Colonel Tim "Deathlord" Cooper, Executive Officer, Napier's Rednecks
Some would say the Tulagi campaign of 3020 was pretty soft. Sure, the numbers tell that story--an augmented RCT of us Dragon-paid mercs against a few combined-arms companies of defending Davions. Sure, we pretty-well trounced the Federated Suns armies, at least in the first day and a half. Once we got to the spaceport of that rock, though, it became pretty hectic very fast. And we wondered why they always kept retreating before our advance.
I and my BLR-1G BattleMaster, the "Übermensch," were in the first five 'Mechs to cross the flight line towards the excecutive centers of the base. A few hangars to the left and right, a control tower ahead, and past that the city. True to form, "Moses"--General Napier--led the attack with his heaviest 'Mechs; his Atlas, Tommy's Awesome, Bill's Guillotine, and Jack's Marauder. I formed on the Atlas's right as we went around the left side of the tower, the other three went around the right side and came under some pretty heavy fire. Hiding behind the first row of buildings were, uh, from right to left (my orientation) a Whitworth, an Orion, the strangest-looking JagerMech I'd ever seen, and a Catapult. Behind the Whitworth was a Blackjack. In front of the buildings were three LRM carriers and two Partisans.
All of the LRM-equipped defenders let loose of Tommy. Most of the greenies missed, and the Awesome shrugged off whatever managed to hit it. As we wanted to make room for the twenty-one 'Mechs behind us, Tommy and Jack blew two out of the three LRM carriers straight to Hell. I was blocked by the control tower, but heard from reports and saw on the radar that little tanks, mostly Goblins and Scorpions, came out of the city with a Partisan along the side. That was when Moses ran from the cover of the control tower. Up until then he had traded fire with a single LRM carrier and had done well in the process. The moment he cleared that tower he drew the fire of every single damn tank that could see him. At least twelve medium autocannon went off in his direction, I counted three large lasers (you can tell from the blue tint), and more missiles than I could comprehend. Most of it missed. Two autocannon hit him; some torso and arm damage--no more than scratched paint, really--and then he took one of those light long-range missiles in the face. It must have shook him just right, cause he spun around in a way that could have only happened if he had slumped onto some controls and landed on a practically pristine left side.
He then disappeared in a massive red-orange fireball. Dammit, I would have expected something left from the ammunition explosion, but the Atlas was entirely vaped. Gone. I paused--of course I paused, you haven't known fear until you see one of those juggernauts explode into a billion tiny useless pieces for no adequately explained reason--and remained behind the control tower. Two friendly Schreks came past me and opened up on a poor little Scorpion at 450 meters, managing to miss it most of the time. I helped by blasting the Übermench's particle cannon into that 25-tonner's front. I can assume by the fact it ceased moving that I had killed it.
While I was busy watching my boss die and taking on the mantle of command as my own, behind our battle line two of our Demolisher heavy tanks were to drive through a few hangars and assist in a flanking maneuver. However, it didn't work out. This is how I heard it from Bob in the Rifleman and Joe in the Panther, who were closest to this debacle:
Our tanks roll through the cheap sheet-metal segmented doors of the two seperate hangars. The headlights of both reveal massive metal structures, they slam the brakes and stop. Looking up, the commanders both see big 'Mechs towering over them. The Davion's poor attempt at a counter-flank. Taking the tanks individually now, the far Demolisher sees a Grasshopper. He stays calm, fires both of those heavy autocannon into the 'Hopper's kneecaps. Armor flakes off, and the 'Hopper returns the favor by locking the Demolisher's turret and peeling off some front armor. Fair is fair. The closer tankhad a far different story. The commander sees a Victor aiming its heavy autocannon towards his tank, panics, says some exclamatory curse, and blows the Victor's ankles off. The pilot fails to keep his 'Mech upright, falls forward, and pours all of his weaponry into our tank while cursing the same exclamation. The crew get lased by the Victor's onslaught, and the Demolisher's front armor gets totaled. The same front armor the Victor hurtles face-first into. All of the fuel and ammunition left in that tank husk explode, catching the Victor and spreading it in ripped shards of varying sizes into the ceiling of the hangar. Which promptly collapses. End result: Six dead men and one screwed hangar.
