Propriety
by Gail (gem225@hotmail.com)
Part 3 of the Mentor series.
Rating: adult
Please do not archive this story without asking me first. The copyright belongs to me.
Warning: A beating is given, and taken. Please don't read if you think that's going to bother you.
First version: Incredible betas: Mareen, Tinnean, Lexi, Kita, and Silk. Also great friends and wonderful people, but I'm not biased or anything.
Thanks to Tinnean for her beta and her support. I wouldn't want to do this without her, and if I did, I'd do it a hell of a lot worse.
*****
He's staring at me tonight from his seat on the couch in his apartment, smiling too, even though I'm just giving him a report on the mission he gave me: watching out for Douglas Carr. This is strange, but Mr. Alexander always has his reasons and I'm used to not knowing everything that he's thinking. I don't like it, though.
I finish with my flight back to D.C., which I spent five rows behind Mr. Carr, staying away from him as I'd been ordered, and fending off the flirtation of the stewardesses, and wait to find out if Mr. Alexander's satisfied with my report or not.
"Sit down, Tom." He gestures to the chair opposite his, and I sit. "Is that all on Mr. Carr? I thought you'd have more for me."
I wonder what's going on. I know what I did, but he can't know. I kept a very good eye out, and there were no agents watching me. I would have seen them. Mr. Alexander was in D.C. I called him there. So I'm safe.
"That's all, sir."
"That guy Carr spent time with. Did you find out anything more about him?"
He cannot know. I meet his eyes calmly. I'm IDD. I know how to do this.
"Nothing, Mr. Alexander. Just some college kid, from what I saw."
"Lucky kid. Carr's lovers speak highly of him. I've talked to a few."
I don't like how Mr. Alexander speaks about Carr's lovers. It almost sounds as though he's been one of them. It's over for me with Douglas Carr; there's no chance I could ever risk going to him again, but I have my pride and my memories and no one is going to take them from me.
I want both Mr. Alexander and Mr. Carr. I can't have either of them. What I can have is my job and my friends, and that will have to be enough.
"Have you been one of his lovers, sir?"
I'm first, and I get to ask the questions others don't, especially when it's just Mr. Alexander and me in his apartment.
He's laughing. "Good one, Stone."
My last name. He sounds fine, but that's some kind of sign, and probably not a good one since he was using my first name until now. I can't relax. That question was a bad idea, but too late to take it back now.
"No, I haven't been in Carr's bed."
He gets up and comes over to stand in front of me, and I stand, too. Respect, always.
"But you have," he says very softly, and his face is up close to mine. I can feel his breath on my lips. If I moved just a little, I'd be kissing him. I want to kiss him, but he's still talking.
"I saw you leave with him from that bar; hell, I saw you there with him. You take risks, Stone."
That could be a compliment, but I have my doubts. He's too close, and I'm getting hard, and his eyes look like they want to fix me in place. They do.
"I thought I told you to stay away from him."
"You did." I stay still. I don't have any choice.
"I'd like to hear what reason was so important that it got you to go against my orders and get into bed with the man I told you to watch and nothing more."
This isn't going to get any better, and I want to tell him the truth.
"I wanted him, because you wanted him."
His smile is slow. "Because you want me. I've known that, Stone. Always wondered if you were going to do anything about it."
I swallow. This conversation has seriously changed. "It didn't seem proper."
"You weren't worrying about propriety when you got into bed with Carr, were you?"
I wet my lips at the memories his words bring up. "No, sir." I wanted Douglas to show me what he knew, have that safety and passion with a man I thought I hated, but found out I wanted and even liked. I took chances, and I'm going to pay for them.
"I'm insulted that you went ahead with him when you wouldn't with me." He hasn't moved. I can feel the heat from his body, and it's getting me so damned hard. "After all, you are my student. Always have been, always will be."
That is something I know very well. It was one of the first things he drummed into Jack and me. We were his. I wonder how much that has to do with how I feel now.
"I asked you here to tell me about Douglas Carr." His voice is down to a purr. "But I don't want to hear you talk any more. Show me what he taught you. Now."
And he flashes that smile again as he steps back, and this time I do what I've always wanted to do with him, get down on my knees.
"How did he like it, Stone?" He's not stopping me as I reach for his zipper. "Did he fuck you? Make you suck him off? Or did he let you fuck him?"
"Everything, sir. We did everything." I swallow, remembering. I learned just how good he was, and now I dream of him too.
"Everything. I should send Carr a present. Some information he couldn't get on his own. Or maybe he'd like you again. You think so?"
I can't talk because I've got his hard cock in my mouth, licking, sucking, getting myself to remember what made Douglas moan, and finding that Mr. Alexander's a lot more controlled. It takes until I get the whole shaft in before he takes a breath that tells me I'm doing well.
"Yes, maybe I will send him you," he says after a long moment. "But right now you're mine."
His hands are buried in my hair, keeping me still, while he fucks my mouth. I love it. Douglas didn't do anything like that. He let me decide what I wanted, but I want this. I can smell Mr. Alexander, taste him, touch him, please him. My cock is harder than it's ever been, and I'm close to coming. One touch and I might go off, and I'm sure he doesn't want that. I don't either.
His hands take my mouth off his cock and pull me back up to stand in front of him. "Enough for now," he says coolly, but with a smile.
I can't believe this is really happening, even when I swallow and taste him.
"Strip. I want to see what you look like these days." His tongue sweeps over his lips and then vanishes into his mouth. "Then get on the bed. Take a position Mr. Carr liked you in when he fucked you."
He knows I went back there. He must have been following me, watching me while I watched Carr. He set up a relay for his calls, made me think he was in D.C. when he was right there. It was a test, and I don't even know if this means I passed or failed. Mr. Alexander used to tell us that success was survival, and I am alive.
