The bright orange sun streaming through Isaac and
Taryn’s living room window woke Taylor up. He lay on his back for a moment, grinning at the sound of his nieces trying to be quiet in the kitchen as they ate their breakfasts and got ready to go to school.
“Can you pour the milk on my cereal?” he heard Clara whisper to Iris.
Taylor sat up and stretched. “It’s okay, Clarabelle,” he said. “I’m awake.”
A broad smiled covered Clara’s porcelain-smooth face, and she ran to the living room. She bounced on the foot of the pullout bed. “What are you doing here, Uncle Taylor?”
Taylor ruffled Clara’s trademark Hanson blonde curls. “I couldn’t wait to see you.”
Clara giggled. Taylor saw Iris smile.
“Come on and eat, Clara,” Iris said. “The carpool is going to be here to take you to school soon. You want a bowl of cereal, Taylor?”
Clara hopped off the couch and took her seat at the table. Taylor followed her into the kitchen, which was separated from the living room by a bar. “Not now, but juice would be good.”
Iris nodded. “Okay,” she said. “Sit down and I’ll grab it for you.”
Taylor watched as Iris settled Clara in with her breakfast. Iris had been all of nine years old when Taylor had met her, and he marveled at how fast she had grown. She had just started her sophomore year in high school. She had celebrated her 15th birthday earlier that month, and she was one of the most mature kids he had ever met. Isaac was in the process of adopting her.
Taylor started thinking about all his younger brothers and sisters as well. What kind of role model was he being for them?
Iris caught Taylor staring at her. She looked down at her maize-colored sweater and blue jeans. “What?” she said, running her hands through her golden-brown, bobbed hair. “Did I spill something on myself?”
Taylor smiled and shook his head. “No,” he said. “I’m just thinking about how fast all of you are growing. I’m just lucky to be able to be a part of the lives of so many phenomenal people.”
Iris smiled slowly. “What’s with the sudden burst of corniness? You writing for Hallmark now?”
Taylor smiled back at Iris. “I’m serious,” he said. “But we do need to talk sometime soon.”
Iris looked at Taylor quizzically. Before she could grill him further, Taryn and Isaac emerged from their bedroom. Taryn was dressed in a red skirt and blazer, and was putting her earrings on. Iris poured her mother a cup of coffee and set it on the bar for her.
“God, you’re a good girl,” Taryn said, touching the side of Iris’ face.
“I’m a good girl, too,” Clara chortled.
Isaac kissed the top of his younger daughter’s head. “Yes, you are,” he said. “We here at the Hanson house have the market cornered on good girls.”
Isaac, Taryn and Iris sat down at the table and began to chatter. Taylor watched them interact. I want this, he thought to himself. I know that Isaac has worked hard for it, but I envy him. I want it too. Taylor watched his brother’s family for another minute. Unfortunately, he admitted to himself, I also want to be using right now.
A honking horn alerted Clara that her ride to preschool was outside. “Gotta go!” she said. She kissed each member of the family at the table, and Iris walked her to the door.
After Clara was on her way to school, Iris and Taryn gathered their things. Taryn kissed Isaac and gently touched Taylor’s face. “We’ll see you later,” she said. “Today will be rough, but it’ll get better.”
Taylor smiled gratefully at Taryn. “Thanks for letting me crash.”
Taryn nodded. “Anytime.”
Iris began to walk out the door. “Hey!” Isaac called. “Do I not rate hugs anymore?”
Iris rolled her big brown eyes. “Don’t you think I’m getting a little old for this?” she said, as she relented and gave Isaac a quick hug.
“Never,” Isaac said.
Iris chuckled. “Whatever,” she said. “You’re nuts.”
After Taryn and Iris left, Taylor and Isaac sat at the kitchen table, drinking their juice and reading the paper.
“When do you go to court?” Isaac asked.
“Day after tomorrow,” Taylor said.
Isaac nodded. The brothers sat in silence for a while, each lost in their own sections of the newspaper.
A bit of time passed, and Taylor began to feel strange. He began to bite his nails. “I think the withdrawal is starting, Ike.”
Isaac put down his newspaper. “What makes you think so?”
Taylor’s breathing became a little faster. “I feel like I’m sweating from the inside out,” he said. “And I’m real shaky.”
Isaac got up and helped Taylor back to the couch. “Take it easy,” he said. “Don’t get excited. That’ll only make things worse.”
“I want some, Ike. I can’t help it.”
Isaac patted Taylor’s shoulder. “Lay back and close your eyes,” he said. “Try to sleep.”
Taylor was sleeping restlessly in a matter of minutes. Isaac went to the kitchen. He pulled a chair up to the bar, and watched with a breaking heart as Taylor’s entire body shuddered while he slept. Isaac sighed and picked up the cordless phone that sat on the bar. He dialed the number of his and Taylor’s younger brother, Zac, who was attending college at the University of Michigan.
Zac picked up on the second ring.
“Hello?”
“Hey, Zac.”
“Hey, Ike! What’s up? You don’t usually call me during the week.”
Taylor flopped heavily onto his side. Isaac turned away. He couldn’t watch anymore.
“It’s not good news,” Isaac said.
Zac, who had been lying on his couch studying, sat up quickly. “What’s wrong?”
“It’s Tay,” Isaac said. “He’s gotten in over his head.”
Zac bit his lip. “Is it drugs?” he asked quietly. Zac had detected a change in Taylor’s behavior when they had been on tour over the summer, but he had chosen to write it off as an adrenaline high and ignore his nagging suspicions.
“Yes,” Isaac said.
“Shit,” Zac said. “What happened?”
“He has himself a monster crystal meth problem,” Isaac said. “He got picked up with an ounce in the Jeep last night. He goes to court day after tomorrow.”
“Oh, no,” Zac said. “Where is he? Can I talk to him?”
“Right now he’s sleeping,” Isaac said. “I’m not a doctor or anything, but I think he’s starting to go through withdrawal.”
“Shouldn’t you take him to a doctor?” Zac asked worriedly.
“Not yet, I don’t think,” Isaac said. “I’m pretty sure they’re going to court order some kind of rehab, though. For now, I think it's better that he’s where he’s comfortable. And I want him to rally a little before Mom sees him. He looks just awful.”
Zac closed his book gently. “I’m coming home,” he said.
Isaac nodded. “That’s probably a good idea,” he said. “I hate to drag you away from school, but I can’t handle this on my own. And Mom and Dad … it would put Taylor right over the edge if they had to take care of him the way he’s going to be in the next few months. Plus Taylor’s going to need someone to stay with him at his place. I would, but I’ve got kids. I just can’t.”
“It’s okay,” Zac said firmly. “I’ll just come back to school in the winter or the spring. You need me right now. I’ll go talk to the counselor as soon as I get off with you, and I’ll be back in Tulsa by the time Taylor’s court date comes up.”
Isaac walked over to the couch. He gently brushed a strand of Taylor’s sweaty bangs from his forehead. “We’ll get through this,” he said.
Zac nodded. “Of course we will,” he said with conviction. “We just have to stick together.”
