed. “How’s he doing, Tess?”
“I think you’d better have a look at his fingers,” she told him.
Parker lifted one injured limb from the peroxide solution and shook his head. “The index and thumbnails may have to be removed. Keep soaking them in the
peroxide and I’ll check them in a couple of hours.” he told her as he moved to check the other hand. “The same thing with this one. Has Dr. Midland seen these?” he
asked, indicating the fingernails.
“Not today. She’s in a meeting with Nephrology, Doctor.”
“Any idea how long before she’s through?”
“No, Sir, she said she’d be back as soon as they finished.”
“Any change in his urine output?”
“Hello, Tom.”
“Stacey,” Parker said as he continued to check the dressings that covered Larabee’s body. “How’d the meeting go?”
“Actually, Tom, there may be a bit of good news for a change.”
“Lord knows we can use some,” Wilmington whispered.
“What’s the good news Stacey?” Parker asked as he inspected the long gash in the patient’s side.
“It looks like there’s a marked increase in his urine output and his creatinine levels are dropping.”
“That is good news,” Parker said, frowning at the redness surrounding the wound in Larabee’s right side.
“What exactly does that mean?” Wilmington asked.
“It means we won’t need to resort to Dialysis if it continues to improve,” Midland answered before turning back to Tom Parker. She’d noticed the frown on his
forehead. “What’s wrong, Tom?”
“The area around the wound is swollen and hot,” Parker answered as he probed the area. “There’s definitely something there,” he told her as he felt a hard lump
beneath the stitched area. “Mr. Wilmington, you’ll have to leave for now. Stacey, could you give me a hand here? I’m going to open the wound and drain it. Tess call
ultrasound and tell them I want them here as soon as possible.”
“Yes, Sir, Doctor,” Tess answered.
Parker and Midland carefully opened a small area of the wound and took a swab of the oozing substance. “Send this to the lab for analysis right away,” Midland
ordered as she passed it to Tess.
“Hopefully nothing shows up,” Parker said as Midland passed him some gauze soaked in saline. They covered the wound with the gauze and hoped they wouldn’t
need anything more. His eyes strayed to the re-bandaged hands. “We may have another problem, Stacey.”
“What?”
“We may have to remove the nail on his thumb and index fingers on both hands.”
“Are they that bad?”
“Not yet but we’ll have to keep an eye on them.”
“How long before we let him wake up?”
“Well it’s noon now. Let’s ease up on the versed. It’ll probably take him a while to wake up.
Chapter 35
“Nathan, how’s Chris doing?”
“Well good morning, Vin.”
“Nathan,” Tanner’s voice was laced with exasperation.
“He’s doing a little better, Vin. Buck was by earlier and Dr. Midland said they probably wouldn’t have to resort to Dialysis.”
“Well that’s one piece of good news. Are they going to let him wake up soon?”
“Dr. Parker and Dr. Midland want to give him till this evening. They’ve got a few things to do for him before they let him come fully awake.”
“I wanna be there, Nate.”
“Vin, that might not be a good idea right now. Just because they’ve moved you out of ICU doesn’t mean you’re well enough to go moving around a lot.”
“Nathan, that’s not really what you’re worried about, is it?” the younger man asked, uncertain he really wanted to hear the answer.
“He’s been through a lot, Vin. The last thing he needs right now is to get upset.”
Tanner’s blue eyes filled with tears as he realized that Jackson was right. Whelan’s influence on Chris may have cost him the best friend he’d ever known. Chris
Larabee was the only person he’d ever let into his heart. ‘Oh, God, Cowboy, don’t let him take you from me. I don’t know if I can live with what they did to
you. I need to know that you don’t blame me,” he thought angrily as the tears flowed unchecked from his eyes.
“Easy, Vin,” Jackson soothed as he held the trembling man. “Things are gonna work out.”
“How can you say that. Nathan,” Tanner hissed. “Because of me my best friend may die. God knows he may never want to see me again and I don’t blame him. I
did this to him. Oh, I don’t mean I physically hurt him myself but if it hadn’t been for me Gary Wilcox wouldn’t have been so bitter. He wouldn’t have gone after
Chris at all except that Chris was stupid enough to accept me as a friend. Shoulda known better,” he sobbed softly against the medic’s shoulder.
