The Appeal of Desperation
by Gail (gem225@hotmail.com)
from Michael's pov, part 2
Rating: adult
Please do not archive this story without asking me first. The copyright belongs to me.
Thanks to Tinnean, Nomi, Beth, Elizabeth, Scarlet, Karen, Mandy, and Greg for their time and support, and to Tinnean and Elizabeth for their betas.
*****
I shut the folder, tossed it onto the pile on the floor that I'd already gone through, and thought about getting a shot, then frowned. That was something my father would do, and I wasn't going to be like my father, who found his comfort in whiskey and women and his bank accounts. I had a good life, and plans and ambitions to make it better, and I'd get what I wanted. I always got what I wanted now, however how long it took.
I went to pick up the next folder, but there were no more folders. I'd have to find something else to do. It was ten past nine, too early to go to bed. I could read. I had more than enough books that I hadn't bothered to crack. Or I could watch a movie. I had a pile of DVDs from my last shopping trip. Maybe 'Casablanca' would be good, or 'The Big Sleep'. Or I could put on one of the CDs I'd picked up the other day by this woman Kate had said she liked on our last date, even though from the little I'd heard her voice seemed more likely to put me to sleep after a cut or two.
I didn't really want to do any of those.
I drummed my fingers on the arm of the couch, then made myself stop.
I hated being bored.
I wouldn't be bored if Kate were here, but she'd turned down my offer of dinner to spend the evening with her upstairs neighbor, Laurie, doing whatever women do when they got together, and since she wasn't a good enough liar to fool me, I was sure that she wasn't with Brian Cameron, her other beau. He really needed to learn that he was no match for me. I knew what I'd seen in his eyes when I'd met him. He wanted to be competition.
I'd get some water and think about what to do to amuse myself. Maybe I needed to go out for a drink or two, see about finding a woman who was easier to charm than Kate, and take her to bed.
As I stood, the doorbell sounded. Interesting. The only person I could think of who'd visit me was Kate. Maybe she'd finally come to her senses.
When I opened the door, I found that my visitor was Brian Cameron, looking tired and determined and like the loser he was. I kept my smile on. Here was a remedy for my boredom. Either he'd come here to convince me to give up on Kate, or to try to be my friend, and I suspected from what I'd learned about him that it was the latter. He'd open his heart to me and expect that I'd respond to him just as openly.
Right. But I'd enjoy his look of frustration when I made it clear to him that his offer and sincerity meant nothing to me.
"Brian. What brings you here?"
"May I come in?"
His face was composed, but I could see the nervousness he was trying to hide, and that amused me even more.
"Certainly."
I took a step back and, on a whim, bowed my head and upper body as he walked by me. He gave me a startled look, and I held in my laugh as I straightened.
He stood in the middle of the room, and I knew that I'd have to make him feel a little more welcome so that he'd get on with his self-appointed task.
"Go ahead and sit down. I don't bite."
He gave me a quick look. I couldn't read it, which both annoyed and intrigued me. So Brian Cameron was more of a challenge than I'd thought. I was up to that.
He sat, and I looked at him more closely. A blue shirt, darker blue pants, and white sneakers with signs of wear. Boring outfit, but the sneakers made me want to laugh. I never wore sneakers unless I was at the gym, and that he would was another sign of how he wasn't up to my level.
"If I'm interrupting, I can leave."
His concern for my welfare was touching, but unnecessary. "I'm in no hurry to get back to those," of course not, I'd finished with them, "and I'm delighted to have you here." Well, for a while. When he stopped amusing me, I'd throw him out.
I sat next to him, closer than anyone but a friend would sit, and waited to see what he'd do. If he moved away, I'd win.
He didn't move away, but he did swallow and look away for a moment. Well, he'd come here, so he deserved whatever he got.
"What do you want with me?"
My phrasing was deliberate. Brian had been a member of a gay and bisexual group in college, the Lambda Alliance, and had had some flings with men. The pictures of him with his arm around various men were telling. I'd enjoyed looking at them and reading the investigator's reports, although I knew that I couldn't tell Kate. She was shy enough about sex; bringing it up, especially something alternative, as she'd probably put it, would rebound against me. So Brian's secrets were safe with me. Why the hell he hadn't gone out and had some torrid affairs with women instead was beyond me. He was passably attractive.
