God Is Good!
Storms of Life
Today I sit in humble gratitude to God for his awesome provision once more. My son has again been in the hospital, as have several other members of my family. I personally have had a virus that has given me dizziness, or so the doctor called it. I went for three weeks off and on hanging on to walls to go around my home. Of course, this meant I was unable to work so there was no income. I am still having a tiny bit of this, but only at night. The pills were worse then the problem so it is a good thing it was viral and would go away in time on its own.
As soon as he got out I had a sale to bring in some cashflow, but I made very little. I did get an opportunity to talk to someone who desperately needs the Lord while working, so that may have been the biggest reason the Lord wanted me there. So I am very grateful he was able to use me in that way. Customers need someone they can pour their hearts out to like that sometimes and as a Christian you can pray for them and talk to them about their real needs.
We must remind ourselves that the Lord's agenda is not usually the same as ours, so he may have a reason to have us somewhere, that we are unaware of his purpose for that situation. We must just trust him and do all we know to do in whatever situation we find ourselves. When we have done all, stand.
That evening I was fighting the words being whispered in my ear and coming from inside to make me worry. I had a months worth of bills plus I had used some that was allotted for the house payment for trips to and from the hospital. It was due within the week. My grandchildren were coming over and there was little food for them. So I did what I always do, I prayed. Then I went on-line and contacted a ministry and filled out a prayer request just as a prayer of agreement for our provision and finances.
When things are not going well, they just seem to snowball. The devil keeps hitting you to bring you to your knees.
As I clicked the send button on the site, it would not send. I tried several times but without luck and finally I said forgot it and went to bed. I told myself God heard the prayer as I typed so it was all up to him.
The next day I felt a little better and after spending time with God I went out to mow. I had already gone on-line and put in my prayer request with another ministry. The family was gone to my grandson's soccer game so I worked all morning off and on with the mower doing the first mowing of the season.
Hours later my son came in all excited and said the roads were full of people we ought to have a yard sale. I was beat and hot and sweaty. My neighbor had told me another neighbor had been stopped from having yard sales because she had so many and this was already my second one of the season. As I finished the area that was most noticeable, the boys set up the things I already had and flew out to put up the signs. I went in to clean up and then went out to take over for them. It was already 2:00 in the afternoon, extremely late for a sale.
If this was God's way of meeting our needs I wasn't going to miss it though.
Yes, my neighbor came over to remind me, and I hope I wasn't too short with her when I said "You know my son has just gotten out of the hospital."
In three or four hours I made more then I had doing my other work the previous day, and did one more day and had enough to meet my house payment and some of the other bills.
I thank God for his provision and for the ministries that I reach out to when I want someone to pray for me. Not all local churches have a prayer chain and that is a real shame. Everyday people need prayer. That was why I started this website. I know that when I have a need I want to know others are praying for me also. God will continue to meet my needs as I pray and others pray for me. He is my husband. He knows if he can get his message through my thick head I will do what he wants with his help.
I would like to tell you everything is much better, but I tried to finish the mowing and burned up a brand new mower. There must have been a problem with it already or that wouldn't have happened.
One little thing after another has continued to happen and I firmly believe it is because someone doesn't want me trusting the Lord for my provision. I ask you "who should I trust?" I would be very foolish to give up on God now when he has been so good to me so often.
Here is another example of how thick headed I can be. I hope it shows you that He continues to work with us even when he has trouble getting his message into our hearts. He won't give up on you any more then he has ever given up on me. So don't you give up!
Here is an example of his faithfulness in the midst of our failures.
One very good example of this is in the area of smoking. I was raised in a time when most people thought nothing of smoking. I was working in a factory and running with a crowd of people that all smoked. So at the age of 23, when you would think I would have been old enough to know better, I started smoking. I quit once a year in the fall because I had hay fever and the doctor always said something about smoking. Each time I did I gained twenty pounds. So I would go back. Finally I reached a point where I could not stop on my own. I tried many times with no luck.
One evening in my home after church I received the infilling of the Holy Spirit. It was a glorious experience. I was feeling so wonderful and so close to God I wanted to go on reading the word, so I picked up my bible and began reading. At the same time I began to light a cigarette. I heard a voice say "Un, un, uh." It was the kindest, gentlest voice I had ever heard. So I put the cigarette out and gave an entire carton of cigarettes away.
I went a long time without smoking, but later I fell away from God enough and I was getting so heavy that I went back to it. I had not learned the importance of daily filling myself with the word to keep my spirit strong. It was a very wishy washy time in my life.
A few years later while in evening services at my church we were having a discussion on submission. I joined in and hope I added to the conversation.
I had smoked for so long by this time that I was unable to quit. I had tried several times.
When I got home that evening I sat down to read my bible and a still small voice said "Submission, huh?" as I started to light a cigarette.
I put that one out and I have not smoked since. It has been years. I could always tell you before how long it had been since my last one, I cannot this time, but I know it has been many years. The Lord did it. I had been unable to do it myself and had I done it I know I would have remembered how long it had been.
Yes, I gained weight, but I refuse to pick up a cigarette to get rid of it. I laughingly tell myself I have just given the Holy Spirit a larger temple to live in. I do try to diet, of course, but this is how I keep from letting it upset me too much. I joke about it.