“Chris will get better, Vin,” Jackson tried to assure the sharpshooter, his own heart aching with each tear that dropped from the younger man’s eyes. “He knows in
his heart that you’d never hurt him. He’s just twisted around right now because of what Whelan did to him. You just have to give yourself and him time. The healing
will begin for both of you as soon as Chris wakes up.”
“I don’t know, Nate, I just don’t know if I can face him after all this,” Tanner whispered as he pushed back from the caring arms of the medic.
“Why don’t you try and get some rest, Vin?” Jackson suggested, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
“Am kinda tired, Nate,” the sharpshooter’s eyes closed but Jackson could still see the evidence of the pain in the lines of moisture drying on his face.
“Things will work out, Vin. You and Chris need each other,” the medic said as he sat back in the chair to wait for the others to arrive.
Chapter 36
Chris could hear voices, incessant voices telling him to wake up, but he knew to do so would bring him only pain. He didn’t want to go back to that. Didn’t want to
face the betrayal by the one man he thought he could trust. ‘Why, Vin, I thought we were friends. I thought you were going to watch my back. Hurts so much,’
he thought.
“Come on, Stud, You don’t need to be sleeping no more.”
‘Buck, please don’t do this. I c...can’t come back. Can’t do it without Vin,’ the blond thought.
“He’s crying, Doc,” Wilmington said as he saw the moisture next to his friend eyes.
“Chris, it’s Stacey Midland. Can you hear me?”
‘Doc, I d...don’t want to. Please leave me alone.’
“Chris, you really need to open your eyes.”
‘Too much pain. Don’t want to come back,’ he grimaced as he felt the tube invading his throat and knew he was losing the battle to stay away from the pain.
Slowly, unwillingly, his eyes opened. The first face he saw was the moustached face of his oldest friend. ‘Buck, tell them to let me be, c...can’t go t...through any
more,’ he thought.
“Hey, Stud, bout time you rejoined the world of the living,” Wilmington grinned at the man.
“Chris, we’re going to remove the ventilator now,” Midland explained as she gazed into the confused eyes. “Don’t fight it, Ok?”
Larabee was in a world of misery. He didn’t want to be here. He didn’t want the memories of why he was here to return but he knew they would. He knew these
people would not let him sink back into the peaceful oblivion he’d been floating in. There was so much pain in his awakening body but he knew he could face that.
What he couldn’t face was the loss of his friendship with a longhaired Texan. Tears filled his eyes as he felt the two doctors removing the ventilator tube.
“Almost done, Chris,” Parker said as he pulled the tube the last few inches from the patient’s mouth.
Chris felt the tube leave his sore throat and he breathed deeply, crying out in a hoarse whisper as his ribs protested.
Midland knew the two milligrams of morphine wasn’t enough to hold back the pain the injured man was feeling. She took the morphine syringe she’d prepared earlier
and placed it into the IV.
The blond’s eyes grew panicked as memories returned along with the pain. Memories of the torture inflicted on his body. He lifted his head in an effort to look at his
hands. Terror shot through him as he saw the bandages completely enveloping them. “No,” he cried weakly as he was reminded of a friend who’d once lost a hand.
The stumps had been bandaged in much the same way as his hands were now. “P...please no,” his tortured raspy voice came out pitifully weak.
Wilmington cringed and moved forward. Trying once again to get his friend’s attention.
Midland placed her hand gently on the blond’s forehead and eased him back onto the bed. “It’s alright, Chris. I know you’re hurting right now but let the medications
work and they’ll help you sleep.”
“D...don’t w...want to s...sleep. W...Whelan b...bad d...dreams,” Larabee whispered as if the mere mention of the man would bring him back.
“Whelan’s dead, Chris, he won’t bother you anymore,” Wilmington told him.
“N...never be g...gone. Gonna p...punish me. V...Vin’s paying him, B...Buck. Vin hates me,” he cried as he started thrashing on the bed. “W...why’d he d...do it?