Hm. To be honest, and I never was anything else with myself, he was more than passable. Having him next to me, a faint scent of some aftershave coming to me when I breathed in, and the warmth of his thigh against mine, was pleasant and even arousing. It was too bad that I'd decided that men were a waste of my time years ago.
He was staring at me as though he'd forgotten how to talk. "Are you here to tell me you're giving up Kate?" I was sure that he wasn't, but that ought to shake him out of his silence.
He swallowed, and the tip of his tongue came out to stroke his lips. I liked seeing him nervous. "I thought you might be lonely and would welcome some company."
I'd been right. He was here to see if he could become my friend. I'd play along.
"Nice of you. We can have a drink and talk, or play cards." If he chose cards, I'd make sure we played for money and take him for every cent he had.
He smiled. "A drink sounds good."
It sounded good to me too. "Coming right up." I didn't ask him what he wanted; he'd drink what I gave him.
I came back out with two glasses, one with a double shot of vodka over ice, the other with ice, but water. He'd get the vodka.
"Here's your drink." I handed him his glass and sat down, in the same place as before. Interesting that he hadn't moved.
"Thank you."
"You're welcome."
I wondered what he'd bring up as the first topic of discussion. Probably not Kate. If he had come here to talk about her, he'd wait until he thought that I was relaxed. He'd have a long wait. If I were him, I'd bring up movies. That would be safe enough.
He took a sip, then rested his glass on his knee. "This is awkward."
Well, points to him for stating the obvious. "Why? Because of Kate? Let the best man win."
He had an earnest look in his eyes, and I sighed. God, he wasn't going to say....
"Michael, we don't have to compete for Kate." He said it. "She'll make up her own mind, and pushing will only upset her."
So what? An upset Kate might fall into my bed, and if not, I didn't care. Brian was too tender-hearted for his own good.
"So you came to talk about Kate?" He nodded. "Please, Brian, I want a relaxing evening. Finish your drink and find something interesting to discuss."
He could tell me about his affairs with men. That would be interesting.
"We could talk about you."
I couldn't pass up the perfect chance to taunt him.
"Could we? Why, Brian, are you making a pass at me?"
Brian's eyes were fixed on me. "Yes."
What game was he trying to play with me? I would find out. If he thought that I could be embarrassed, he was mistaken, and if he thought that I could be swayed by sex, he was also mistaken. I'd take whatever game he was playing and turn it around on him. He'd regret it, when he could think again.
I let myself laugh. Maybe he wasn't playing a game. Maybe he was desperate enough to want sex, and I'd been wrong about his motivation for showing up tonight. Poor Brian.
"I didn't know you were still into guys. You didn't get enough in college?"
His eyes were full of longing. Desperation did have its appeal. "No. Did you get enough?"
He thought he knew something about me, but he didn't. He couldn't. He was taking a shot in the dark, hoping I'd done something with a man in my past and would be confused enough by his question and softened by his honesty to tell him.
"Ah, I get it now. You're hoping to get something on me. No, Brian, sorry, but I'm not interested in helping you."
"At least you're not denying it."
As if I needed to. "Why should I? There's nothing to deny. Did you talk to Kate about this delusion of yours?"
"No, I wouldn't do that. That's your business."
So much sincerity in his voice, but that desperation still in his eyes. Brian was playing a dangerous game. I hoped he knew that, but if he didn't, that was his problem.
"You're going to lose her, you know."
His hand as it fell on my thigh made me suck in a quick breath, and I hoped he hadn't noticed. Warm and not tentative at all. I'd thought he'd be tentative. It wasn't good that I'd been wrong.
"You think I'm going to lose her anyway. What do you care?"
"I don't." Of course I didn't care. He'd find someone else, or he wouldn't, but it was no concern of mine what happened to Brian Cameron.
One of his fingers was rubbing back and forth on my thigh, and I felt myself hardening. Damn him. This was not a game I wanted to play with him or any man. It was time to focus this conversation back on Brian.
"Go out to a bar and find yourself some man." He'd find someone with those desperate eyes and that body, even in those clothes.
He shook his head. "I'd rather have you."
So that desperation wasn't for any man, but for me. How could I use this?
