Raspberries. There are not just a fruit. You may be able to buy them in shops and supermarkets, pluck them fresh from a bush, steal them from your sister’s bedroom, yet still they are not just a fruit.
Apples. Oranges. Pears. Grapes. Fruit.
Raspberries.
Firstly. The sound. Rasssssssss – pp – burree.
The elongated ‘rass’ noise is almost a hiss, snakelike, devilish, enticing. The sharp ‘pp’ gives the berry that cocky, slightly cheeky air about it. The ‘burree’ is warm and seductive.
Who have I just described? It certainly isn’t Elvis Presley.
Secondly. The taste.
I cannot find words to describe it. Why settle for chocolate? It sticks to your tongue, coats your mouth. Mint? Too acerbic, un-delicate.
Perhaps Shakespeare said it best –
Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?
Thou art more lovely and more temperate.
Rough winds do shake the darling buds of May,
And summer's lease hath all too short a date.
Sometime too hot the eye of heaven shines,
And often is his gold complexion dimm'd;
And every fair from fair sometime declines,
By chance or nature's changing course untrimm'd;
But thy eternal summer shall not fade
Nor lose possession of that fair thou ow'st;
Nor shall Death brag thou wander'st in his shade,
When in eternal lines to time thou grow'st:
So long as men can breathe or eyes can see,
So long lives this, and this gives life to thee.
Brings a tear to my eye. And who can forget Wordsworth’s comment about raspberries?
“The lust of the goat is the bounty of God.”
That one cracks me up every time, yet we all know of it’s deeper subtext into the actual philosophical layers of the raspberry. Don't we?
*nods from audience, and satisfied intellectual murmurs*
Thirdly. The colour.
Red, red, red like blood, like passion, like love, like death. Like Spike. Need I say more?
Fourthly, quotes.
This quote
“I can't do it, you say it's killing me, but you thrive, you glow on the street like a
neon raspberry. ” -
Marge Piercy, The Moon is Always Female
suggests that a raspberry, in fact a neon raspberry is glowing and beautiful and bright. Is there a quote stating things about neon apples? Neon chocolates? I think not.
And this quote
"Raspberry! There's only one man who would DARE give me the raspberry...! Loooone Staaaar!"
– Dark Helmet, Spaceballs
shows us that only a man of great daring and bravery would dare offer somebody a raspberry. It is widely known that Spike feels he possesses these qualities, and so would see consuming large quantities of raspberry ice cream as sticking a finger up at the world: something he wants to do.
In my opinion, ice cream choice sorts the men (metaphorically speaking) from the mice (also a metaphor, as mice prefer cornflakes). Raspberry is the choice of a bad ass vampire, who is no longer able to be bad ass, and wishes to flaunt the very bad nature of his ass (although I actually think it’s a nice ass) by eating…
Raspberry Ice Cream.
*cue national anthem, salutes all around, the Prime Minister and visiting President wipe away tears from their eyes. Swirly stops before taking a bow, and points to a picture of a raspberry.*
Don’t thank me. Thank the raspberry!
*rapturous applause*