I get out of my suit and hang it in the closet. He told me what he wanted, so I do it, get on my hands and knees. If this were Douglas Carr, he'd be on the bed with me, touching me, talking quietly, making me relax and want it. He took his time, made it good for me, said it was better for him that way.
I'm sure that Mr. Alexander doesn't want me relaxed, but he does want me.
I can feel the air move around me and I know he's come closer, even though he says nothing.
"Spread your legs," he says after a long moment, and I do. His fingers stroke my balls, and I make myself keep quiet. I don't know what he wants. "So Carr liked to fuck you like this?"
"Yes, sir." I know my voice isn't steady. How can it be? I don't know what he's going to do. Mr. Alexander could do anything, and will.
"I might fuck you," he says very softly and cups my balls in one hand and wraps the fingers of his other hand around my cock. His hands are warm and knowing, and I want more. I'm panting when he lets go. "But I'll bet there's some things Carr didn't show you. He's not into the same things I am. You were wrong about Carr. I don't want to fuck him or anything like that. I want to use him, make him into a source for information, my source. You came to the wrong conclusion."
That always means discipline. Back in training it would be extra work, papers to write, cleaning, laps, less sleep, but he's got me on my hands and knees and I don't think he's going to ask me to explain how the falling of the Berlin Wall changed the structure of Europe or tell me to shine his shoes over and over until I can barely focus on them.
There's a soft sound that I can't place, and I'm trying to stay still because something is going to happen.
Then something cracks across my ass, hard and painful, and I can't help jerking away from it. My hair is grabbed, and I see Mr. Alexander's face lean in.
"You wanted me," His eyes are glittering, his lips wet, his face flushed, and I want to whimper at the thought that I got him to look like that. "This is what I like. Are you going to try to run away now? I wouldn't, Stone. You won't make it out of the room, and you'll pay for trying."
"No, sir," I whisper. The pain fades into heat. Mr. Alexander wants this, and he wants to do it to me. "Go ahead. I can take it."
His mouth twists into a feral grin. "At least you remember something of what I taught you. Good."
He straightens and lets go of my hair, and I brace myself. I don't want to move again. I have to take this.
The next blow is harder, but I stay still. My cock should be soft, but it's getting harder under this. This wasn't part of training. I'm glad of that. It's something that he and I share, now. Not Jack, not Riley, not Evans or Murphy or Kingsley or Harrison. Just me. I'm the only one who knows how it feels to have Mr. Alexander beat him.
"You still want Carr?" His voice is cold and mocking. "Thinking of him now?"
"No, sir."
"Liar." He strikes me once, twice, three times in a row, and I'm gasping when he finishes, my skin burning. "You want him, and you're thinking of him. I know, Stone. I know everything about you. Don't even try to lie to me again."
"No, sir."
I get ready for another blow, but what I get next are fingers shoved into my hole, and I cry out. Lubed, but rough, no stroking or waiting for me to open. Next I feel something being fastened around my cock, just as rough as the fingers, but he's touching me, so I don't care. I thrust into them, but they're gone too soon.
"Don't want you to come before me, do we, Tom?' My first name again, and his voice has laughter in it. "I hope he taught you how to beg, because that is what you're going to have to do if you want me to let you come."
He's trying to break me, I realize, but what he doesn't understand is that I'm already broken, have been for years where he's concerned. "He didn't teach me to beg."
He answers by grabbing my shaft and pumping it. "You'll beg," he assures me when I start moaning. "Unless you like being frustrated. And I know you don't. You hated every time I shut the door on you, didn't you, Tom? You wanted to stay with me."
All I can do is moan. Yes, I hated it. Yes, I wanted to stay. Yes.
He shoves his cock into me with the same kind of roughness as his fingers, and I feel like I can't take it until he hits my prostate. Then I want it rough and hard and violent, just like he's already doing.
"Did Carr fuck you this way? Did he make you cry out?"
He's demanding answers. I moan. I can't talk now. He's rubbing against my ass with every thrust, and with the heat from the beating he gave me, it's too much.
"Did he make you beg?"
"No." I'm answering all of them. His laugh in reply tells me he knows that.
"You really love this. This is what you're good for, sucking and getting fucked. You're just a whore, Tom, but you're my whore." The possessiveness in his voice almost makes me come as he keeps fucking me. "I'm not sending you off on any missions for a while. You're going to stay here and show me why I shouldn't throw you the fuck out of the IDD for your mistakes."
Something in how he says that gets through the haze he's put me into with the fucking and the beating. He wanted me to go to Carr. He set me up. He knew me, knew what I wanted, made it so easy for me to fall. He wanted me to fuck up. And now he's punishing me for it, and fucking me into tomorrow, and promising me more.
This has to be what success is, in Mr. Alexander's world.
Success for him, that is. Not for me. I know that no matter what, he's going to make this out as my failure, and I don't care. I'm still first. No one else is here to get the benefit of his words or his belt or his cock. Just me, and I'll never tell anyone what happened here.
"Whatever you say, sir." It takes so much to talk.
I hear him laugh, feel him pound even harder into me, and I can't even picture Douglas's face or think what he'd say about this, because I'm Mr. Alexander's now, the way I never thought I could be.
Right now I'd betray Douglas Carr if that would make Mr. Alexander smile. He'll probably tell me to do that.
I groan and feel Mr. Alexander fucking me even harder. I'm getting what I want, but at what price?
Just everything. But then all I have is because Mr. Alexander chose me all those years ago. And now I'm paying for it.
I hope I'm the only one who has to pay.
*****
Posted 12/9/03
To the interlude that follows part 3, Betrayed