"You, have me? You wouldn't know what to do with me."
I wanted to hear what he'd say to that, what he'd offer me. That hand and finger were not good for my control, and that desperation in his eyes was getting to me. I could fix it. I could give him more than he'd ever dreamed of getting.
Brian Cameron was either a fine player or a dangerous amateur, and I wasn't sure which I preferred. I couldn't tell him to leave. He'd know what that meant. Any fool would.
The desperation was in his voice when he answered. "I know what to do with a man. You've looked into me. You know that."
So he hadn't been bothered by my prying into his past. Interesting. I'd have been bothered, to put it mildly, to find out someone had investigated me well enough to know something so personal.
"I know you've had sex with men. I don't know anything more than that, but feel free to tell me more." He wanted to spill his secrets to me. All I had to do was encourage him.
"Give me another drink, and I'll consider talking."
He... damn him, he was getting to me, but I had gotten to him. He was hard, with a flush still on his face and his eyes pleading with me to touch him. Brian Cameron had very expressive eyes. I wondered if he knew that and used them accordingly, or if he were as ignorant about his assets as most people were.
"Ah, so that's the price? It's an easy one to meet." I'd get him drunk, he'd tell me everything about himself, and I'd dismiss him when I'd heard enough.
"Do you want me drunk? Is that how you like your men?"
His voice had too much promise in it, and my mind supplied pictures of him to go with that promise. It took me a moment to be sure that I could stand.
"You're a dangerous man, Brian Cameron."
I cursed myself as I went to the kitchen with the two glasses, mine empty and his vodka barely touched. That hadn't come out right at all. I'd meant it to be mocking, and it had sounded truthful.
I opened the refrigerator and scanned the contents until I found a bottle of Pol Roger Brut. I'd treat Brian with that. He might even appreciate the champagne. I knew that I would.
I could have him. It wouldn't take much. He wanted me, and he was here. But having him would give him more than I had been willing to give anyone for a long time. I could control myself. I'd been doing so since Raoul, the one man that I'd fucked.
I hated controlling myself. Why should I have to? This was my life. I could do what I wanted with it. I should do what I wanted with it, and Brian Cameron was tempting and available.
I eased out the cork and filled two flutes, waiting for the foam to subside before adding more. I'd let him in, convinced that he'd be easily played, and he'd turned out to be more skilled than I'd thought. That I didn't mind that showed me how careful I needed to be. Still, if I played this right, I'd be fine. Brian had come over for his own reasons, but he was playing my game now.
I picked up a flute in each hand and went back to the living room and Brian.
His eyes went right to me. I liked that, but that desperation was gone, replaced by calmness. That wasn't good. I needed to get him off balance again. He was more amusing off balance.
"Champagne?" He smiled, and I hated that I liked his smile. "I'm flattered."
I smiled back coolly and made sure to have the same coolness in my voice when I answered him. "Don't get ideas. I felt like drinking it." I wanted him to get ideas, though, even more than he already had.
He looked almost hurt for a moment as he took the flute from me and held it. Hurt was a good look on him. I wondered why he didn't drink any. Being polite? Probably. Politeness was often a waste of time in my opinion. Some people you gave it to because it kept them quiet, but others didn't deserve it. Brian clearly hadn't learned that.
I made sure to sit in the same place as before. I would not let him think he was getting to me. I wouldn't give him anything unless it suited me to give it to him.
He lifted the flute. "I'm glad to get the drink."
I drank after he did. "You're a trusting man, Brian. I could have put a drug in yours." I hadn't, but I wanted to see how he'd react to that.
His eyes had lost that calm and regained the desperation that I liked. Was it from being so close to me? That was good to know.
"You don't need to drug me to get me into your bed." His free hand was back on my thigh, but we weren't going to play that game any more. I pushed it off. It was high time I took control of this.
"I don't want you in my bed." A lie. Would he catch it?
"Then why are you hard?" His hand was back and warm and damned good on my crotch. I took it off again. Brian had to learn that I made the moves, not him.
"I want sex." I did, but I hadn't decided if he'd be the one to give it to me.
"I'm still here. You can do whatever you want with me."
And I might, but he'd have to wait for it, just like I would.
"So I could."