Oh, God, Vin, why?” his raspy voice was strong with emotion as he struggled to get away from the living nightmare.
“Vin’s not the one who hurt you, Stud. Now you gotta calm down and take it easy,” Wilmington soothed.
“N...no, have to d...die,” his body became taut as he struggled to get away from Buck’s voice. “K...killed them, Buck. I k...killed Sarah and Adam. Oh, God why
d...did I do it?” he cried as visions of the nightmare fire that claimed his family plagued his mind.
“No, Chris, you didn’t kill Sarah and Adam. You were out of town with me, remember?”
Larabee’s pain filled green eyes drilled into his friends. “D...don’t lie to me, Buck, Dammit just let me go. L...let me die. V...Vin says I h...have to die. Why, Vin, why
are y...you doing this to me?”
Tears filled Wilmington’s eyes as he listened to the anguish cries of his friend as they escaped his tortured throat.
“Stacey, give him five milligrams of Haldol. This isn’t doing him any good and we need to get him calmed down,” Parker ordered as he watched another spasm rip
through the tortured man’s body.
Stacey Midland placed a second syringe into the IV and deployed the contents. She watched her patient as his body finally relaxed and his eyes closed. “This is
going to take a lot of time and care, Buck,” she explained as she watched the angry moustached man.
“This should never have happened, Doc,” Wilmington hissed as he struggled with the emotional trauma of seeing his oldest friend’s injuries.
Chapter 37
“Hello, Vin.”
Tanner licked dry lips and slowly opened his eyes. The medications he was being given made it impossible for him to think clearly. He struggled to focus on the young
man seated next to the bed, “JD?”
“How are you feeling?”
“Pretty lousy right now, Kid. How’s Chris doing?”
“He’s still about the same as the last time you asked,” Dunne told him. “The docs are worried about his fingers...”
“JD!” Dunne looked up into the stern face of Josiah Sanchez.
“What?”
“Brother Vin doesn’t need to hear that right now,” Sanchez said angrily.
“Josiah, what are you guys keeping from me?” Tanner snapped as he tried to sit up in the bed. The pain in his chest and shoulder made him gasp and he sank back to
the comfort of the pillows.
“We’re not keeping anything from you, Vin. We just didn’t see the point in telling you about Chris’s fingers until we knew something definite.”
“Tell me now, Josiah,” Tanner hissed through clenched teeth.
“Alright, Brother. JD, go get something to eat,” Sanchez ordered as he sat in a chair next to the sharpshooter’s bed. He heard the door open and close and bowed
his head in silent prayer.
“Josiah?”
“Give me a second, Vin,” Sanchez whispered. Finally he opened his eyes and looked at the younger man. “We didn’t tell you because you have enough to worry
about.”
“Tell me what, Josiah?”
“You know Chris’s fingers and hands are in bad shape?” At Tanner’s nod he continued, “A couple of fingers on both hands have become infected and the doctors
are going to remove the nails today. It’s a very painful process but they’ll put Chris out for it.”
“Fuck, Josiah, why didn’t you let me kill the bastard while I had the chance?” Tanner’s soft voice did little to hide the anger he felt.
“If I thought it would’ve done any good I would have done it myself, Brother. Gary is a sick man and he will do time for what he’s done to you and Chris.”
“Why did he take it out on Chris, Josiah? Why didn’t he come after me? I was the one who broke my promise. Chris had nothing to do with it. Hell, Chris didn’t
even know him,” Tanner cried angrily.
“I can’t answer those questions, Vin. I can only tell you it isn’t your fault. None of this is your fault.”
“I wish I could believe you, Josiah, but I keep seeing Chris in that chair. I keep seeing the pain on his face. I keep hearing him cry out and ask me why I was doing
this to him,” the injured man’s eyes were glazed as he pictured the tortured body of his friend.
“Vin, you have to remember what Whelan was doing to him. When Chris starts to heal he’ll know it wasn’t you,” Sanchez told him.
“You didn’t see his eyes that day, Josiah. They were so full of pain but they were also full of sorrow. He really thought I was causing the pain.”