Although the day started off with a good rhythm, right on schedule, nothing surprising, things went to hell as soon as Marci started her drive to work.

  Damn! Why do they have to start road construction during rush hour! Stupid idiots.

  The traffic was not even moving at a snails pace. Everyone sat in their cars, with engines running burning gas, as the heat rose from the black pavement, fraying nerves and shortening tempers.

  The man in the big, black SUV in front of Marci's little Cavalier, put his car in park, opened the door and jumped down to the pavement.  He paced next to his SUV for a while then looked at his watch, threw up his arms, and started yelling.

  "Damn it, damn it, damn it," he chanted over and over.  When he started towards Marci's car, she cranked up the window and wished she could disappear.

  God! Traffic jam and now a nut case coming over here. Could it get any worse?

  "Hey, lady!  Open your window!" he yelled as he made cranking signals with his hand.

  Marci moaned to herself and wished he would just go away, but he continued to signal to her though the window making those stupid cranking signs with his hands.

  Marci rolled the window down a little.

  "I just got off my cell.  Looks like we're going to be here a while.  Seems that one of the crew got stream rolled," the man explained as he sweated profusely.

  Marci's stomach lurched at the thought of a human being getting pancaked by thousands of pounds of rolling steel.

  "God, that's awful," she managed to say through waves of nausea.

  "You don't look too good lady.  Look, don't say nothing to anyone, but I have a bottle of whiskey in my briefcase and some ice cold Brita water in my thermos. Do you want a little whiskey and water to settle your nerves?"

  Marci couldn't help but laugh.  It was all so bizarre.

  Maybe I'm having one of those realistic dreams where everything seems real, but is just a little off.

  "My name is Barney Fiffer," the man offered.  "I'm going to go get that drink for you and God knows I could use one, too!"

  Marci settled her head back on the headrest and closed her eyes.

  I just want to go back home and crawl into bed and start all over again.

  Barney returned to Marci's car with two bright red plastic cups and tapped on Marci's windshield waiting for her to open the window wider.

  Oh what the hell!  The day is already shot.

  Marci motioned Barney off a bit and got out of her car and took the red cup filled with whiskey and water.  She took a sip and started coughing.

  "Scheesch, Barney!  Did you put any water in here?"

  "Just a scooch. Why dilute good whiskey? Hey, what's your name?"

  "Marci."

  Soon people were leaving the security and confinement of their cars to stand outside on the pavement talking and joking with each other.  Barney made his rounds with his briefcase and thermos and soon, the traffic jam took on the appearance of a neighborhood street party. Marci was feeling the effect of the whiskey all the way to her toes.

  What the hell was I thinking? If any one of those cops head this way, we're all screwed. Drinking during a traffic jam at 8:15 in the morning!

  Marci headed back to her car feeling as if her legs were made of jello. The heat was starting to get to her and she was worried about showing up for work tanked up.

  I'm gonna have to head home and call in sick if this damn traffic jam ever starts moving.

  She got in her car and started it up and cranked the air conditioner. She could see Barney pouring the last of the whiskey into his red cup and downing it all in one swallow.

  Geeze, I hope he doesn't head back over here. I can't deal with that man.

  Soon, three State Police cruisers were heading down the side of the road. They pulled up where Barney and his party crowd were standing. The officers got out of their cars and began lining people up against their cars.

  Oh shit! I have to just sit here quietly, not looking anywhere but straight ahead. Stay cool Marci!

  It was then that Marci saw the glaringly red plastic cup on her passenger seat. She reached over slowly and jammed the cup way under her seat and for good measure took the newspaper that she had planned on reading during her morning break and stuffed that under her seat on top of that damned red cup.

  Traffic started to move ahead and the people whom the troopers weren't detaining started to inch forward slowly. Marci had to pull around Barney's SUV by going on the shoulder of the road and she was happy when it was just a black blob in her rear view mirror. She was driving with a paranoid edge and as soon as she came to a side street, she pulled onto it.

  I just have to get home safely...I just have to stay nice and straight on the road. Home, that's all I want now!

  After a ten minute drive down side streets, Marci pulled into her driveway. She put her Cavalier in park and turned off the engine.

  What the hell was that all about? It was like I drove into the twilight zone.

  When Marci walked into her house, she locked the door behind her and went straight upstairs to her room and flopped on the bed. She just wanted to forget everything that had transpired since she left for work. It all seemed like some far out day dream, but she knew it wasn't because the whiskey had hit her like a ton of bricks.

  Who'd believe me?
 
  Marci called into work saying she was sick, turned over on her side and fell immediately to sleep.

  What the hell is that sound? Who's knocking on my door. Damn!

  When Marci opened her eyes, she was in her Cavalier and there was a State Trooper knocking on her car window.

  "Lady, you're holding up traffic. If you want to sleep, go home and do it! Right now, get going!"

  Marci didn't think twice. She put her car into drive and slowly drove away from the trooper who was shaking his head. When Marci reached the convenient store a few miles from her office, she pulled into the parking lot and reached under her seat. She had expected to find the newspaper and that damned red cup, but instead found nothing. When she looked at her passenger seat, there was her neatly folded newspaper.

  She cupped her hand around her mouth and breathed out. No liquor smell. No cup. No sense!!

  Okay. It was all a dream when I fell asleep in the car in the traffic jam. Yup. That's all it was.

  Just as Marci was going to pull out of the parking lot, a big black SUV pulled up next to her car. It was Barney doing the crank thing with his hand. Marci stepped on the gas and pulled out of the parking lot burning rubber. She didn't stop till she got to work.

  Well, at least I got here alright.

  Marci unlocked her office door, turned on the light and there sitting in her chair was Barney with that damned red cup.

  When the rest of the workers arrived, they found Marci under her desk in a fetal position. No one knows what sent her over the edge...but I bet a big, sweaty man with a red plastic cup knows...

muhahahahahahaaaaa