Web Journal

August 5, 1998 7:31 PM EDT

HOWDEEE!!! (That was my Minnie Pearl impersonation, in case you were wondering.) It's Wednesday and I have survived a week and 1/2 of working full time. Everything there is okie dokie. I'm starting to learn how much I don't know. I'm enjoying the work but missing this journal, and Growlf and Sheba. Dr. Steve suggested I make a sign and put it up at work as I write these pages everyday. Maybe I can get him to write me a prescription saying I have to write so many pages every day (while at work) for health reasons!

Joe does so much around this house (yes, I know how lucky I am.) If he didn't, we wouldn't be able to find our way out of here to get to work or anywhere else.

Had a neat weekend. Went to a picnic at my cousins', Mike & Kathy's house. It was a celebration for their niece, Jennifer, who was getting married the next evening. Mike and Kathy have an incredible yard, all these enormous maple trees. He built his own golf driving range up behind the house. I'm not into golf so it was wasted on me but to those who play, this must be near the ultimate! Great to see all my cousins: Pat, Mike, and Marty and their families, and their families' families. I don't think I've spent time with all 3 of them together since we were kids. Pat and her husband, Chris, just spent the last two weeks moving back here from California. It's neat-- she hasn't lived here since she finished high school back in the early sixties! But I know it has to be hard for her, such a change, coming back to old Wash PA. and leaving her job, friends, selling her house. I'm in awe. What kind of drugs is she on??? Must be better than mine! Finally got to meet Marty's wife, Cindy, and their three daughters, Hannah, Sue, and Kara. They're visiting from South Carolina, staying at Majorsville while in town. All of them are beautiful (Marty, I hope you know how lucky you are!) Also hope the snakey snakes and mice haven't been driving you nuts in the country.

Joe's going to a Steeler preseason game this weekend, courtesy of a vendor from work. Hope they don't stink up the place as bad as they did last week (shudder, shudder.) Joe is just a little bit of a FANatic. We get to listen to sports radio on our way home from work everyday. Myron Cope. The Steeler update. The Post Gazette sports pages. Is there anything else to life? Not if you're a guy living in southwestern PA, and football season is starting up.

Gotta go make some din. Having Chicken Fried Rice & Veges, and for a special treat, Cream cheese stuffed jalepeno pepper poppers. Oh yeah, I can dig it. Joe's been busy mowing and thinking I was in here cooking.... oops... guess I'd better get a move on (as my mom used to say). Hey, it's all frozen food, not like I'm going down there to slave over the hot stove or anything!

love you all... (and those of you, you know who you are, who get a kick out of reading this with your little red editing pen in hand, give me a break. I know there are a bazillion and one mistakes. But at least I'm writing.)

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August 1, 1998 8:12 AM EDT

Planned on sleeping in today. Worked all week so I’m pretty tired. But someone forgot to tell the construction crew outside. (In case you don’t know, we’ve been having work done on our street since March. They were supposed to be done by July. Now they are saying maybe November.) Five a.m. this morning, it’s BUMPA -BUMPA-BUMPA-BUMPA (jack-hammering) and BEEP, BEEP, BEEP (backing up)…. My nerves I tell you, my nerves!

As far as I can tell, all they ever accomplish is digging big holes, then filling them back in, then digging them back up again. That and make noise and oh yeah, don’t forget the big billowing clouds of dirt.

Found some new wav files and uploaded them on the sound page (for you, Merle.) Also added to my picture collection. The friends pictures are from my writing friends from Writers University. Judith lives on Vancouver Island, Chet is in Malaysia, and Peg from Austrailia. It’s great having a faces to go with their stories and such. Also, loaded a picture of the old house at Majorsville. It’s a beauty. (Thanks Marty.) One of these days I’m going to get around to devoting a whole page to just Majorsville (or more likely, many pages. There are so many stories to tell.)

