| April 22, 1999 | |
      
Listening to: Silence
Reading:
Plans for the Weekend:
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I am absolutely disgusted with the school system
I have been affiliated with for four (4) years.I went to appeal six (6) parking tickets today. Before I sat in front of the parking board (a secretary and some student who is younger than me) and tell them that because I come "home" late at night and there are parking spots close to my apartment hall (about 100 yards away), I park there instead of a mile away in a poorly lit, unmonitored parking lot for which I have a parking sticker. These two clowns didn't think it was their decision to say whether or not I could have special arrangements. Ok, fine, but no one thinks that it's their decision. I graduate in less than a month and I would love to think that I could actually treated like I'm more than an inmate in a place where I have lived for four (4) years now. Goddamn ridiculous!! I am so pissed off that I can hardly sit in this chair without wanting to turn over and vomit. Spit fire. On top of that, I had a most anxiety provoking dream this morning. Because I got sick this morning, I didn't go into work and so I slept until one (1) in the afternoon. Again, my stomach is taking the blunt end of the anxiety stick. Typical. So the dream:
I had to rollerskate to work, but I started from Tolland, the town I grew up in. There were so many highway entrance ramps that I was very confused and had no idea how I would get to work. At a bus station I ended up in, posters advertising sexual acts were hanging on the doors and windows of the building. I finally crawled into an overcrowded bus. Meanwhile, my mother and Rob were going to check out the apartment that J., Andrea, and I are going to probably get. I was talking to my mother on the phone and as she was telling me that she needs to teach me how to do the wash in a glass washing machine, I walked into a room that Krista, author of the online journal,Femme FATale, was inhabiting, though she was not there at the time. She was in the middle of painting her orange walls yellow.I woke up from the dream feeling very anxious, like, though I'm sick, I had to eat to save my life, I had to kill the silence in the apartment with Tori, I had to light the rooms. Not quite ready to jump out of my skin, I felt like I was missing something: a meeting, or a piece of clothing. I couldn't have told you what were the contents of my closet.
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