You know you've been watching too much anime if...

... you call your car my: mobile suit, engine-chan or Bonaparte.

... you (male) are seriously discussing with another male about how difficult it is to look feminine at a Sailor Senshi cosplay.

... and about the problems of walking in high heels.

... it amazes you that there are people who don't know the meanings of acronyms like GitS, BGC, DBZ, OPP or cryptic expressions like "Nuku^2" and "K1".

... you (female), when angry at your boyfriend, start yelling at him "Daaaaaaaaaaaaarling!".

... your kids, after entering school, begin asking you why their names are "Usagi" and "Dark Schneider".

... asked for the reason why you call your cat "Mr. Invader", you answer "Why, he does have stripes, doesn't he?".

... you're trying to create soc.religion.anime.

... two girls fall in love with you and your first thought is "KOR!".

... your daughter is asked what she wants to be when she grows up and the answer is "devil hunter!!!".

... somebody says they'll give you a big present and your reaction is "Wow! Finally my own mecha!".

... you're trying to go to the supreme court against GRIT.

... you've been caught numerous times pouring hot water over animals.

... every time you see a really big tree, you just have to find out if it is a spaceship.

... when you're deeply moved, your eyes begin to glimmer and your hair starts to wave, even though there's no wind.

... whenever you're embarrassed, you start scratching the back of your head.

... you acquire a strange accent when speaking English and find yourself wondering about how many syllables the word "building" has.

... you're wishing for your daily dressing routine to be as interesting as a magical girl transformation sequence.

... you find out the hard way that tipping over backwards as a reaction to a stupid remark is not something you can do without getting hurt.

... you can't stand Star Trek but watch it anyway because of the anime references.

... almost all your CDs are anime soundtracks.

... you're wondering why most female breasts, completely against your habits, obey the laws of gravity.

... you think it's strange that your girlfriend cooks well.

... your nose begins to bleed when you see a naked woman.

... you (female) start to cry at every little inconvenience.

... alternatively, you start carrying the biggest guns you can find.

... you call someone with mixed heritage e.g. a "Japanese-Half".

... you call things "Chibi" instead of small (ie. I'll have a Chibi-coke!)

... you start having super-deformed dreams.

... girls in school uniforms start featuring in your wet dreams.

... and are soon after followed by monsters with tentacles.

... you see someone in the street with green or orange hair, and don't think it's strange anymore.

... you actually think it's strange that most of the people you know all have the same boring hair colors, so many shades of brown.

... you try to feed your cat carrots.

... you begin your e-mails with "Konnichi wa!" and end them with "Ja Mata!" or "Mata ne!".

... you suddenly find yourself writing for a fanzine.

... you can't wait for the next big con.

... you seriously consider costume-playing.

... you only buy "Otomo" washing powder.

... you see "Oakland" written somewhere but instead read "Otakuland".

... you always eat your bread with "Ranma" butter on it in hope of geting as fast and strong as he is.

... someone says something like: "you should go cook game sense" or "Pick me up foxy night game" to you and you understand him.

... you go to an SM club hoping to meet Rei or Ami.

... you are reading this list, you know what we are talking about, and think it's funny.
you knew this one would show up!

... you go to a plastic surgeon and ask him if he can make your eyes 1/3 the size of your face.

... you compare yourself to "Otaku no video" characters... and the comparisons match!

... you discuss the significance and technical feasibility of the SDF Macross transformations.

... you appear on TV, Radio or in the newspapers as an authority on anime.

... you try to put through school uniforms at your school.

... you wear a school uniform (japanese style, of course) even though your school does not demand them.

... you understand all the jokes in Urusei Yatsura.

... you understand the meaning behind UY movie 4 "Lum the Forever".

... you understand the plot of Evangelion.

... you think Hideaki Anno should make more complicated films.

... you try to trick your cat into talking.

... you think girls with bunny/cats ears and/or tails are cute.

... you proclaim that Osamu Tezuka is god and Miyazaki is His messenger.

... you know the entire Japanese script to an anime by heart, though you don't speak any Japanese.

... you think that "Willow" is the live action Dragon Half and the little people are in SD.

... you start waving pens around hoping you can transform.

... you use Sailormoon tampons (they exist, you know!)

... you get up at 7.45am on a Saturday morning to see Sailormoon.

... your parents/family/friends don't anymore look at you in a funny way when they see you watching "cartoons".

... you imagine you're having sex with your favourite anime character.

... you imagine you're having sex with an SD anime character.

... you have a collection of girls underwear.

... you travel thousands of miles to attend an anime convention.

... you think your car is able to transform into a big robot.

... and combine with others to form an even bigger robot.

... you think that the spot on your forehead is a third eye.

... the letters "SM" have different meanings for you depending on whether or not the words "And I don't mean Sailor Moon" are added.

... while watching a martial arts world championship tournament you think "Those guys can't be any good, they don't yell the names of their moves.".

... you think "Country Road" is much more beautiful in Japanese ("Konto Roodo" as sung in "Mimi o sumaseba")

... you pray every morning:

Tezuka-Sama,
who art in heaven,
Hallowed be thy Name.
Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done,
In Europe as it is in Japan and in the States
Give us this day our daily anime and manga
And forgive us our trespasses,
As we forgive those who trespass against us.
And lead us not into watching cheap american cartoon crap,
and deliver us from Disney.
For thine is the storyboard, the creativity, and the glory, for ever and ever.
Amen.

