People don't understand. How could he do that? Why
would she even think such a thing? How could she
leave her children behind? Why? How? Maybe? If?
I understand. So do the thousands of other people
who have ever contemplated suicide. It's because
of the pain! The emotional and the physical pain
become so overwhelming that there seems to be no
other way out. This may seem to be the only way
to free the families from our burdens. To become
less of a problem to our loved ones. This may
seem like the only way our families can make a new
start. "If I'm dead, then my pain will stop."
Dead, finito, over. "I just want it over!"
Do I condone suicide? No. Do I recommend it? NO!
Have I been there? Have I prayed for death? Yes!!!
I have pleaded with God to give me the courage to die.
I have pleaded with Lucifer to take me! Realize now,
Lucifer's telling me and others that this is the only
way out. He's saying how much better it will be for
family, and friends, if I would take my life away from
theirs. You see, then I'd be doing something where
they would reap huge benefits and freedom. This is
Lucifer's goal, deceit and destruction. So why then,
since Lucifer wants me dead am I still here? Because
of God, who claims my life and so many others. Do you
suppose that He's the one who reminds me that if my
family is so important that they would rather have me
whole than lying as a vegetable or being handicapped?
He's provided the person in my life that just had to
point out an end place of Heaven and Hell. I resented
that! I didn't want to think about that. I just
wanted my life to be over, not to make everlasting
decisions! Heaven, a life everlasting of peace. Hell,
a life eternal of anguish and pain. Yes, there are
people who've died by their own hand. Some of them I
knew. Why were they able to complete the act? Because
God had a purpose, do I know what it was? No I don't.
And I won't pretend I do. Did the families of these
people suffer? Yes they did. If God can use all things
for good, there were positive things that also came
from them. Families that were torn apart are being put
together. As family, friend, and suicide contemplator,
these acts have helped put together this web page.
To those left behind, seek help. You need to stop
blaming yourself and to let go of the guilt. You see,
your person didn't die to punish you, he/she just
wanted to stop the pain!!! Too often guilt shows it's
ugly head. Sometimes you'll have warnings of depression
and sometimes not.
You can't be watching your person 24 hours a day.
God can, yet He won't interfere against our will.
Why did He interfere in mine? Because He knew my
heart. He knew that I need to be right here talking
to you. Maybe because of the scars on my wrists, etc
maybe then you'll realize you aren't alone. That
someone does understand, somebody that has been there.
Whether your heartache is in ending your pain or
coping with someone who has, here at God's Page,
we DO understand. Share your pain, seek help,
reason will come to be ALIVE!!! You just have to
hold on for it. It will happen. Let us know what
we can do to help. God is in the picture
and He is part of your life!
Did I really want to commit suicide? I don't
think so. You see, I just wanted to be dead.
To stop the pain. That's all!
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