Another incident that shows how good God can be to us when we so desperately need him happened when I was living in another town working for a company where I made good money. I had hoped to keep this job forever. The pay was wonderful.
This was just before my son went on dialysis and after he got his ostomy. My whole world fell apart. I came under such tribulation that it extended from work to home and even to my church life. Even places I shopped were involved. I was so shook I thought I was going insane. I even went to counseling in hopes of finding help. No one was there for me.
My son ran off, out of state, with his daughters mother. That is where she was conceived. He had been working and had purchased a car on time. He emptied his bank account and even overdrew it. He owed them, he owed car payments that weren't being met. The girl I then learned was not even sixteen when she had told him she was. That was just the beginning of that area.
Then I came under some kind of suspicion at work and I kept trying to tell myself it was my imagination, until I finally got my supervisor and my union stewardess together for a meeting to find out why I was being watched all the time. My boss was a Christian and could not say much, but he did say to the union lady "Millie, knows me and knows I would not say anything that was not good for her" then turning to me he said "Say as little as you can about anything right now." I was devastated. I had just lost my freedom of speech and I didn't know why, and he couldn't tell me.
Then a sisters family that lived near me turned on me. I went to the place where one was employed and was humiliated with the way I was treated.
The counseling wasn't doing anything to help me, so I turned to my church for help. The minister and another man came to my home and prayed for me about having demons. My last refuge was pulled out from under me. Ten years followed in which I would not even attend a church saying to myself "I am not going anywhere me and my demons aren't welcome."
I had hit bottom. I didn't even have my own vehicle at that time. It went in for repairs.
It was one of those times when you say if it could go wrong, it did. I had hit rock bottom.
I locked all my doors and closed all my curtains and laid down on my double bed and started to cry. It poured out of me until my chest ached with pain and I begged God for help.
Then I felt a movement on the other side of the bed as if someone put their knee on the bed and laid down beside me, and I felt an arm go around my shoulder. I knew I had locked all the doors! My tears stopped suddenly because I knew that either Jesus himself or an angel came at his bidding and put their arm around me. I didn't dare move because I so desperately needed that arm around me. I eventually could not feel anything and I knew inside myself that they had gone, but I was strenthened by that one gesture of love.
I called work and told them I was quitting and would come in the next day to fill out the papers. That was exactly what I did. As I was heading out the door, my supervisor who was in early that day chased me down and told me no one had even told him I was quitting. What ever was going on, some of it was being kept from him also. He wished me the best and gave me a big hug.
I got my car back and went out of state to find my son. I did not go to another counseling session again. I found another job and watched sermons on TV.
It took ten years before the Lord finally revealed to me what was going on at work. I was very outspoken about my faith at a time when government contracts were not given to companies that allowed religious discussions at work. There was always someone in a black suit at the end of the line watching me, to see what I was saying. That is why my boss tried to warn me. I solved their problem by quitting. Maybe the Lord wanted an opportunity to challenge their right to make me shut up. I do not know. I do know it was one of the blackest periods of my life and through it all, when even my own church turned on me, God came to my aid.
Churches are made up of people. Yes, even pastors are fallable. I needed a prayer of encouragement and he gave me demons. I later came to understand that a believer does have demons oppressing them. That is far different then possessing them. I didn't know that at the time though. Had he taught me about taking authority over them, or prayed a hedge of protection around me, anything that might have helped, but he didn't. It was just the final straw. I gave up on everyone and everything at that time. Yet God was still there to help me when I needed it so badly. He gave me the strength to go on.
I doubt if things are this low for you today, but whatever you are going through, remember, no one can help you like Jesus. Do you see why I want to pray for hurting people? He has helped me so many times and I know he is the only real answer. I could have been full of bitterness over losing a job that paid that good, but money is not everything. It bothers me if I failed God, but God knows me. I know too that he allowed all this for a reason other then a factory's good. Maybe this was a lesson to teach me that others can't help so I should always come to him first. I do know there have been few occasions when I felt so out of control and every time the devil was behind it, and almost everytime it cost me a job. So he is a thief and the bible says a thief must pay back seven times when he is caught. He is caught and he owes me big time. I was making twelve dollars an hour and that was over fifteen years ago. He had better start digging deep to repay me all that money.
The Lord just revealed something about that situation to me. I knew that whenever I was driven from a place that they seemed to get very low. This happened at that place, they laid off people, even the economy went high and the need for their products went extremely low. Peace reigned and they made products more needed in times of war. They were at the lowest I had ever heard they had been. God revealed to me this morning what had happened. Christians have the blessing of Abraham on them and part of that blessing is that he will bless those who bless you and curse those who curse you and all the families of the earth will be blessed through you. They cursed me, so they got cursed. The doors almost closed. And the earth got blessed with peace because God was fulfilling his word. What a wonderful savior we serve. He tells me all this fifteen years after it happened. He is so wonderful, don't you agree?
So please go to God first when things are rough. He wants to meet your needs. He loves you so much. You don't have to go it alone. No believer is ever alone. Someone will always pray for you and encourage you, even if the Lord must send them from heaven to do it. You are his loved one. We have so much to thank him for today and everyday.
Father, we give you our best and greatest gratitude for your presence. Thank you for just taking care of us daily and guiding us and meeting our needs when we are unable to do anything to help ourselves. You are so awesome and wonderful. I can't find the words to say how much I appreciate you today. Thank you, Lord. Amen.