"In Canada we have more than a passing familiarity with confusion. We're comprised of 10 provinces and two territories communicating across 6 time zones in 2 official languages. The English don't understand the French, the French don't understand the English, and the Inuit quite frankly couldn't give a damn about either of them. Added to the equation is the Assembly of First Nations, with a total of 633 separate Indian bands, speaking 180 sub-dialects among their 50 linguistic groups; and as if that weren't enough there are some fishermen on the East coast with a remarkably whimsical accent." -- Fraser
"Being Canadian is harder than it looks."
Detective Ray Kowalski, while stuck in Constable Benton Fraser's
body (and not in a fun way) in the Due South fanfic "Being Benton Fraser"
by Theodosia
Fraser was great looking. Blind lesbian armadillos would have to give
a unanimous yea to that.
- from the 'due South' slashfic 'Boulder', by Rentgirl2
"Milk in a bag," he muttered. "What will you Canadians come up with
next?"
"Universal health care. Same-sex marriage," I offered blandly.
- Ray Kawolski and Constable Benton Fraser,
'due South' story "Telephone", by The Hoyden
From the Due South fic 'Learn to Speak Canine in Seven Easy Steps'
by etcetera_cat. Told from Dief's POV:
Diefenbaker on humankind: 'Master species of the planet? Only
because they invented Krispy Kreme.'
and
Bob Fraser (Fraser's Dad): Contrary to what popular folklore
would have you believe; dead men do tell tales.
Diefenbaker grumbles to himself: Seemingly endless tales.
You let a wolf save your life, and then you pay and pay and pay and pay. -- Benton Fraser
I thought I was in love once. And then, later, I thought it was maybe just an inner ear imbalance. -- Fraser
"It was an otter, I was ten, it was dead, someone
hit me with it. Can we move on?"
-Benton Fraser, Letting Go
There is nothing more frustrating than playing hide and seek with a deaf wolf. -- Fraser
"I just made a curling reference. I'm going to lie down." -- Ray K
My idea of health is a cup of coffee without sugar. -- Ray K
How to become a Canadian in 10 easy steps: Step 1.. get a big hat; Step 2.. lick electrical sockets..-- Ray K
Do you know what I love about Canadians? They're really easy to elbow out of the way.-- Ray V.
The Canadian?! The Canadian is the killer? Oh, that is so unCanadian.-- Ray V.
You're not a mind reader Fraser. Your just a Canadian. -- Ray V.
I've been to Toronto. Trust me. Nothing can survive there. -- Francesca
Huey, to Gardino: Louis, try to grasp this concept. A Mountie and a badly dressed Italian are solving more cases than we are.
Ray K:"I don't know who had less sex, me
or you. But, at least I still think of women. Is that better or worse?"
Fraser: "Interesting question."
Stella: Think you're smart, don't you?
Kowalski: Nah, you're the smart one -
I'm just pretty.
"He's very nice... so polite."
"He's Canadian, Ma."
"Oh, I thought he was sick or something."
-Mrs. Vecchio, Ray Vecchio, re Fraser
RCMP Boss: I talked to the Super at your
last job. He suggested transferring you further north.
Fraser: Well, that would put me in Russia,
sir.
Dennis (the landlord): On a good day you
can see Canada just across the lake.
Fraser: Canada is 480 miles due north.
Dennis: You have to really squint.
Fraser: I need your help, Ray.
Ray: Does it involve domestic animals?
Fraser: Not that I am aware.
Ray: Then I'm your man.
Fraser: I'm not certain but it sounds like
'doowsh, doowsh.' What does that sound like to you?
Ray: How about the sound of my job going
down the toilet? I'm sitting in a dark closet with a Mountie being licked
by a deaf wolf. That was the wolf, wasn't it?
Fraser: Yes, Ray.
Ray: Oh, thank God!
Fraser: You know, you--you let a wolf save
your life, they make you pay and pay and pay...
Ray: That's why I don't own a wolf.
Ray: I want a state by state countdown
until we get to Winnipeg.
Fraser: Windsor.
Ray: Yeah, like there's a difference.
Ray: You don't want to know why I'm wearing
your uniform.
Fraser: I just assumed it was something
personal.
Ray: You know, Benny, you weren't a bad
looking woman.
Fraser: Thank you, Ray.
Ray: You weren't exactly my type either.
Fraser: Well, what exactly is your type,
Ray?
Ray: Oh, I like a woman who is kind and
honest with a good sense of humor.
Fraser: Well, I don't have those qualities?
Ray: No, you do. I just like a woman who
is, you know, a woman.
Fraser: Oh, that's picky, Ray.
Ray: Oh, don't get in a snit.
Fraser: Oh, I'm not.
Ray: Oh, good.
Fraser: Oh, fine.
Ray: So, what are you doing after work?
Fraser: Nothing with you.
Ray: You are ssooo sensitive.
Vecchio: Does the word "incarcerate" mean
anything to you?!?
Fraser: Well it's from the Medieval Latin,
incarcerata . . .
Vecchio: Medieval Latin? You let a perp
go and you're giving me Medieval Latin?
Fraser: Actually, perpetrator is also
Latin, from perpetrare . . .
Vecchio: Shut up, ok? Just shut up.
--- Free Willie
RAY: "Your hair is who you are, Fraser.
It makes a statement. ... If it's straight and slicked back so it's got
that 'mess with me and you're dead' style. Good for the job. The contouring
around the ears? That's unexpected. That says 'watch out, this guy might
be dangerous,' and then thefeathering around the back? Well, that's a nod
to the female demographic. So what's it saying? It's saying 'deadly and
dangerous but not afraid to cry."
FRASER: "Really? What does my hair say?"
RAY: "Oh, that's not hair, Fraser. That's
a pelt."
Benny, I could kiss you!"
"I thought we were just friends?"
"We are." -- Ray and Fraser
FRASER: "I think the person who invented
pantyhose should be brought up on charges of cruelty, sadism and reckless
endangerment. They pinch in the most inappropriate places."
RAY: "Yeah, well, most people who wear
'em don't have those places."
an exchange while Fraser was attempting to change from his
disguise to his uniform in the back of Ray's car,
Some Like it Red
FRASER: "Ray?....Manners."
RAY: "Ya know Benny..there's a limit."
FRASER: "A limit to good etiquette? I
think not Ray."
RAY: "Just get in the car before I beat
you with your purse."
Some Like it Red