He was pale now, but he didn't say anything, just watched with those desperate eyes.
"You on your knees for me, on your hands and knees, and begging for it, because that's the only way you'll get anything from me."
That made his eyes widen. I had no doubt that Brian would never make anyone beg for anything.
"I think I might like that. Drink your champagne and we'll talk, unless you've changed your mind."
He hadn't, but it was the right thing to say.
He raised his flute in an almost-toast, showing more panache than he should have, but maybe it was bravado. "Here's to me on my knees for you."
Indeed. I smiled and drank. Perhaps he'd get lucky, and I'd let him get on his knees for me. More likely I'd send him home with no sex at all, but one never knew.
I took another sip while I decided on my next moves. Thank God my dick wasn't so insistent now. I moved close enough to him to touch his thigh with mine and put my arm around him. I thought for a moment that he was going to put his head on my shoulder, but he didn't. He did take a quick breath, and that and his warmth were almost enough to get me to discard my slow approach and kiss him. But I could do that later.
"Tell me how you like it, Brian." I let my fingers move over his shoulder, and he shifted closer to me. Brian liked this. This was going to be easy. He wasn't dangerous to me after all. "No, tell me what you've done. The information I got was scanty at best."
His eyes had as much lust as desperation, and I liked seeing both. "It was probably accurate. Hand jobs, blow jobs, and a few fucks."
The shape of his lips saying 'fucks' as well as the sound of the word in his quiet voice made me want to fuck him right there, and it took a moment to get myself under control.
"So you have been fucked? Of course you have, with an ass like yours."
I was fairly sure that he hadn't been fucked, but his flush at my casual statement was priceless.
"I did the fucking when there was any."
So I'd been right. It didn't matter. Brian Cameron would spread his legs and beg for my dick, and I'd give it to him.
When had I made up my mind about Brian? After a breath and another look at his longing face, I didn't care. I wanted him, and I was going to have him.
"You? Well, well, wonders will never cease." I gave him a smile and saw him flick his tongue over his lips. I'd have to see what that tongue could do.
"Do you like the thought of being the first with me?"
I set my flute down on the end table and ran my finger down his cheek, then his neck, switching to my nail to get him to moan, as I thought about how to answer his question, or if to answer at all.
"Yes." If he gave the question any thought, he'd know that. "Put down your glass."
When, after some fumbling around, he'd done so, I slipped a finger into his shirt and worked on the buttons with my free hand. He closed his eyes and started trembling. Very responsive. I found a nipple and ran my nail over it, and he whimpered, his face flushing even more. I thought again about kissing him, but instead I ran my nail over his nipple again, then moved my head to his ear and took the lobe in my mouth and nipped it, with a squeeze to his nipple to give him two things to think about, although I was sure that he wasn't thinking.
He whimpered, and I smiled. No, not thinking at all.
Then he had his lips on mine, and the warmth and desperateness and yes, the skill of his lips and tongue had me kissing him back.
I pulled away as soon as I realized that. I was not going to let him take over or let this degenerate into some kind of mutual groping session. I was going to run this.
"No."
He whimpered again and leaned toward me, his tongue slipping out and tracing my lips, making them tingle. Damn, what the hell did he have to get to me so well? Was it that he was a man and it had been too long since I'd had one? Or was it something more? No, it couldn't be that. It had just been too long since I'd had anyone. I'd be fine.
"Please, Michael."
His begging made me push away my worries. I still had it. How could I have doubted myself?
"I want you so much." His tongue slid over my lips again, and my dick put in a request to have that tongue pay some attention to it.
Brian Cameron was my creature, and he'd only be more mine by the time I'd fucked him and made him come with my name on his lips, just like Raoul had when I'd fucked him.
Damn. I didn't need to think about Raoul or how my bastard father had sent him away when he walked in on us.
I reached for Brian instead and took his mouth and stopped him from even whimpering. He clung to me, and his hands were as good as his mouth. It took a real effort to stop kissing him.
He started whimpering again as soon as my lips left his, and he raised his hands to my shoulders, but before he could get hold of me, I shook my head, and he stopped. Good Brian. He was learning the rules.
"You said I could do whatever I wanted with you." I wanted him to think about that, and from the flush on his face, he was.
"As long as you do something."