Working in the Oakland section of Pittsburgh this past week has been bizarre. I’m in a nice section, very classy, a bit yuppie-fied. Haven’t had much time to explore but on my way to the bank the other day, I spied a couple of promising looking restaurants and shops…. Lu Lu’s Noodles (Pan -Asian Cuisine), Phantom of the Attic (comic books & such), a neat looking Irish store. In the building where I’m working is the Webster Hall Deli. Run by a couple of nice guys, Dick and Brian, I think are their names. They set up tables outside at lunch under a big awning, near where I take my smoking breaks. Dick has a bulletin board mounted near the cash register and it’s full of dog pictures. I asked him about it and he said customers brought in snapshots of their dogs. Said they were all a bunch of dog lovers. Neat. The International Poetry Forum has its headquarters in the building. No one ever seems to be in there but it sure looks like an interesting place.

Last spring I interviewed for (and wanted badly) a job at Pitt, working for Dr. Andrew Strathern and his wife, Dr. Pamela Stewart. They were both really neat people, and very well known in the Anthropology field. Every summer they conduct field studies in New Guinea so I was worried about them being caught in the tsunami that occurred there a couple of weeks ago. Sent them an email and Dr. Stewart wrote me back they are both fine, working in the highlands, no where near the coast. Thank God for that.

Big doings in the family happening here this weekend. My aunt’s granddaughter, Jennifer, is getting married. She and her fiance live in the state of Washington but have come here for the ceremony. Their families are coming in from all over…. California, North Dakota. The wedding is Monday evening and unfortunately, Joe and I probably won’t be home from work in time to attend. But there’s going to be a big picnic on Sunday at my cousin Mike’s house. We look forward to that. My other cousin, Marty, and his family are due in from South Carolina today. They will be staying at Majorsville for a few days.

Haven’t had time to write a thing all week , except for in my other journal (the one where I keep the real dirt (you didn’t think I was telling you all my secrets, did you? Not hardly.) My family and friends have been such godsends this past week, calling and emailing me. I couldn’t function without them. Hope you all know how much I love you .

Ta ta…

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July 28, 1998 6:40 PM EDT

I'm baaaacccckkkk! You probably thought I wasn't existing anymore, since I haven't been able to write in here for a long, long time. But you were wrong... I do exist, I do exist, I do exist.

Had my first day of work yesterday. I'll tell you this, I fell into bed last night at 8 PM and was sawing zzzzz's but 8:05.

Had this bizarre dream. Joe took me to my ex-husband's house. He, my ex, was still married to that bimbo, er, I mean, lovely lady that he betrothed after our divorce. Anyway, in the dream, they had three kids, a girl about 10 years old, a boy who was 9, and a little girl of 3. Joe and I were in the gameroom of their house and they were in the middle of getting a new floor put in, made out of tiny pebbles, almost like cat litter in texture. Being the wonderfully forgiving person that I am, I picked up a bucket of that flooring material (cat litter) and threw it right in my ex-husband's face. Then I grabbed his wife by her hair and tried to tear it out by it's roots.

I'm not going to bother trying to analyze that one-- me thinks a wee bit of anger still remains!

Had a great time at Majorsville over the weekend. Saw a whole flock of wild turkeys (is it called a flock?) waddling down the hillside behind the house. Their coloring blended so well with the woods that when they weren't moving, honest to god, they disappeared. But when they moved, it looked as if the ground was alive! I thought at first it was a family but if so, then turkeys must not be monogamous because their were 5 adults and 7 or 8 little ones. Anyway, it was pretty cool. Much more fun than snakes and mice. Also spied one of the latter, out of the corner of my eye, whizzing passed me in the kitchen. Oooohhh! He must be Mighty Mouse-- I've got Decon and snakes all over the place. The beavers, who have been out of sight for awhile are back. They've built a huge dam on the creek, right in front of the house and used some of the little trees Joe and I had planted.... grrrr. I don't like trapping but these little buggers would make someone a nice coat!

