It scared me a little bit, going back, but I didn't have much choice. The air was getting that feel to it, the feeling of morning and new chances. The sun would rise soon and no matter what was disquieting me it was going to. If it hadn't stopped when she died, this was surely not important enough, my miniscule insecurities.
She was most likely back in Angel's arms with the Scoobies looking on with those dazed expressions on their faces. But I couldn't complain; she was his first, hell she had never been mine anyway. But I loved her, loved everything that made her that witty, shining girl. Another fear surfaced, would she be that same girl. Being dead changed people, I should know.
Stepping foot inside the doors into the empty lobby I could already hear laughter. Not even back 24 hours yet and she had them smiling again. Selfishly I felt my anger swell within my chest as I remembered the time I had gotten to be with her all by myself. It was sickening, knowing that it was wrong and not being able to control it. A lot of things made me feel like that recently.
Heavy footsteps were echoing through the hollow expanse I was standing in. Angel's. "She still upstairs?" My voice more hopeful than I wanted it to be, words such as have you already taken her away being left unsaid.
"She's still in your room. Too tired to get up I think."
"Being dead'll do that to you. Speaking of, how many girlfriends do you plan on having come back from the grave?"
"Ex-girlfriends." I tried very hard not to smile as he spoke the words. She wasn't his again, not yet anyway. "She's been asking for you." I couldn't help it, and the little grin pushed my lips apart.
"Thanks for what you did this morning. I appreciate it."
"Least I could do. Put me up in your house, bought me some fags. A lot of drinks." Didn't steal the girl I'm in love with. The knot in my stomach loosened slowly and melted away. I didn't have to be afraid.
He glanced over at me, picking his eyes up from the floor. "What do you know about the spell Spike?"
"What's with the topic change?"
He sighed. "Just tell me, what do you know about the spell."
"That Red did it and that now Buffy's back. Why?"
"Nothing, forget I asked."
"Twice. No really, what is it. Can't tell your grandchilde? No secrets among family."
"Don't worry about it, just a question." He walked away into one of the back rooms, and I merely stood and watched him go. The sinking in my stomach came back, stronger than before.
I turned towards the window. Tiny little fingers of light were slowly slinking in. Nope my fear wouldn't stop the sun.