So much pleading in his voice even when he was trying to tell me what to do. I wanted to strip him and fuck him right there, but I also wanted to wait and get more pleasure from him first.
I started on his shirt, working it out of his pants. I would have him stripped. I wanted to see his body, and it would make him know his place even better when he was naked while I stayed dressed. I wanted him to know his place.
"You can count on that."
I was going to do everything to him that I'd done to Raoul, and there were things that I hadn't gotten from Raoul that Brian was going to do for me. Raoul had never sucked my dick for more than a few moments, and Raoul had never screamed for me. Brian would do both of those and more.
His face was even more flushed now. Time to let him know what I expected from him.
"Are you good at sucking cock, Brian?"
He nodded with a confidence that made me laugh to myself. Really? I'd be the judge of that. I pushed his shirt out of my way and worked on his nipples, stroking, rubbing, and squeezing them as he whimpered and squirmed. Very nice.
"Show me."
I squeezed his nipples once more time, hard, then took my hands away. He looked at me with that desperation I liked so much, then went on his knees between my legs. I liked seeing him there, but I'd forgotten to get his pants off. Well, I could wait, and if his mouth was as good at sucking cock as it had been at kissing, my wait would be enjoyable.
"Do you want me to make you come?"
His eyes were big, with a touch of fear in them. So Brian wasn't as experienced as he claimed. He was lucky that I hadn't planned to come yet.
I smiled and moved to the edge of the couch as I answered him. "You will, Brian. But not yet, and not with your mouth." I'd come in his ass first, then we'd see.
The fear was gone from his eyes now, and I watched as he opened my pants and wrapped his fingers around my dick. I had to stop myself from thrusting. Too damned long. I had to remember not to do that again. I didn't like being this hungry for sex.
When he didn't do anything more, I put my hand on his head, but resisted the urge to pull at his brown hair. "Brian."
I wasn't going to wait around all night for him to get his courage up. He'd offered me anything, and he was damned well going to provide it.
He must have gotten the message, because he got the head of my dick into his mouth and started licking it. It took him longer than I liked to get more in, but when he did, I was amazed at the improvement. He was good at sucking cock, so good that after a few moments I had to get my hand down and squeeze to stop myself from coming.
"Brian. Stop."
He didn't stop sucking, and I found myself thrusting into his mouth. Dammit, he was not going to get me to come yet.
"Brian!"
I pulled my dick out of his mouth and glared at him. He was panting, and his eyes were pleading with me to do something more. He'd gotten into sucking me off, and I couldn't blame him for that. He hadn't meant to try to push me over the edge. I let go of my dick, since I was past needing to come, and softened my voice.
"I'm going to fuck you now. Take off your pants."
He let out a moan and grabbed the couch to help him stand. "Yes, Michael."
He took a step backwards and reached for his belt, and I smiled as his fingers fumbled with the clasp.
"Don't take too long, or you might have to convince me to fuck you all over again."
He gave me an almost stricken look at that, and I laughed to myself. I was doing a fine job keeping him off-balance.
"I'm hurrying."
He lowered his eyes, and I smiled. Yes, he most certainly was, and the more he hurried, the more I enjoyed it.
He managed to get out of his pants and his boxers, kicking off his shoes just as I was wondering if he'd forgotten about them, and stripped off his socks. Then he straightened and stood naked in front of me, and I stared. Brian Cameron had a fine body. Why didn't he show it off? Too modest, I decided. If he were mine, I'd keep him in tight clothes and when he was with me, not too many of them. And since he was mine tonight, he was going to stay naked so that I could see and enjoy his body.
I licked my lips at the thought of him moaning as I fucked his ass, then begging me to fuck him harder and faster, to give him what he needed. How had I gone this long without hearing a man's voice begging me for sex? I didn't want to go without it again, and I wouldn't. Kate would think nothing of me 'going for a drink with the guys,' or whatever excuse I chose to use, as long as I was discreet.
I didn't want to think about her now. I wanted Brian, who was right there, with his dick hard and up against his stomach, and his eyes still full of that lovely desperation. He'd do anything to get off, and I'd be more than happy to give him things to do.
"Michael. Please - " he shut his eyes and shivered, " - fuck me."
I waited until his eyes opened to answer.
