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PiKeStAfF's ImAgInArY ReDwAlL ClUb--
sponsored by your local Society of Friends to Spoons

"HA HA HA!!!!!! I knew you were going to join my Imaginary Club! There is no escape! There is no spoon! I'm so excited, I think I'll do my Triangle Laugh.... ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Oh, and did I mention that I'm hyper?

If you want to succeed in my club, you have to meet or exceed my HQ (Hyperness Quotient for all you illiterates out there) If you do, then you will be stamped with Pikestaff's Official Seel of approval... hey, Skrowerife, where's the Seel?"

The Pikachu dæmon, named Skrowerife, holds out a Poké Ball and releases a recently-caught Seel. It holds up a sign. Pikestaff's Official Seel of Approval, says the sign.

"That's right! And you know the rules, you know the lifelines-- 50/50, ask the audience, phone a friend-- so let's play WHO WANTS TO JOIN PIKESTAFF'S CLUB!

Lights dim. Spotlights flash. And game show music plays as both you and Pikestaff pull up chairs and the game begins...

What is your name?

What is your quest?

What is your favorite color?

What is your species?

What is your gender?

What do you get if you mix Hydrochloric Acid and Sodium Hydroxide?

What is your definition of the word "hyper"?

What is your dæmon's name?

What kind of Pokémon is your dæmon?

Rodion Romanovitch Raskolnikov is the main character in what novel?

Why does your nose look like that, anyway?

Marvin K. Mooney Will You Please Go Now!

What color is an orange?

What is your favorite food? There are no wrong answers to this question.

Can you spell your name?

How do you think spoons feel about being oppressed and unthanked in silverware drawers across America?

Would you like to save 10% on your purchase today and apply for a Target Card?

What e-mail address will I be able to reach you at? (This is important. No, seriously.)

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