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sailormoon
From: ej613@cleveland.Freenet.Edu (Maureen S. O'Brien) The following is
intended as Babylon 5/Sailor Moon humor. We join this nightmare already in
progress.
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DELENN (genetically engineered Human/Minbari female; Minbari Ambassador):
Draal, dear friend, it's time. Babylon...5...POWER! [Her clothes transform
into a pure white sailor suit. Underneath it she wears white Minbari gi
pants and soft B5-blue Minbari boots.] [shot of four wands raised
together, various transformations] G'KAR (Narn male; Narn Ambassador): [in
a fetching green-skirted sailor suit] In the name of G'Quan, I am Ranger
Narn! LENNIER (Minbari male; Delenn's aide and sworn companion): For Dukat,
I am Ranger Minbar! [bows slightly in yellow-skirted sailor suit.] CMDR.
SUSAN IVANOVA (Human female; 2nd in command of Babylon 5 station): I am
Ranger Earth. Do not annoy Ranger Earth. Ranger Earth is God! [Red skirt.
Looks up towards Heaven.] Just joking, of course.... VIR (Centauri male;
Centauri Ambassador Mollari's aide): [purple skirt] I am Ranger Centauri!
In the name of the Empire I will right wrongs and punish evil, and that
means YOU! [stops pointing and looks embarrassed] Sorry, Londo.
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IVANOVA: You were my best friend! Talia, fight the NegaShadows! TALIA
WINTERS (Human female; commercial telepath): The NegaShadows are my
mother! The NegaShadows are my father! [She uses her telekinesis to rain
pennies from heaven onto the Ranger Scouts.] G'KAR: She is lost to us,
Ranger Earth. But we will find Queen Beryl and use her bones for
noseflutes. After we slay her...slowly. [The other Ranger Scouts give him
pained looks.] G'KAR: Sorry. I'm still not used to being the good guy
around here.
__________________________________________________________________________
LONDO MOLLARI (Centauri Ambassador with tragic flaw): [sadly] If I had not
fallen into evil, I would have been Ranger Centauri. I should have been.
_I_ am the one who looks stunning in purple.
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[Spanish guitar strum] CAPT. JOHN SHERIDAN (Human male; Commander of
Babylon 5 station): [in a Scarecrow-like tuxedo and Zorro-like black mask]
Hey, Ranger Scouts, want some help from Tuxedo Hand? DELENN: (catching the
small red fruit he throws her) John! You're here! Do you think that Kosh
has trained us well enough? Do you think we are ready to face the
NegaShadows? KOSH (Vorlon Ambassador in encounter suit): [flashback] The
Silver Krellenium of Mankind has begun. It is too late for the fanboys to
vote. SHERIDAN: Sure we are, Ranger Babylon! You just have to believe in
yourself, and then you can walk like giants through the stars. [voiceover]
Anyway, it's not like we have a choice....
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[cut to woman sleeping next to man in bed. He is tossing and turning. With
a gasp, he wakes, and we see that it is the Great Maker.] JMS: Kathryn, it
was terrible. I dreamed that an anime superhero series had taken over
Babylon 5! I'm so glad it was only a... [Woman turns over. She is Takeuchi
Naoko, creator of _Lovely Warrior Sailor Moon_, and she wears a wedding
ring inscribed with the Sailor Moon symbol.] JMS: ....dream? TAKEUCHI:
(raising hand that bears ring) Anime crossover magic! [JMS and TAKEUCHI
float up into the air. JMS ends up wearing a ranger cloak & jewel
brooch, while TAKEUCHI's pajamas transform into a wedding gown.] TAKEUCHI:
Resist the NegaShadows, Prince Straczynski! Remember our past, when we
ruled Epsilon Eridani from the Silver Krellenium City a thousand years
ago! JMS: [looking confused] Er, let me check my datebook. I can't
remember what I did last year without it. TAKEUCHI: Oh, Prince Straczynski!
You must remember! [considers] Maybe if I shake you a little.... [She
shakes him violently; JMS' head acquaints itself with several walls and
corners.] JMS: [shaken, not stirred] I'll remember anything you want, as
long as it doesn't involve cute kids or robots! (considers) Unless they
die terrible, tragic yet futile deaths, of course. TAKEUCHI: [kisses JMS
passionately. Thought voiceover.] I'll tell him about Chibi-Usa --
tomorrow. Back
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