(When we last left the Jepi Knights, they had discovered a nefarious plot about clones.  With little information to go on, they went where all clueless people begin searches for knowledge - the library.)

(In the Jepi Library of Everything You Can Think Of. O-Ben and Shannikin are checking the card catalogue.)

O-Ben (grumbling): We're the most advanced civilization in the universe and we have a card catalogue. (looks up) Dang it!  Where'd Shannikins get to?

(Shannikin pops up out of nowhere holding a book entitled "Little Known Islands Specializing In Clone Technology and the Making of Inter-ocean Armies.")

Shannikin: This may be the answer to all our problems!

O-Ben (agog): You can read?

Shannikin (grits his teeth): 'Master,' that joke is so told.

O-Ben (chuckles): Couldn't help myself. (takes book and flips through it quickly) You just vindicated all that time I spent training you.  Let's go.

(On a balcony, the two greatest members of the Jepi Council contemplate the newest and volatile Jepi.)

Mace Usoppu: Do you think that Shannikin is the one who will bring balance to the "Fruit"?

(Usoppu is directing his comments at a place around his knees - for there stands the undisputed master of the Jepi.)

Choppa: Know I do.

Mace Usoppu: Have you considered what is meant by the word 'balance'?

Choppa: Understand you I do not, Usoppu.

Mace Usoppu: There's about 10,000 Jepi Knights, but only a handful of Sea Lords - so either there's gonna be a large influx of Sea Lords or about 99.9% less Jepi.

Choppa: (beat) Uh-oh.

==============

(The Island of the Clones.O-Ben and Shannikin enter the reception lobby of Clones R' Us©.  A fishperson, in an extremely loud aloha shirt, is sitting at the reception desk.)

Fishperson Receptionist: Can I help you, gentlemen?

O-Ben (winging it): Hi, um, yes, we're here to check up on some clones we ordered, ma'am.

Fishperson: I'm male.

O-Ben: Sir. (mutters) Curse these ambiguous outer island species variations!

Fishman: You're early - we're still training the last batch. (beams)  Well, why don't you follow me and we'll take at look at your brand new army of doom!  First why don't I introduce you to the original genetic material…ah, there he is now. Oh, Mr. Kohza!  The buyers are here!

(The fishman takes the Jepi to the rail that Kohza is gazing over.  The fishman points below.  When the Jepi look over the rail, they see...)

O-Ben: Swordtroopers!

Shannikin: Hundreds of thousands of them!

Fishman (suspiciously): It's what you ordered.

O-Ben (lamely trying to cover his ass): Of course, we were just so surprised at the quality and craftmanship.

Kohza (derisively): Craftmanship? Those are Kohza version 2.0.

O-Ben (taking a good look at Kohza and then the clones): They don't look like your exact copies…

Kohza (gesturing at the thousands training below): Supposedly they're a better version - they don't need glasses.

Fishman: But the gene for eyesight and hair color are related -

Kohza: - hence the mold.

(O-Ben and Shannikin take a better look.  Indeed it appears that the 'clones' have green hair and no glasses.  And a few more scars than the original.  Not to mention a better six pack and a lot more muscles in the upper body department.  Plus superior sword skills and - )

Kohza: Ahem.

(But other than that, they are exactly the same as the original.  Except for one tiny detail…  And not in a sick way.  Get your mind out of the gutter.)

Kohza: I think the aliens would have been better off making clones that were closer to the original version, if you get my drift.

Fishman (fawning): Kohza, you're much too smart and we couldn't have soldiers that think for themselves, could we?

Kohza (flattered): Well, when you put it that way…

Fishman (aside to O-Ben): Actually, it was the fangirl demand - we'll make more money selling Zoro on e-bay than we would with exact Kohza replicas.

Kohza (sharply): I heard that.

Voice: What's going on?

(A Kohza-ko stands in the doorway - this clone appears to be an exact replica.)

Shannikin: Mini-me?

Kohza: No.  Mini-me.

Kohza-ko: When are we going bounty-hunting again, Dad?

Kohza (frantically): Shhhhhh….

(Kohza-ko clamps his hands over his mouth.)

Shannikin (pulling O-Ben aside): Don't you think it's kind of strange - we followed a clue from a bounty hunter to clones and another bounty hunter?

O-Ben: Strange is not the word I was thinking of.  Suspicious is more like it. (pulls out his light shotgun) Kohza Ver. 1.0 - please come with us.

Kohza (eyes the shotgun): How about I just…(turns and grabs Kohza-ko as he races out the door.)

O-Ben (standing back): Shannikins, after him!

Shannikin (also standing back): You go after him.  I'm a middle distance runner.

Fishman: No fighting near the merchandise.  Take it outside, gentlemen.

(Shannikin and O-Ben stroll outside, just in time to see Kohza and Kohza-ko's ship disappear over the horizon.)

==============
In the present

San Holo: Is the gene for eyesight and hair color also related to directional relationships? 

O-Ben: As a matter of fact, it is.

San Holo (grinning): I always wondered why Swordtroopers couldn't find the broadside of a barn in the middle of Kansas corn country.

Luff: Aren't Swordtroopers the scourge of the sea?

San Holo: They are, kid, but only if they can find the sea.

==============
Random Quote Analysis
"Ew.  What did I step in?  I hope it wasn't endangered." - Skippy Mitchell

ShuShu: Wan. Wan. BURP! Wan. Wan wan.
[(giggling) That would have been an excellent analysis had you not belched right in the middle of it.]
ShuShu: Wan! Buuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrppppp!
Kohza (pulling a face): That's disgusting. (to the Author) Surely you can find someone better than a dog to partner me with?
[(intrigued) You want try-outs?]
Kohza: I would like someone who's my species.
[Okay!]


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Terms Explained
You saw the clone thing coming miles away, didn't you?
So what did I butcher this time around - Sylph's infamous Klondike commercials (upper left corner…) and Fumbum's Shaaaaankusu spam. Oh and Mr. Lucas' entire galactic mythology...