So I’m sitting around, happy to be back at college and hanging out with what’s left of my friends. As I usually do once a year to affirm my belief that MTV and popular radio sucks, I watch the MTV Video Awards, or whatever they call that toned down horseshit nowadays.
We’re sitting around making great fun of the “festivities” Dave Chapelle (sp?) came out with the best line of the night: ”You guys’ll laugh at anything!” All to true, Mr. Chapelle! In any case, we were having a pretty bleak time watching the awards and shows (especially Yellowcard… a electric violin… in an emo band?) up until the Jessica Simpson.
This piece of stupid blonde shit decided to float in some kind of wannabe-wicker circle singing some pop song I’ve never heard before, then melding it into another “greatest hits” performance like all the performers (except maybe the actual bands) did that night. Do we really need to hear all three hits in Jessica Simpson’s ten-year career? Or all fifty in Little Johns two-year career? No. If the fucking song isn’t good enough to done in its entirety, you shouldn’t be playing it in front of millions of adoring (sheep) people.
What really got me was the new trendy thing of using your cell phones like they were fucking lighters at a Queen concert. W…T…F!? Did teenagers really need another reason to look like idiots? What, so you can’t even use your emo-infused finger-tips to strike a butane torch without crying? CELLPHONES! FUCKING GOD-BITCH-CUNTSWAGER WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH EVERYONE?!
This makes me want to revoke everyone’s right to vote under the age of 21, except for soldiers who should be allowed to vote and drink at 18 anyway. These people will be voting for the next president this year! Doesn’t that make anyone worry? Just another reason people shouldn’t be allowed credit cards, children, and voting privilages!
And what’s up with The Darkness? Could a band want to be Queen anymore? Its sad to even compare the two, since Queen was the fucking BAND! First New Wave comes back and now HAIR BANDS? And we thought the 80'’ were bad… the 2010’s are gonna be way worse…
Author: =][= Morok
Email: evilcanofjoy@kidsloveguns.com
