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If MaRtIn WaS A JeDi KnIgHt...
...a scary thought, but let's think it nonetheless...

Long ago, in a galaxy far, far away...

Instead of the legendary sword of Martin, it would be the legendary lightsaber of Martin and would do some major damage when it hurtled off the roof in Salamandastron.

Cluny would be referred to as Darth Cluny and would wear a hood everywhere he went.

Sparrows would not save the day. X-Wings would.

Cluny would not come riding in on a hay wagon; he would come in the Death Star.

A Rancor could land on Cluny instead of that bell.

We would discover, after Rose's death, that she is actually Martin's sister.

Mokkan the Fox would make the ultimate bounty hunter: Mokkan Fett.

Slagar's mask would be black instead of checkered.

Cluny is actually Matthias's father.

A pod race would be held around the Redwall pond at every Summer's Eve Feast.

Searats would be replaced by the so much more versatile battle droids.

Heck with those pits of cannibal frogs or scary sea monsters; the characters would simply be frozen in carbonite.

No, your eyes aren't deciving you... yes, the whole time, the Redwall mice have actually been Ewoks.

Grath Longfletch wouldn't need arrows; she'd throw around those tiny poison dart things instead.

He may call himself Methusaleh, he may pretend to follow Matthias around for the heck of it, but we all know he's actually Obi-Wan Kenobi.

Yoda would have a British accent and a thing for food.

That crazy black squirrel in The Legend of Luke? Her real name is Shmi Skywalker.

When Cornflower says to Matthias, "I love you," Matthias answers, "I know."

Tsarmina's favorite phrase is "Come to me, my prey."

The dune hogs are native to Tatooine.

That thing that the badgers use-- it's not actually called "The Bloodwrath." It's more commonly known as "The Force."

Don't worry about those pesky searat ships anymore-- Martin can lift them out of the water.

Otters are distant kin to Gungans. That's why you have to swim through the water to get to their Ruddaring place.


Got one of your own to send in? E-mail me at sparks@pwv.zzn.com and I'll post it on this page. You can even send in more than one if you want. After all, we're just one big happy family here in my head.


Or, you can be a spoilsport, not send one in, and just click here to go back to the main page.