I guess I'd better quit. Joe's hungry. Me too. It's almost a quarter after seven and we still have to go grocery shopping before we can eat dinner. So, afterwhile crocodile.....

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July 24, 1998 7:25AM EDT

This day is bizarre.

First I woke up from these nightmares that were the kind that are coated with some kind of molasses substance, kept sucking me back in, over and over. And these weren’t the usual run-of-the-mill nightmares I have every night but rather apocalyptic in nature, end of the world stuff, demons running about laughing maniacally, suffering everywhere you look… Now that I think about it, these were the usual kind, just variations on a theme. Never mind.

Merle told me yesterday she couldn’t view my guest book. I tried it today & got some gibberish about error 3700. Went to GuestWorld to locate their technical help. Nothing in their FAQ, then I found a page with a complaints from a gazillion other people having the same problem with their guest books… Here’s the bizarre part, doesn’t appear to be any way to actually talk with anyone at GuestWorld… even their own guest book isn’t working!!!

Just burned a hole in my mouse pad. Surprised it hadn’t been done before-- my ashtray is always overflowing and most of the cigarettes I smoke while I’m up here, don’t really get smoked, they sit in the ashtray until they’ve burned themselves down to butts, then they fall out (this time onto my mouse pad.)

I start a new job on Monday. Not the one I was originally interviewing for yesterday. Turned out I had two interviews (a friend called me the night before to arrange this one.) So that’s pretty cool. It’s working for an attorney, full time, over in Oakland, just around the corner from where my old office for Western Psych was located (nice area.) We’ve decided it’s a temporary thing until we make sure we are both comfortable. Wow, this is big news… don’t think it’s hit me yet. Wait until Sunday night, I’ll probably be gobbling xanax like they were Pez or something.

Joe is excited for me. We’ll get to ride to work together again and drink coffee from our Brugger’s Bagel travel mugs (to say nothing of being able to pay a few bills around here!!)

I’m falling terribly behind in my writing assignments. And it’s probably going to get worse before it gets better. Today I want to get junk together to go to Majorsville over the weekend… a little R & R down there can do wonders.

Hollywood Dave emailed me. Said his boss doesn’t like for him to use the email for purposes other than business. Gee, what a turd. I know some of us, er, I mean, some people, abuse the privilege and ruin it for the rest of you, er, I mean, the rest of us. At any rate, it was wonderful hearing from Dave. I’m emailing him back, don’t care what his boss says… Might have to include the following:

*************************************************************
Dear David’s Boss,

Quit being so mean and let my nephew write to me using email!! You are lucky to have David working for you. Don’t you know we Alleys are geniuses and wonderful, caring people?

Sincerely,
David’s Aunt Jani

P.S. I know some nuns who will do bad things to you if you don’t cooperate. You don’t want to go to Hades and sizzle and fry, do you???
***************************************************************

Well folks, (don’t you hate when people write "folks", sounds so insincere) anyway, have a nice weekend!!!! Thanks for reading this dribble. Email me since my stupid guest book isn’t working!

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July 21, 1998 12:44PM EDT

Son of a b-tch…. This is the third time I’ve tried writing today’s entry. It keeps disappearing into cyberspace. I hate when that happens. So where was I?

Oh yes, believe I started out by saying it's Ruby Tuesday! I talked to my old boss Tish yesterday. See she found her way to this site-- she left me a note in my guestbook.... private... ha ha Steven, you can't read it.

My big news: I've got an interview scheduled this week! Yeah! I'm not going to jinx it by saying too much, only that I sent a letter and resume early in June and thought they had passed me up by now. Big question to go with my big news is do I really want to go back to work? Hmmm, we've discussed this before. I want the money.... show me the money. But I'm loving the time I have and the things I'm learning right now.... this web stuff, my writing and literature classes.