"Problem saying it? You'll have to get over that." I stood. "Come on."
I reached out and gave him one teasing stroke to his dick, getting a moan from him.
"If you can't do as you're told, you can leave." I knew that would get him focused again.
"I'll do as I'm told." His voice was almost too low to hear. "I - " He shivered again, then took a deep breath. "I want you so much."
My dick got even harder, and I thought seriously about putting him over the couch and fucking him, but it was his first time, and it would be easier for us both on the bed. I nodded toward the hall, and he nodded back and followed me.
"Why hasn't anyone fucked you before, Brian?"
He was behind me, so I couldn't see his face, but I knew the question and the amused note in my voice had to embarrass him.
"I didn't find anyone good enough for me."
I smiled to myself. He'd gotten his balance again. I'd take care of that.
"I'm flattered."
I opened the door to my bedroom and motioned him inside, then shut the door behind us.
"Face down on the bed, arms over your head, and spread your legs."
My voice dropped on the last order, and his eyes widened, but he got himself on the bed as I'd ordered. I liked what I saw, but he wasn't quite how I wanted him yet.
"Spread your legs wider."
I wasn't going to fuck him like this, but he didn't need to know that. His pose was for my viewing pleasure. He'd get his pleasure in good time.
"Yes, Michael."
His legs moved farther apart, and I nodded. That would do.
"Now stay there. Don't move."
I took off my clothes and watched him struggle to keep from grinding his dick against the comforter. He'd get pre come on it, but it was a small price to pay for the picture of his ass muscles clenching, then relaxing. His lean body stood out against the dark green satin, and I liked how well he worked as a decoration in my bedroom. I'd have to see about getting him spread-eagled and bound, but that would wait. This time I wanted him bound by my will and his desperation.
When I decided that he'd waited long enough, I leaned over and nipped at his neck. He gasped and jerked away from me.
"Don't move, I said." My voice was harsh, and he whimpered.
"I'm sorry."
He stilled, and I nipped him again. This time he stayed put, so I worked down his back and right side to his ass. By that time I was kissing and licking as often as I was nipping, and the sounds he was making were whimpers and moans. I liked hearing those.
He had a good ass, firm and smooth, and I wondered again why one of his partners hadn't tried harder to fuck him. Was Brian that good? It didn't matter. That part of his experience was of no interest to me.
I moved between his legs and started licking his inner thighs as my dick reminded me again that it wasn't getting a hell of a lot. I didn't like that, but I'd made a point of saying that Brian was going to have to beg before I'd fuck him, and I was going to keep to it. If he didn't beg soon, though, I was going to have to do something about that. I needed him to beg.
I nipped at some skin very close to his balls, and he moaned louder than I'd heard him yet. I smiled and nipped another spot just as close.
"Please!"
About time he said something.
"Please what?" I licked both places that I'd nipped.
"Please fuck me."
Good Brian. I lifted my head and rested it on his leg, taking another nip of his ass.
"Who do you want to fuck you?"
"Michael. You. I want you to fuck me." He shuddered. "I need it."
He was even more desperate than he'd been in my living room. I liked him desperate. I got off the bed.
"You need it?"
"Yes. Please, Michael."
I'd planned to fuck him on his hands and knees, but I wanted to see his face.
"Turn over."
When he was on his back, I grabbed a pillow and shoved it under his ass.
"Hands over your head."
He did what I ordered, grabbing the bottom of the headboard, then spread his legs wide. Oh, yes, he needed it.
And I needed - wanted - to give it to him.
I needed something to make it easier for both of us: lubricant. Damn. Did I have any? I'd had one woman who loved being fucked in the ass, but that was over two years ago. There ought to be some left, and if not, I'd find something. I wasn't going to let Brian come before I'd shown him how I fucked.
I couldn't stop staring at Brian. Dammit, if I was going to fuck him, I had to move. I turned my head away and opened the drawer of my bedstand. Yes, there was a half-used tube of lubricant. We'd be just fine.
"Please, Michael. Now."
I smiled at the desperation in his voice. "In a minute."
He spread his legs even further apart and pushed his hips up toward me, his eyes begging for more. For me. I unscrewed the top from the tube, squeezed some on my fingers, then spread it over and into his hole. He moaned and writhed at my touch. I wanted to be buried in him, to find out how tight he was, to get what I needed from him and give him what he needed from me.
