Twilight Descisions

Michelle

Part 2

Spike glared at his sire. "Are you laughing at me Angelus? Mr. 'She's-my-friend-so-I'm-going-to-spy-on-her'? You're laughing at me?"

"Hold it. You're the one who spies on her because she-what?-saved your life? What's so much better about that? Last time I checked, people didn't really acknowledge being stalked as appropriate thanks," Angel retorted, growing angry.

"I wouldn't know about that," Spike answered in a low, dangerous voice, rising to his feet. "You're the expert on stalking around here. So, do you still follow women around? Is that how you and Buffy met?" When he saw the look on Angel's face, he laughed. "It is, isn't it? And you call me a stalker! At least I have a reason to be watching out for Willow! What was your reason with Buffy?"

"Oh? What's this all-important reason of yours? And don't tell me that she saved your life and you owe her. I know you, remember? You don't pay a debt to anyone, least of all the Slayer's best friend. So, what was that reason again?" Angel shot back, also rising and walking toward Spike.

"What was yours?" Spike yelled, anger building in him. He knew what was going to happen. Willow would choose Angel over him. Just like Dru. He would lose her to him and there was nothing he could do about it. Angel was right, Spike knew. Willow would know that he didn't deserve her. "Why were you sitting out on her front lawn spying on her? She's your friend! She'd let you in whenever you wanted! Instead, you watch her from the bushes! Why? Oh, maybe you feel guilty since you already have a girlfriend!"

"And you don't?" Angel's voice rose in volume to match Spike's. He was also feeling insecure after seeing the easy banter Spike and Willow had shared earlier. "What about Dru? She's not your girlfriend?"

"No, actually, she's not," Spike roared. "Thanks to you!" he added. "As if she weren't bad enough before, getting you back and then losing you again pretty much turned her into a raving lunatic! She walked around most of the night looking for YOU and when she couldn't find you she decided to try killing Willow. Congratulations. You got everything you always wanted. She had a complete psychotic break! I hope you're happy," he finished, his nose inches from Angel's face.

Their faces had both morphed into their vampiric visages long ago and Willow stood staring at the two vampires with fear in her eyes. She knew that neither of them would hurt her, but she was fairly sure that they hated each other enough to cause physical harm. She knew she had to diffuse the situation quickly, but she wasn't exactly certain how to do so. Carefully stepping towards them, she tried calming them. "Um, guys?" she said, still inching towards them. "Do you think you could just step away from each other for me, please?" She gulped when the two turned to look at her, but didn't back down. "Just step back."

As they followed her order, the tension in the room subsided. They both kept their "game faces" for a few minutes and then those too faded away. Willow continued staring at them until they both stood with their own normal faces. She let out a sigh of relief when they were finally back to normal. The two vampires continued to regard each other cagily, each waiting for the other to make a move. Finally, when they had calmed enough for her taste, Willow placed herself between them.

"Okay, you two," she said, turning her head from one to the other. "What the hell was that about?" She was pleased to see that they both had the decency to at least look sheepish. Neither one of them answered, though, and she stared them down. Finally deciding that neither of them was going to venture anything, she prodded them again. "Well? You guys just started fighting out of nowhere. What's going on?" She was confused. They were fighting over something, but she wasn't sure what it was.

Angel looked around the room uncomfortably. << Oh hell, >> he thought blindly. << How do I answer that? Oh, we're fighting over you because we're both in love with you? And then Spike rips my spinal cord out and serves it on a platter. That would be just perfect. I'm sure he would just love for me to tell her that.>>

"It's just something that goes way back," Spike explained smoothly, only partially lying. "We don't like each other and sometimes we let that get the best of us. Sorry, luv. I don't know what got into me."

"And you?" Willow asked pointedly, shooting a look at Angel.

"Yeah, same thing," Angel said quickly.

"Uh-huh, sure. You're both lying through your pointy little teeth. That was about a lot more than just not liking each other," she returned. "Oh well, never mind. Look, we're going to have to talk about this eventually. So, let's just do it. Why don't the two of you sit down?" she asked them. "On separate sides of the room," she added when they both moved to sit on the couch. "Okay," she said when they sat down. "Would you like to explain why the two of you have been hanging out on my lawn lately?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Um, no?" Angel questioned carefully.