Regarding the African Literature I'm reading, here's a funny story.... Dr. Steve, my nephew who sometimes thinks he's a character from Gilligan's Island, knows [Chinua Achebe]'s son. Can you believe-- they work together! Next up in that class, we're reading Bessie Head. I've been told so many wonderful things about her, I'm almost afraid to read the story... what if I hate it or something? I'd never be able to admit it or I'd look like an idiot!!!!

Speaking of idiots... the creativity seminar has gone so far passed me... I feel like "little brain" or maybe "no brain." Guess it would help if I'd do the reading but one of the first reading assignments called for us to read the [Spiritual Exercises of St. Ignatius], uh huh.

So, Joe finally got his ICQ to work at work… now we can chat. Cool. Like he really doesn’t have anything better to do than chat with me. But, at least it’s free, unlike the telephone!

Chatted with my cousin Marty this morning. He sent me fine pictures which I’ll be putting on my picture page soon. Also talked to my bud Chet in Malaysia. She sent me a couple of pics of her family also. I love this machine when it’s working right!

Better go do something besides play on here though…. Until we meet again…..

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July 20, 1998 11:04AM EDT

A local grocery store stocks this brand of candles. The display tells me they are made in Pennsylvania, manufactured from a company called Cranberry Harbor. You can buy them in various scents. But I am addicted to the ones called "RAIN". I don't know whether they smell like rain or not-- the only smell I ever associate with rain is that ozone smell. I guess maybe there is a little of this present, whatever...

Anyway, a few months ago I bought a couple of votive size ones. Colored greenish/blue like the ocean in Corolla, they burned too fast but the fragrance was incredible. Put me in another dimension (& since I'm not too wild about the dimension I normally inhabit, this was a good thing, as Martha Stewart might say.) I bought more.

The start of a lovely relationship.... me and my RAIN candles. I'd light one of these, put on Bach (remember, we discussed Bach last week) or maybe even Chopin. Pretty soon, I am happier than I'd ever imagine and it's not illegal, and it's not fattening, and it doesn't turn my lungs to swiss cheese, and it can't give me any communicable diseases... in short, I'm talking nivana. What else is there? Nothing left to complain about.

But lately, I've been having difficulty finding my RAIN candles at my grocery store. They never seem to carry them in the votive size anymore. And I've never found another store that sells them. I tried other fragrances .... KIWI, and BLUEBERRY, SEA SPRAY... all very nice, mind you, but they weren't RAIN. You people out there who are halfway normal might not understand this but to others, like me, (you know who I'm talking about), those of us perched on the edge, ready to fall just about any time into that abyss, the slough of despond (thanks J. Bunyan)... well it's not a pretty sight.

I still had a couple left, burned down to where they maybe could be lit one or two more times, at most. Over the weekend, I finally found a larger size, in jars. They cost twice as much as the votive size but maybe they burn twice as long plus at that point, I would have cut off my left arm for any size. Such a small price to pay, to smell the RAIN.

I bought 2 of the 3 that were on display. I really wanted to buy the 3rd but then I thought I was being just a wee bit piggish. I mean, what if someone else needed a hit? I wasn't going to be the one to buy and burn the last one. Besides, I thought, if I leave one then maybe SOMEONE might be looking down and seeing what a lovely, sharing, caring thing I've done and the next time I go to the store, maybe there will be bins and bins of RAIN candles... enough for everyone, forever.

Okie dokie. That's it for Monday, (can't trust that day... Mama Cass did and look what happened to her.)

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July 17, 1998 7:54AM

Here's a scary thought-- I never got a chance to write in here yesterday... does that mean yesterday never existed?

