Johnny, thinking life's a bore,
Drank some H2SO4
Johnny's father, an MD
Gave him H2CO3
Jonny's neutralized, it's true...
But now he's full of CO2.
"Ah yes, poor Johnny. And his problem's never cease, do they? I mean, just take a look at this:
Johnny had a stomachache
He hasn't anymore.
For what he thought was H2O
...Was H2SO4.
And now, we'll all sing a little song...
"A mole digging in a hole
Digging up my soul now going down
Excavation
I and I in the sky
You make me feel like I can fly so high
El-ev-a-tion!"
"And no, I don't have the energy to type out the entire song at this point. Maybe sometime later. So instead I will flaunt my chemistry test scores: an 88% on the first mid-term and a 92% on the second mid-term, without really studying at all, and that's for Chem 131 which isn't your normal everyday chem class, let me tell ya'!
"Furthermore I would take this opportunity to write out some 35 or so reaction prediction rules in order to give a boost to any stragglers out there, but I just realized I left them at home. Don't worry, I will bring them next time!! Until then...
Joke Time:
"Werner Heisenberg is driving down the freeway when he gets pulled over by a cop. The cop asks him, 'Do you know how fast you were going?' and Heisenberg responds, 'No, but I know where I am!!'
"Here's another one: What do you call a rusty ring? A FERROUS WHEEL.
"Ferrous, ferris, get it? HA HA, isn't that just great?! Wait a minute... you're not laughing... you mean you didn't think that was funny?? Holy HONClBrIF, I don't believe it. Get out of here, go on, shoo, make like an electrolyte and dissociate! Hmmph, kids these days just can't appreciate National Mole Day anymore... why, in my day..."