It took more control and time than I liked to roll on a condom and slick it up, but I did it and got my dick against Brian's ass.
"Do you still want me, Brian?"
"Yes. Please, Michael."
I rubbed my dick against his hole. "That's not good enough, Brian. Say it."
He whimpered, and I kept rubbing, then he shuddered and opened his mouth. "I want you to," he gasped, "fuck me."
I pushed into him as he was speaking, and he arched up, making it easier. What a good boy he was. He wasn't as tight as I'd feared he'd be; his muscles gripped my dick, but not to the point that I felt I'd hurt him if I moved; and he looked and sounded as though he enjoyed it. Of course he did. I was fucking him.
I thrust in and out, and he gasped and shuddered and moaned. Fucking a guy on a bed was much better than the way I'd done it before. The closest Raoul and I had come was a pile of hay with a blanket over it in an empty stall.
Raoul. I wondered if he remembered me as vividly as I remembered him.
I fixed my eyes on Brian's throat and kept fucking him. Soon after he came with one of my harder thrusts. He moaned something that might have been my name, and I was content with that. Only then did I speed up and let myself come. Then I pulled out and went to the bathroom to clean off. When I came back, his eyes were open.
"Michael."
I smiled and touched his cheek. "So you like a dick in your ass."
I thought that he'd blush, but he smiled and turned his head to kiss my fingers. "Yes. Thank you."
"My pleasure." I handed him a bunch of tissues, and this time he did blush as he wiped himself off. "Feel free to use the bathroom."
"Thank you."
He got off the bed and headed out, and I sat down. I should make him go home, but then I wouldn't get to do anything more with him, and it would be amusing to see how he reacted once he realized what he'd done and with whom he'd done it. Yes, Brian had to stay. We had the champagne to finish.
By the time he got back, I was dressed. "Want some more champagne?"
I smiled at him and decided that I'd act as though nothing out of the ordinary had happened. I could always taunt him for his weakness later, after I'd gotten him on his knees begging for more. I wanted that very much. And if he was lucky, I'd let him have what he'd begged for.
"Yes, thank you."
"I'll be in the living room. Want me to bring in your clothes?"
He wouldn't expect me to offer that, I was sure. Maybe he'd make the mistake of thinking that we were friends now.
He smiled and shook his head, and I shrugged. His choice.
He followed me into the living room and reached for his pants as calmly as if he were alone, and I decided to be kind and not watch him dress. I picked up the two flutes and headed toward the kitchen.
"Could I finish mine first? The champagne's delicious."
I turned to look at him but didn't stop. "It's flat, Brian. It'll taste like shit now."
"Oh." He sounded crestfallen, and I smiled to myself. No, Brian wouldn't know something that elemental about wine. "May I have another glass? Please?"
The sound of him asking, almost begging me for more of anything, even champagne, made me wish that I had the recovery time I'd had when I was a teenager, but I'd have to wait a little longer to get it up again. But when I did, Brian Cameron was going to beg me for more than champagne.
"Of course." I made sure to sound surprised that he'd doubt that and wished that I could see the happy smile I was sure he had.
"Thanks!"
Ah, Brian was so easy to predict. Really no challenge at all. But he'd relieved the boredom of my evening amazingly well. I'd have to make sure he came again for that.
I dumped the flat champagne down the sink, rinsed out the flutes, and refilled them. What would I do with Brian until I was up to fucking him again? There was always talking, although I didn't really have anything to say to him, or I could sit and watch him and let him do whatever talking seemed necessary. He might be my guest, but that didn't mean that I had to entertain him every minute. I hadn't asked him here.
He was sitting on the couch when I walked in, his clothes on, although not his shoes or socks, and his shirt only partly buttoned. So he was thinking about having sex again. That was good to know.
I handed him his flute and got a big smile in return.
"Thank you." He took a sip. "I've never tasted anything so good."
Of course he hadn't. I smiled back and sat down next to him. "There's more in the bottle, and we might as well finish it."
"I'd like that."
What didn't he like? I was beginning to think I wouldn't find anything, and the idea appealed to me.