Actually, I had an exquisite lunch with my friends Margaret & Bob. Beginning with glasses of chilled chablis, Margaret produced a feast: chicken salad on a bed of crisp lettuce, fruit and cheese on the side, fresh croissants, iced tea with a sprig of mint, and, for dessert, sorbet, lacy chocolate cookies, and hot coffee. Yumpty Dumpty, as Merle would say. Bob and Margaret live in this incredible old house; I think they told me Bob's grandfather built it. With huge airy rooms, floor-to-ceiling windows, polished floors and woodwork, every corner holds treasures beyond belief-- the brick fireplace in the kitchen, wicker furniture on the wrap-around porch, vases full of aromatic, fresh cut flowers from the yard... wow! The best part of the afternoon, though, was the conversation. These two people are so knowledgeable, funny, and just plain delightful. I know, it sounds like I was in a dream (let us not forget-- I'm not even certain yesterday really happened.)

Steve wrote me this morning that he is "frantically searching for something brilliant to say that will be worthy" (of my quote pages.) Just the idea of him, in his doctor duds, running around with his hands up in the air, seeking worthy words, I find hysterical. I emailed him back that I named a whole page after his worthy words, for crying out loud... [Gilligan's Island]

Today I'm invited to lunch again; this time with my friend Debbie. (We're doing Chinese.) And Joe wonders why I'm not spending more time looking for a job! Debbie has been away for the past couple of weeks, in Canada, the North Woods. Her family has a cabin by the lake. Does that sound idyllic or what?

We aren't planning a trip to our cabin (also known as snakey house) this weekend, at least not overnight. Lauren is coming to stay at Nana & PapPap's. We're excited; it's been awhile. I bought a new "Clifford, The Big Red Dog" book to read and we have the software we purchased the other day. I didn't, however, take her to see the Spice Girls in concert, for which she may never forgive me. Sorry!!! I still think five is too young to be going to rock concerts (especially for a group like the Spice Girls-- gag!) Now, if she asked to see the Stones, we might have been able to work something out (ha ha!)

Better go check my writing classes-- see how far behind I am. So, until next time, see ya later alligator.

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July 15, 1998 8:52AM EDT

Howdy!!! I sorta, kinda figured out how to use real audio on the web. It's way too cool. I will go refill my coffee cup... brb (that's be right back in chat speak, in case you were wondering, in case anyone's reading this.)

I'm baaacccckkkk. Maybe I've had enough java for today? Naw, just high on life, brothers and sisters. Better than falling down into the abyss (I find my self there so often, I'm starting to call it home.)

So, Jodie's baby is going to be grown up and in college before I see her. Must do something about that. Gotta go "see the baby!"

Puttin on some "Ahhh Bach".... Italian Concerto, Glenn Gould. It is too good for words. Something about Bach, makes order out of disorder, makes sense out of what, in someone else's hands, might/would be chaos. "Ahhh Bach!"

In case you're wondering, my writing classes are going alright. Taking a creativity seminar this week. Already in way over my head... Our instructor (Bob) asked us to define creativity, where does it come from, what does it mean. Everyone else in the class wrote these wonderful esoteric theses. My answer started out something like, "Dang, Bob, if I knew that, I'd be making the big bucks." Kind of gives you a clue where I am, huh?

We've finished up the Latin American stories in the World Literature course and have begun African stories. So far, I've read one by Chinue Achebe and one by Nadine Gordimer. I'm enjoying this class so much. It's putting a whole new perspective on everything in my life, not just literature.

The Fiction 500 class (Preparing for the Novel) is ending this week and I'm having one hell of a time trying to come up with a story for the last assignment. Supposed to have 3 characters: one a compulsive liar, one a braggart, and the third, mentally ill. Sounds like everyone I know! (Ha Ha)

I'm invited to have lunch with my very good friends Bob and Margaret Thompson tomorrow. How sweet of them! I'm looking forward to some good discussions... they are two of my favorite people in the world-- no kidding.

The job search is going nowhere fast. I logged onto CMU's employment database yesterday. Found some very interesting opportunities but the longer I stay unemployed, the more difficult it is for me to believe I'm even employable.

