~ 2 ~ Joke
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"
~ 3 ~ Joke
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my four-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds.
She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"
~ 4 ~ Joke
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And why not, darling?" "You know that it always gives you a headache next morning."
~ 5 ~ Joke
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard collar wilt. Apparently, his five-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with the thought and sonourus way his father always said: "Glory be unto the Faaaather.. and unto the Sonnnn. . .....and into the hole he gooooes."
~ 6 ~ Joke
When my wife quit work to take care of our new baby daughter, countless hours of peekaboo and other games slowly took their toll. One evening my wife smacked her bare toes on the corner of a dresser and, grabbing her foot, sank to the floor. I rushed to her side and asked what she hurt. She looked at me through tear-filled eyes and managed to moan, "It's the piggy that ate roast beef."
~ 7 ~ Joke
Because of an ear infection, my young son, Casey, had to go to the pediatrician. I was impressed with the way the doctor directed his comments and questions to my son. When he asked Casey, "Is there anything you are allergic to?" Casey nodded and whispered in his ear. Smiling, the pediatrician wrote out a prescription and handed it to me. Without looking at it, I tucked it into my purse.
Later, the pharmacist filled the order, remarking on the unusual food-drug interaction my son must have. When he saw my puzzled expression, he showed me the label on the bottle.
As per the doctor's instructions, it read: "Do not take with broccoli."
~ 8 ~ Joke
A child opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell-out of the Bible. He picked-up the object, and looked at it closely. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Momma, look what I found," the boy called-out. "What have you got there, dear?" his mother asked. With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered: "I think
it's Adam's underwear!
~ 9 ~ Joke
"First Spanking"
Once there was a little boy who never got into trouble. One day, after being told repeatedly to stop bouncing the ball against the house, he broke a window. His dad said, "Go upstairs and think about what you've done and I'll be up to give you a spanking. So this little boy is sitting upstairs, scared because he's never gotten a spanking and doesn't know what it's like. About 20 minutes later, his dad
comes up, spanks him, then goes back downstairs. The little boy is just sitting there, crying. Suddenly he stops, pulls his pants down, and backs up to the mirror. He gasps in shock, then pulls his pants back up. He runs downstairs to his dad and says, "I hope you're satisfied daddy? You cracked it!"
~ 10 ~ Joke
On vacation with her family in Montana, a mother drove her van past a church in a small town and pointing to it, told the children that it was St. Francis' Church. "It must be a franchise," her eight-year-old son said. "We've got one of those in our town too."
~*~
I would like for you to meet one of our fine town locals Mr. McGillacutty. He's a very friendly gentleman that loves to help. He has volunteered to lead you to the next page if you would like to follow him. That is if we can stop him from dancing long enough. Or you can just click on to "Next" just under my guest book. One click will get you there in a flash. :) Hope to see you there!
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