"Good. Now finish yours so we can have more."
"Whatever you say, Michael."
He lifted his flute and drank more, and I sipped from mine and thought about what I'd do with him after we'd finished the champagne. I had more than enough ideas to choose from.
*****
"Come back to bed with me."
He had after all said that I could do whatever I wanted with him, so I saw no need to be anything but direct.
I curled my hand around the back of his neck. "I think we've been social long enough."
Not that we'd done much more than sit there together, but he wasn't showing any signs of embarrassment or shame for his actions, and I was ready for more.
He smiled. "More than long enough. But thank you for the champagne."
I hadn't opened the bottle for him, but I didn't need to tell him that. "You're welcome. Now get out of those clothes."
"Let me kiss you first."
I liked the pleading in his voice, so I nodded. His lips were on mine before I could move, and I let him get the tip of his tongue into my mouth for a moment before taking over the kiss. His arms came around me and held on tightly, and I tightened my grip on his neck. I didn't need to hold back with him. He'd shown that he could take what I wanted to give him.
I broke the kiss. "Now strip."
"In the bedroom, please."
"All right." I'd give him that much.
I let go of his neck, and he took his arms away and stood. When he turned toward the door, I lowered my hand to my crotch and pressed it against the cloth covering my hard dick. Soon I'd be buried in Brian's ass again, or maybe I'd have him suck me off. I liked how he looked with his mouth stretched around my dick.
I lifted my hand and stood. I didn't want to miss Brian stripping for me.
*****
He had his shirt off when I walked in, but that was all. I pulled down the bedspread and the blanket and sheet, then sat on the bed and watched him take off his pants. His dick sprang out and up against his stomach, and I smiled. He wanted me badly. Well, he was going to get me.
I wanted to use the cuffs on him, but I couldn't wait to fuck him once he was naked. I stripped out of my clothes while he watched with big eyes.
"Like what you see?"
"Yes, Michael."
His admiration made me want him even more. "Good. I'm going to fuck you again."
"I want you to."
"I know."
I went over to my dresser and took out a leather cockring. The same woman who'd liked being fucked in the ass had brought it over one night and talked me into wearing it once, but I hadn't found it an experience worth repeating. However, I liked the thought of Brian wearing it. I motioned him closer.
"You're going to wear this for me."
He moaned as I snapped it on him.
"Looks good." I stroked his shaft, then let go. "On the bed, hands and knees."
He didn't move.
"Now."
My voice was hard, and he started, then scrambled up.
"Keep your hands off your dick. You'll come when I want you to come." He hadn't made a move for his dick, and even if he did, he shouldn't be able to come with the constraint around the base, but I didn't want him to forget who was in charge, and I liked him doing what I said.
He moaned again, and I rested my hand on his back.
"Relax, Brian." I deliberately softened my voice. I wanted to fuck him, not waste time gentling him again with kisses and touches. "You'll like this."
He shuddered, then breathed out. "I know," he whispered.
I took my hand off and got myself ready, then smeared lube on and into him. He whimpered when I pushed in a finger, and I smiled. He was taking to this as I'd known he would.
I didn't bother with more preliminaries; he'd begged, and I was ready to give him what he'd begged for. I pushed into him in a smooth motion, and he cried out in what sounded like pain, but moved back into me. Yes, he was ready for it too.
After the start, I took it slower, stroked his back, whispered to him how hot he looked, slipped my hand around to his nipples and played with them, which made him squirm in a way that got me hotter, and fucked him. Finally he begged me to make him come, his voice broken and desperate, and I sped up my strokes, undid the cockring, and worked his dick until he cried out again and came. I kept thrusting into him until I came as well.
I pulled out of him.
"Michael."
His voice was full of exhaustion and satiation, and I smiled. Brian knew what he needed now, and it was to be fucked. I liked that thought.
"Shhh." I pushed him down into the bed. "Go to sleep."
I'd let him stay. The morning would be soon enough to dismiss him.
But as I stripped off the condom, wiped myself off, and got into bed, something nagged at me. Had I forgotten something? I didn't like that feeling, but I was too tired to follow it and find the source.
I fell asleep still wondering.
*****
Posted 11/11/03
Part 3 of Michael's pov, The Way to Shut Him Up