"Wrong answer," Willow informed him. "Why have you been hanging out on my lawn? Even Buffy's starting to notice that you've been lurking around her a lot less than usual. I know you've both been out there. I just don't know why."

"Do we have to talk about this right now?" Angel responded.

"Yeah, actually we do. I can only keep Buffy from seeing you both out there for so long. How am I supposed to explain it to her if she finds out when I don't even know why you're there?" Willow asked. "Don't get me wrong, I appreciate it. I've felt safer here in the past week than I have in years, but I would still like to know why."

Spike, who had been silent for several minutes, finally spoke up. "I've been here to make sure Dru didn't hurt you."

Willow regarded him for a moment and then decided to go ahead with her challenge. "And tonight?" she asked, giving him a look. When he looked at her curiously she continued, "Drusilla is dead. She can't hurt me. What were you doing out there tonight?"

"I wasn't out there. I just came over to tell you about Dru," Spike lied.

"I know you were out there. You were both out by that bush over there," Willow, who had moved to the window, pointed in the direction of said bush. I could feel you when I came home. You're lucky Buffy didn't figure out you were both here. She probably would've staked you," she said, turning to Spike. "So why? I just don't understand. I mean, I understood when Angel was following Buffy around. Who wouldn't? She's pretty and strong and funny, but I'm just me. Plain, boring me. Why are you staking out my house?" she concluded, her frustration and confusion showing through.

Spike stared at her for a moment in desbelief. Finally realizing that she meant what she was saying, he said, What in the world are you talking about? Exactly which Buffy are you referring to, pet?"

Willow raised her eyes to stare into his. She regarded him for a long moment and then answered, "Buffy Summers...vampire slayer? Remember her?"

"The Slayer? You think the Slayer is prettier and stronger and funnier than you?" Spike asked incredulously. "Are you serious?" Seeing the look on Willow's face he sobered. "Oh, I guess so. Well, pet, you're completely off base with that one. Maybe Angelus likes ditzy blondes but I don't. Even Drusilla was intelligent. She just had a few sanity problems."

"Buffy's not ditzy," Willow said in defense of her friend. "She just has more important things to worry about than school and stuff."

Spike laughed. "That's not what I'm talking about. I couldn't care less about school. I'm talking about the way she acts in normal life. She's not exactly the brightest person in the world. Besides, you have everything over her. You're much smarter, funnier, kinder, and, yes, prettier. You're gorgeous," he said before she could object.

"Spike's right," Angel agreed. "Why do you always compare yourself to Buffy, anyway? Somehow, you've gotten the idea that Buffy's more worthy than you are. I don't understand that. You're the best friend I've ever had. You saved my soul when everyone else had given up. And then you risked your life--your life!--to pull me back out of hell. You could have died! You know that don't you?" he asked, hoping to convince her. When she nodded sadly he continued, "Good. But you didn't let that scare you away. You brought me back and I can never repay you for that. There's nothing I can do that could possibly compare to that kind of gift. So, don't ever sell yourself short."

"But..." Willow protested. "Buffy's..."

"Buffy's what?" Angel prompted.

"The guys always like her so much more," she admitted finally in a wail.

"Which guys are those?" Angel asked. "Xander?" When Willow nodded, he laughed. "Last time I checked Xander informed you tonight that he loves you."

"But he used to like her," Willow responded. "And all the other guys..."

"Like Oz? Spike? Me, for that matter?" Angel asked quietly. "Yes, I do love her. But am I with her right now? No. I'm here with you. So, as far as I can see, most of the guys you know love you, not Buffy."

"You don't love me," Willow answered, something close to pain in her voice. "And Spike doesn't love me. Spike loves Drusilla."

"Yeah," Angel replied, grinning. "I always kill the people I love most, don't you?"

"Well," she said defensively, reluctant to allow Angel to insult Spike. "Maybe he had a good reason."

