Sherman Schrader: Ask me about my wiener!
Abernathy: [raises hand straight up in air and
jumps around] When I got accepted here, it was the first time my
parents
ever said they were proud of me!
Freaky Student: I want to learn how to blow up
shit with my mind.
Bartleby Gaines: I got a tradition for you.
Schrader,
you've been my best friend since we were 5 years old. That's the only
tradition
I know.
Sherman Schrader:
Let's start this fake college. Then, we'll go start a meth lab
somewhere. It's a gateway crime. That's how these things start.
Bartleby Gaines:
What the hell happened?
Glen:
An explosion of flavor. I'm working with some very unstable herbs.
Uncle Ben:
I'm going off the grid. No more Franchises, no more botox, no more
"Hey, oh, lets clone another goat," and certainly no more sexual
harassment lawsuits, what's wrong with saying "Hey, nice tits." When
did that go out the window?
Sherman Schrader:
[about entering the abandoned building] I hope you
have hobo stab insurance.
Bartleby Gaines:
Schrader, what about you?
Sherman Schrader:
Well, B, I'm glad you asked actually, cuz since were going to prison, I
wanna learn how to carve a shank out of my toothbrush.
Uncle Ben:
Health insurance my ass! They don't pay for shit. You get sick on a
Friday, they only pay from Monday through Thursday. You go to doctor A,
they only pay for doctor B. You break your penis, they only fix
vaginas!
Bartleby Gaines:
I could go to jail.
Uncle Ben:
Don't worry, you're young. Your butt can take it.