She didn't know how to approach him with the news that she had gotten laid off. If she had known that it was coming, she could have laid the ground work, built up to it and could have evaded a session of his explosive temper. Now, the damage was done and she would suffer the consequences even though she had no hand in the whims of fate.

  Stacia's hands tightened on the steering wheel of her old Chevy Blazer. Her knuckles slowly turned white as her grip on the wheel increased.

  "Why am I even bothering to go home?" she whispered.

  As her exit approached, Stacia fought a battle within herself. If she left Antonio, she come away with nothing...nothing but her self-respect and the old Blazer that she had bought and paid for in the old days, her independent days, before Antonio had slid into her life.

  Her foot pushed the gas pedal to the floor and the car zoomed by the exit. She reached down and shook a cigarette loose from the pack beside her and lit it, inhaling deeply.

  "Now what? Turn off at the next exit and go back to the bastard so that he can tell me what a loser I am?"

  Her mind was a whirl of memories and flash backs recounting the three years she had spent living with Antonio. A hard light came into her eyes as they narrowed into angry slits.

  "No, I’m not going back like some animal who’s spirit’s  been broken by a cruel master! God damn it! I'm better than that!"

  Stacia had the speedometer pegged as the Blazer sped like a bullet down the dark highway. The car sped past the next exit and her hands loosened on the steering wheel.

  As the dark landscape sped past her, she remembered when she had announced to Antonio that she was pregnant. His jaw had tightened and all the color had drained out of his face.

  "I don’t want some brat running around messing up the place."

  "What do you mean? You wouldn’t let me take birth control. I thought you wanted a baby."

  "I just didn’t want you full of those hormones. My ex turned into a bitch on the pill. Look, either you go take care of this, or I will after it’s born."

  Antonio put both of his hands on her shoulders and started to squeeze.

  "So, do we understand each other? Get rid of it, or I will."

  Stacia had started to cry and Antonia pushed her to the floor. He threw the phone book at her and went to get the telephone handset.

  "You’re going to call a clinic and schedule an abortion as soon as possible. You’re not going to cry again and once it’s over, we’re going to forget this ever happened. And, you’ll make damn sure it doesn’t happen again! Now, stop your blubbering and get that appointment scheduled!"

  Antonio drove her to the clinic the next day. Stacia signed the papers, numbly submitted to the exam and then to the abortion. The sound of the machine came back to her in dreams that left her gasping for air. After it was over, Antonio took her home, treated her as if she were a delicate flower, pampering her with kindness and attention. It was never mentioned again, but Stacia never forgave him.

  Stacia saw the sign for the Thruway ahead.

  ‘Should I head South or North?"

  She slowed the Blazer and decided on North. Canada, open spaces, lots of green, lakes, places to get lost, clean air and a new beginning. She turned onto the ramp, stepped on the gas and sped into a life without Antonio and she never looked back.