Part 32
Two weeks has passed
I try to say goodbye and I choke
Try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not near
Goodbye and I choke
I try to walk away and I stumble
Though I try to hide it, it's clear
My world crumbles when you are not here
--Macy Gray, "I Try"
Pulling my coat closer to my body, I wonder if I should have agreed to come here. Glancing around the park, I have to smile when two young children run past me. I wish that I could be a child again. Not having to worry about all my problems. Life just got too complicated.
Maybe I could stop making such a fool out of myself. Lately, that is all that I had been doing. I was still mad with myself for my behavior towards Danny. I had been so mean, so bitter at him. I had no idea what gotten into me. So, I was very surprised when Danny had called me a week ago.
I had really thought that I had did it. Yet, Danny had surprised me. Even in our marriage, Danny would always surprise me. One day, he had made me breakfast in bed, and then took me out on a shopping spree. That day had stuck out in my mind. Danny had been so attentive to my needs and he had made sure that I was happy.
I just wish that I had been nicer to him. Still, he was back in my life, more supportive than ever, and I had no idea what to do with it. There were a million things that I wanted to do. I finally realized that Danny was the man for me, but circumstances had gotten in the way.
I was still in awe that Danny would still be willing to stick by me. I was just too morified to see Danny when he first called me. I wondered what he must think of me. I had embarrass myself too many times, but Danny had never held it against me.
He always accepted every part of me. He managed to put me at ease. Still, I was determined to keep my distance from him, and actually, he agreed. So, for a week, Danny would call me every night before bed, and we would talk about everything and nothing. Our talks always put a smile on my face. Danny had never pushed me, and he politely kept his distance.
Then one night, he had suggested that we meet. I had quickly made an excuse. Danny sensed my uneasiness, and took back his offer. He kept apologizing. I felt so bad. The prospect of seeing Danny was too just confusing and thrilling at once.
So, here I was. I missed Danny. I just couldn't bear admitting that outloud. I had told everyone that I could do this on my own, and now, I was leaning on Danny's shoulder.
I needed Danny. I was starting to realize that now.
"Michelle."
I lift my hand to block the glaring sun. A smile touches my lips when I notice Danny standing in front of me. He is wearing a suit and tie. He just looks so handsome.
"Danny."
"I was beginning to think that you were going to run out on me." He says teasingly
I chuckle. "Well, the thought crossed my mind."
Danny moves closer to me, and takes my hand in his. My heart starts to beat a little faster. "Well, I am glad that you didn't leave, Michelle. I've missed you." He says in a whismical tone
"I've missed you too, Danny." I say softly
My eyes begin to trace the pattern in Danny's tie. "Michelle, I just wanted to say that I am sorry about--"
I cut him off. "Danny, it is not your fault. I don't know what has gone into me lately. I guess that everything is finally getting to me. I didn't mean to say those things to you."
Danny pulls me closer, so my head is laying against his chest. "I know, Michelle. This is not your fault. I just want you to know that I am here for you. You have so much ahead of you, Michelle. You just need to be willing to admit that you need help. There are so many people that can help you but you need to let them."
"I know." I whisper. It was so hard to admit that I couldn't do this on my own.
"You can do this, Michelle. I just need to pull yourself together, and believe in that. You need to believe in yourself."