... you see someone with blue hair walking next to someone with blond hair and you think: the blond is probalbly dyed!

... you watch a porno movie and are wondering were all the tentacles are.

... you say anooo instead of uuuh.

... you watch a live action movie and think: Wow the animation's so good it looks almost real!!

... you can sing the opening theme of Starblazers.

... and you like it.

... you listen to an anime soundtrack and suddenly a vision of what is happening while that segment of music is playing appears before your eyes.

... you wonder why those sound effects do not appear IRL.

... you defend lovingly to the death any character you like.
Try it out! Post anything bad about Washu-chan, Rupan, or, if you have a death wish, Ukyou to r.a.a.m and die!

... you come home from vacation, notice the 5000+ accumulated postings in r.a.a.m, think "Well, it can't be helped" and start reading.

... your goal in life is to become an anime/manga artist, writer, producer, director, composer or voice actor.

... you are talking seriously about Sharon Apple's concert on Earth and hope you can get a ticket for it.

... you enjoy driving around window wide open while hearing the EVA OT as loud as possible while people are looking at you in a really startled way.

... you run around givng speeches, followed by silly gestures and ending with "For love and justice, I am (insert name), in the name of the moon, I shall punish you!" for no good reason.

... on the day the clocks get turned back you think " All right! Today I have twentyfive hours to watch anime!"

... you name your computer drives after anime characters.

... you actually have one ZIP medium for each of your favourite characters, filled solely with images and sound samples of that chara.

... for some characters, one ZIP disk isn't enough!

... you ask every Japanese on the street: "Anata mo anime no otaku desu ka?" (At this point, you should really consult your psychiatrist very soon!!)

... you don't watch any live action movies or series anymore.

... you start comparing people to anime characters, pondering about how you would draw them if you were to convert them into anime.

... any word that starts with "A" and includes "n" and "m" attracts your attention.

... you start using Japanese swear words at other drivers.

... you wonder in conversations about the "ideal man/woman" how to tell people that yours is a cartoon character.

... all your net time is dedicated to researching anime stuff and all your bookmarks consist of anime URLs and your 1st page is always the Anime Web Turnpike.

... every morning during breakfast, you play the "Misato" theme from Evangelion.

... you don't know Michelle Pfeiffer, Andie McDowell, Al Pacino, Michael Douglas, Juliette Binoche or Antonio Banderas, but of course you know Rika Matsumoto, Toshihiko Seki, Kikuko Inoue, Yuko Kobayashi, Megumi Hayashibara and Norio Wakamoto.

... and you can tell apart all those seiyuu after a single sentence a most.

... you think $300 for a Sailor Moon cel are a worthwhile investment.

... your greatest dream is owning a 1:1 scale garage kit of Ayanami Rei.

... you declare Chibi-Usa to be an incarnation of pure evil and burn dolls of her at the stake of some public place in your home town.

... you try to make your friend jealous by telling them "I have seen all episodes of <insert any long-running anime show>"!!

... and you succeed.

... actually, not only have you seen all episodes, you have videotaped them.

... another of your jealousy-generating tactics is writing emails that look like this:

In Nadia I especially liked the episode where Nadia discovers that she's ******* **** ****** and tries to **** *** * *****, but **** ***** prevents it by ******* her ***** ****. When she ***** **, she learns that it's her ********! Of course shortly afterwards ********* *** *********** arrive and spoil the scene.

... you go to a tailor and tell him that you will pay any price for a cloak that billows impressively even when there's no wind and that never gets tangled, dirty or caught on something.

... you go on vacation to Tokyo and are completely amazed that it doesn't get destroyed even once during your stay!

... you know exactly what the expression "Gainax bounce" describes.

... you even notice occasions where said "bounce" should have occured but didn't.

... and you discuss the reasons for its absence with other otaku.

... it took you quite some time to recover from the laughing fits when you learned that there is a master of Aikido named "Saotome".

... every time you go to a disco which uses fog, you have to supress a laugh because it reminds you of "Dragon Half".

... you (female) discuss with other female otaku what you think are the general character treats of male otaku. and of course you have a lot to talk about...

... one of the questions that bug you is: "Does Ranma ever masturbate? If yes, does he use both his female and male form? Does he prefer one?

... you read more anime fan fiction than anything else.

... you seriously consider trying to read all available Ranma fan fiction.

... you suddenly find yourself writing fan fiction.

... you call 555-1212 (Goddess Relief Office) and hope that Skuld appears.

... someone tells you about how they are trying to get non-otaku to watch anime and you encourage them with "Tatake, Otaking!".

... that happens to you, and you immediately reply "Jama wa sasenai!".

... you base your choice of classes in school and college on whether or not you could write something about anime in them.

... you write a term paper about your favourite series and discover that you have already filled all ten pages writing about favourite character.

... you then decide not to cut out anything, after all the professor didn't specify if it's allowed to fill both sides of the pages...

I hope you liked these little statements I know I did.