"I did have a good reason, pet," Spike agreed. "She was going to hurt you. I could never let that happen," he said softly. "Okay, there is no easy way to admit this, so I'm just going to say it. Then I'm going to leave. You can break things and scream and everything after I'm gone, okay? Angelus will be here to take care of you. I love you. I'm sorry. I don't expect you to love me back. I know that's not possible. No, don't say anything," he said quickly when he saw Willow open her mouth to speak. "I just wanted you to know. I'll leave now," he concluded and walked out of the living room toward the front door.

Hearing the door slam shut, Willow started, a tear slipping out of her eye and down her cheek. "But, but," she objected. "Why did he leave?" she asked miserably, turning to Angel.

Angel's heart broke when he saw the look on her face. In that instant he knew he had lost her before he even had a chance. But he knew that, as her friend, he had to help her. He engulfed her in his arms and she began sobbing against his shoulder. He stroked her hair softly, mentally letting her go. When she finally finished crying, she pulled away and looked up into his face.

"Sorry about that," she said softly.

Angel smiled gently at her. "That's all right. Do you love him?" he asked simply.

Willow thought for a moment before answering. "Yeah, I think so."

"Do you want me to go get him?" Angel asked, silently telling his protesting heart to be quiet.

"No," Willow said thoughtfully. "I'll do it. I'm sorry," she continued, sensing for the first time that she was hurting him. "I did think I loved you, but I think I was confusing friendship with romantic love. They're not the same thing. Besides," she smiled awkwardly. "You and Buffy can be happy together, right?"

Angel gathered his courage around him. "Yeah," he said, returning her smile. "We'll be happy together. Now, go catch Spike before he gets too far away. You never know. He might leave town."

"Okay," Willow agreed, brushing the last tears from her face. "Where do you think he'd go first?" she asked hopefully.

"Well, I'd try out the door if I were you," Angel chuckled. "Be careful, though," he said, following her to the door.

"I will," Willow agreed and opened the door. What she saw outside it made her laugh with happiness. "Good call, Angel," she said over her shoulder.

She stepped out onto the porch and smiled at Spike who was sitting on the top step. He had turned around when she opened the door and she could see the grin that spread across his face. "Hey," she said softly, sitting down next to him.

"Hello," he answered, softly touching her cheek where the tear stains clearly showed. "You've been crying," he stated.

"Yeah," Willow nodded, revelling in the way his hand felt against her cheek.

"Why have you been crying?" Spike asked.

"You left," Willow said simply, as if that explained everything. When he just stared at her she continued, "You wouldn't let me talk and then you just left. I was trying to tell you that I love you too, you big idiot," she said, swatting his arm.

Spike's arm dropped to his side and he stared at her for a moment in shock. "What did you just say?" he asked, disbelief evident in his voice.

"I said I love you," Willow smiled.

A slow smile spread across Spike's face. "That's what I thought. Are you sure?" he asked, questioning her judgment.

"Well, I think so," Willow admitted. "Maybe not completely. But I'm pretty sure I'd like to find out," she added mischievously.

"Really?" Spike asked, wanting to be sure. "Does it bother you that I kill people? Because that's not something I'm going to just stop," he told her seriously. "Your friends aren't likely to approve of me, you know. Are you really sure about this?"

Willow pondered what he said for a moment, staring off into space. Then she smiled slyly and lunged at Spike, latching her lips to his. She kissed him passionately until she herself ran out of breath. Then she pulled away, sucking in air. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure," she told him. "God, I wish I could do that!" she exclaimed after she got her breath back, awed by Spike's ability to go without breathing.

"No you don't luv," he chuckled. "The stuff that goes along with it wouldn't be too appealing to you." He tucked a stray strand of hair behind Willow's ear and smiled at her. "Well, if you're really sure," he started and then kissed her softly on the forehead. Then he rose, lifting her to her feet. "Let's go then," he urged, dragging her behind him.

"Wait. Spike!" Willow protested, laughing. "Where are we going?"

"Everywhere, luv," Spike laughed. "Everywhere."

THE END



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