With our fearless leader down and buildings collapsing behind us, we keep our heads and proceed to avenge the General. Ten seconds after he fell, we destroyed one Partisan, two Scorpions, one LRM carrier, and three Goblins, leaving only one lonely Scorpion in the field. Obviously, the Scorpion got screwed over, hard. I ordered the troops to concentrate on the 'Mechs taking cover behind the first row of buildings, beginning with the Whitworth. Particle cannon, large lasers, and missiles peppered that little 'Mech and the unfortunate office complex it stood behind. Honestly, I found it amazing how much fire that 'Mech took before it finally melted away--its arms being burnt off, the torso holed and melted straight through--it is truly a frightening sight, seeing the lethality of modern weaponry. Then, off to my right, I see poor Jacko's Marauder go up in a fireball not half as impressive as General Napier's. Still, by that time the Marauder was being held together by memories and prayers anyway so the debris flew quite far--a bit of his port dorsal pod bounced off my canopy, and I was at least 150 meters away. The modified JagerMech took a few hits, but shrugged them off better than any JM I'd ever seen before. Still, you can only upgrade a 'Mech's armor so much, so we pummeled it back into the Devonian Era anyway.
Fortunately for us, we had passed the ninety-second mark in the battle and so everyone was almost out of LRM ammunition--especially bad for those sad Davions. As we pressed foreward, they fell back on the bounce deeper into the city--the kind of short-range melees me and the Übermensch love. Even though we had the entire damn sector covered, they still managed to elude us--lucky bastards. Our Catapult actually did find the Davion Catapult and decided to Death-From-Above his opposite number. DFA? Death From Above? Doing Frickin' Acid if you ask me, that's why my 'Mech stays on the ground where it smegging belongs. Anyway, our guy landed on the other guy's head, and no 'Mech can take a 65-tonner's foot in the face. The fun thing was that our hero's foot got shredded in the process and the leg actually got stuck in the poor victim's torso. They both go down, and CRACK! Our Catapult is now a monopod, and the Warrior inside of it is taking a little trauma-induced nap. The Orion was done in through cooperation between myself and, of all things, Tommy's slower-than-dirt Awesome. I cannot believe how slow those bricks are; they're five tons less than the Übermensch and still go about twenty percent slower at full tilt. The Jenner fell into a cunning trap and got shot up, leaving only a lone jump-happy Javelin to deal with. No one wanted that little bugger to bounce off their windshields, so we gave him plenty of room until he tried to jump on a Panther of ours. Lucky for the Panther the Javelin clipped a control tower on the way down and crashed into the street. Five seconds later, no Javelin.
After a few minutes of pitched battle we were now the definite owners of Tulagi. After the battle we found Jacko and General Napier, both in worlds of hurt but fixable. We got our money from the Combine, and are now the official Tulagi Defense Force. We get a paycheck and everything from the Kuritans--I suppose we did so well that they'd love to use us again. They don't really trust us, however (and when has the Dragon trusted anyone?) so they have their own "police force:" The freakin' Sixth Sword of Light division. A crack unit like that on a tiny world like this makes one wonder...
Oh well, at least we've made our contingency plans: When the inevitable Davion counterattack comes along, we'll skip town on our slightly used Star Lord JumpShip, along with some paying passengers, to some friends of mine in the Chaos March. From there, we'll probably sell ourselves to the Fist (where I've got some connections) or Marik (which is so screwy they'd hire anyone). But not Liao--I'll never work for those blackballing bastards.
Tim "Deathlord" Cooper
Acting Commanding Officer, Napier's Rednecks
First Tulagi Guards