Oh well, I'll try and not think about that (I'll think about it tomorrow, at Tara.) Ta ta for now!

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July 14, 1998 9:05AM EDT

Geez, you people.... Okay, Bill, I fixed your quote.

Today is Tuesday. Joe is at the dentist. Guess something showed up on the x-ray. He had nightmares about it all night. Hope the real trip is going better. (Hope Dr. Allison is sticking to "Scuse me, Pardon me" and not saying "Is it safe?")

Bill and Jacobina are back from their trip (hey, I'm only a couple of weeks behind.) They went to Maine and had a lovely time escaping from the 100+ degree heat they've been having in Texas for the past month. But the BIG news is--- Lucky's gonna be a daddy! Way to go, Luckster! The puppies are due any day now.

By the way, Growlf keeps asking, "Hey, what the dealio?"

We ran into Staples last night-- my printer needed a new cartridge. That place is dangerous. Ended up coming out with 2 cartridges, a set of speakers, and a piece of software for Lauren. Anyway, now I can listen to RetroRadio in STEREO! Lightnin Hopkins, here I come.

Late breaking wind, I mean, news. Joe's back. Problem was a tooth crumbling beneath a crown. (Oooohh!!) Said it wasn't as bad as it sounds. But we will be having milkshakes for dinner. Thanks for reading. Catch you later.

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July 13, 1998 9:53AM EDT

This is the first day of the rest of my life so, in honor of that distinction, I have decided to create a web journal. I will attempt to write in here daily. It'll probably be about as interesting as reading the yellow pages. No, I take that back-- I like to read the yellow pages. Well, let's just see what happens....

So, today is Monday, which, in my opinion, ought to be changed to "Mun"day as in mundane. What day could be worse? But that's a terrible way to think and actually, it's beautiful here today.... sunny, warm, not humid. The birds are singing, the construction crews (working on the church up the street) are pounding, the street repair crew have yet to make an appearance (still living with a mote outside my front walk. I suppose it is too nice for them-- they want to wait for some rain or something.) My dog is waiting for me to feed him (poor baby-- I'll get off this machine soon, I promise.)

My computer has been giving me fits for the past week or so. Today I uninstalled some programs that I thought might be causing the problems. So far, things seem to be working quite a bit better.

Spent the weekend in the country. Nice but the creek is taking away more of the bank, specifically the entrance to the "Creekwalk Arboretum" as we like to call it. Don't know how this can be solved. The creek almost always gets what the creek wants. It's been my experience that like with Mother Nature, it's best not to argue with her.

Didn't run into any snakes in the house this weekend (yeah!) I'm not going to try and delude myself into thinking they have left.. I'm sure they were just to busy to be showing their little snakey faces. I've come to believe, the house is theirs-- they just let us come and stay there sometimes.

I took the scissors to Growlf this weekend. Cut his bangs and the fur around his ears and mouth. He was humiliated and if he could talk (which I'm sure he can but just chooses not to), he would have said, "Spend a buck or two and send me to the dog groomer, please!"

Had visitors at Majorsville yesterday.... Butch and Abby Eiben, from Michigan and California. They surprised me (why wouldn't I be sitting on the front deck still in my nightgown... it was only four o'clock in the afternoon.) Both looked good and we had a nice visit. Exchanged email addresses with Abby and Joe gave him the URL of this page so maybe he'll visit me here sometimes.

Wondering about the rest of the family??? Me too. Last I heard, Merle was going out for a dinner date with a certain old friend, Michael O. Hope she drank some margaritas for me. I think Bill and Jacobina are headed up to New England but not sure when they are leaving.... guess I'd better call them to find out. Heather spent the weekend entertaining friends and filling up Lauren's pool which is so big, it might as well be an inground job, but it doesn't have a pump so she gets to fill it and refill it every week or so to keep it clean!

So, from me to you, that's about it for today. Thanks for reading this, if you did. If you didn't, oh well.

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